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''HELP US TO HELP YOU, THREE''

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Evelyn

Evelyn Report 13 May 2010 20:34

My goodness how the world has changed over the years.
When my son was born in 1953 I had 3 cards and a bouquet of Carnations, nowadays they have dozens of cards and baby showers, some of the presents are an embarrassment they cost so much money, I guess it is just a sign of the times. I really dont begrudge them all the presents but I sometimes feel the money could be better spent.
Evelyn

SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 13 May 2010 21:02

At "our" baby shower, I sat next to J's grandmother-in-law .............. a wonderful 84 year old, called Edith, who we try to meet every time we go over there.

We started talking about showers .......... I think we were both a little horrified by the outdo-one-another attitude from the "other" family!! Which actually was not "in value" but in quantity! Don't buy just one outfit, buy 4, then also add a couple of other things to the bag.

It's such a pity, because some thingw were already too small, and others will probably only be worn once or twice. Plus, I'm not being really nasty here, but some of the outfits were "cheap".

Anyway, Edith said that in her day and to her mind, wedding showers were for people who you might like to invite to the wedding but couldn't for whatever reason. Gifts were kept small, and no-one was expected to buy more than one gift.

She was horrified at the tale I had from Vancouver of one woman who was invited to 10 showers for the same bride, and also to the wedding. Then there was the bridesmaid who was invited to 8 showers plus the wedding. Gifts to be bought every time of course!

I haven't actually heard much about wedding showers since those 2 hit the news a couple of years ago!!


Evelyn ..... I was a little like you. A few cards and a bunch of flowers. I also got a couple of gifts for J from close friends, but that was it! One group of about 20 had a whip round, and then one of them went out and bought a soft toy and a little dress.

One close friend (single male) did a wonderful thing for J, which I've since copied for my great niece and -nephew. He opened a bank account with a small amount of money, in trust for J .......... then handed the bank book to me, told me to change the name to ours, and use it as we wanted.

It was a godsend at various times. I would deposit bits of money, including the family allowance cheque, then could draw on it for large expenses that we might find difficult. For example, J had wide feet upto the age of about 9 or so. Canadian and American shoes only came in one width .... so we had to buy Clarks wide fittings shoes and sandals ...... imported from England, and therefore at great cost. I think they cost something like $50 or $60 at a time when Canadian-made shoes cost about $20.

We kept that account going right up to when J got married. It was a place to put and save amounts of money that she could use to buy books and supplies at university, and she also used it for some of the costs of her wedding. After she married, I closed the account and handed whatever remained in to her ................. I think it was about $400 (~ £200) that had accumulated over the years! I don't like to think how much moved in and out over the years!!


Of course, the ideal would have been just to accumulate the money for her, not spend it!! But you can't always do that when you are young and struggling.


It is much harder to open a bank account now for other people's children ...... but I've followed the idea by sending a cheque to our two nieces and telling them what we want them to do. Both girls thought it was a great idea. Each of them is expecting again this year, so another cheque and another bank account!!


s
xxx


FRANK06

FRANK06 Report 13 May 2010 21:11

I quite agree Evelyn,

Here in UK baby showers are starting to take off but in USA it is just crazy, Canada as well Sylvia........

Talking of dates, my brother has just posted a photograph of our family c 1956 on his facebook when we were living in France with gt gran, gran, etc and I was only three years old.
I looked quite cute with my blonde hair and blue eyes..........well I thought so ;))

Catherine

Catherine Report 13 May 2010 22:06

Evening everyone!

Did someone mention 1956? Excellent year that, something very important happened in that year! Someone was born then, mentioning no names, but she now lives in France. Hmmmm wonder who that could be?

Well I'm busy busy again. We're trying to finish off all the work we have still yet to do in the garden and the outside of the house, so we are busy tiling the front terrace. Bit complicated to start with but once we get going it shouldn't take too long to finish.

I don't think I've ever been to a baby shower. They don't have them in France as it's thought unlucky to buy a present for someone who's having a baby before the baby is born. I only did it once and was told in no uncertain terms to take the present back until after the event.

I noticed that there are a few new names on the thread, I really do have a lot of catching up to do.

Didn't see Wayne's name anywhere, is he still busy with all his organisations and committees?

Hubbies just made me a cuppa, so better go before it gets cold.

Will look in tomorrow!
Night all!
Catherine xx


~~~Secret Red ^^ Squirrel~~~  **007 1/2**

~~~Secret Red ^^ Squirrel~~~ **007 1/2** Report 13 May 2010 22:15

I think you're quite safe there Frank, all 3 year olds are cute :)

Cynthia

Cynthia Report 13 May 2010 22:20

I went to my one and only baby shower when I was about 12 so they have been going a long time!!! [yes, I said that Sylvia] I have a feeling I was very ill with food poisoning shortly afterwards....nice.


I quite agree about the 'wrongness' of one-up manship with people at these events - it gets totally out of control in some cases.


A close friend recently told me about meeting up with some relatives and being sickened by their materialistic outlook on life. All they could talk about was exotic houses, expensive computer equipment and gold jewellery. My friend, who rarely goes far, let alone on holiday, does not drive and has a husband who has had a stroke was glad to go home.


Hiya Catherine, 1956 then....mmm obviously a vintage year!! Wayne hasn't been here for ages....but he said he was in for a busy time and would pop in now and again. I must let him know that we are on our third thread!



Thanks for the mental image of you with blonde curly hair Frank...I shall sleep all the easier for that....what colour is it now (if any of course)?.....lol I know a young lad who has a head of blonde hair which looks as though it has never been cut since he was born.....he was recently going for a trim so I asked if he was going to have an anaesthetic!!! All good fun.


May stay around to watch Question Time but it depends who is on the panel.

Much love to all. Cx.

Sallie

Sallie Report 13 May 2010 22:57

Susan, I've been looking for your old thread for a few days.
I just can't believe that it has been deleted again. As you know I read your thread most days, and there was nothing on it that shouldn't have been. Let's hope that this one stays. I'm so glad that I've found your thread on here.

Hope Jayden is now much better and that his burns have fully healed. How is your sister-in-law getting on with her treatment? I hope all turns out well for her.

Sylvia, we didn't have baby showers in 1982 and 1985 when I had my two babies. Although , it seems to be the
'in thing ' here in the UK at the moment. I'm sorry, but I don't think much of them. As you said it's much better to give them some money or to buy one nice present.

Cynthia, Catherine, Evelyn and everyone else hope all is well with you and your families.

Love, Salliex

FRANK06

FRANK06 Report 13 May 2010 23:56

Hey Cynthia,

Just going to lay my full head of (now grey ) hair on my pillow.........and yes it is still stuck to my head ;)

Night all.

SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 14 May 2010 02:59

I have a studio photo of me somewhere, taken when I was about 18 months old

and I'm a real cutie with blond hair, and a lovely smile


at least Dad used to say it was me!!


I wish I could find it ................ I pulled it out of the album for a "send a picture of you and your wife when a young child" thingie for OH's retirement party.

Got it back, but I put it in a safe palce, instead of back into the album.

Drat, and double drat!


sylvia

Cynthia

Cynthia Report 14 May 2010 08:18

Not sure all 3 year olds are cute you know SRS lol Have you ever witnessed a fight between two warring toddlers......arghh. Think of the terrible two's......tantrums in shops and public places - the mind goes into overdrive. On photos though, yes, cute.....just like Frank. I guess we can't see the join then Frank???


I finally got round to putting together some pictures for my digital photo frame which was bought for me at Christmas. My son did the fiddly computerised bits for me and we gathered round to watch it the other night. I've tried to do it as a family tree going back to my oldest photos of great grandparents etc. I was pleased with the result and my grandson thought the one of me with curly hair was hilarious - he didn't recognise me. I had to confess that it was my first perm......my mother had a thing about curly hair............so it was a bit like 'confessions of a nana' time. I was 9 at the time by the way, not a toddler.

When we came to one when I was about 5 and he blurted out "you look like me".......bless.


Oh Sylvia, you must have the same safe hiding place I have! Let me know where it is when you find what you are looking for.


I think I am going to wash my kitchen walls this morning....how's that for excitement? Followed, perhaps, by cleaning out my little summer house where I do my ironing. I am SO gleeful at the prospect.......not.



See you later folks. Cx

Susan

Susan Report 14 May 2010 09:07

Hi Everyone

My tasks for the day have been done so I have a few minutes before I get dinner on.

Sylvia
I am always putting things in a good place then cannot remember where I put them,A day or so later I find them and say to myself ,so thats where I put it !!.
If anyone would to come in the front door and hear me talking to myself they would think I was going mad.

SRS
I agree with you three year olds are wonderful,so nice to sit and listen to them talk,so cute.
My ekdest grandaughter is a childcare worker and she loves kids ,I suppose you would have to too do the job.
Don't know if I would love them all day everyday.

Cynthia
Did you manage to find Wayno, he has been gone for a while now he must be very busy I emagine.

Salle
it"s lovely to hear from you again and yes Jayden is doing well,still wearing his presure pants and having massages with special creams to help his skin return to normal.
I think he will always have some scaring but as he grows it should look better.
My sister In law has just had her last cemo on thursday she is very sick with it but she is happy it was the last one and is keen to know when her hair is going to come back.
Anyone got any Ideas on that ?
She has to have a lot of test next week with scans and blood test to see if there is any left so we are all praying for her.

Most of you sound youger than me .I turn 60 in Sept so that has to be a big party for all to attend..

Better get dinner on ,catch you all later.
Suex

Tabitha

Tabitha Report 14 May 2010 14:23

Only a very quick visit

Nice to see you are all busy

Hope Evelyn is ok on the water

Nice to have you with us SRS - you must tell us more about your self - its good to have friends around - we are all a bit barmy on here in our own sweet ways - as you will have noticed if we still had our thread. Did I remember reading you were a maple leaf - which part do you come from - apologies if i have got it wrong - my minds going too much computer work this week - too many problems on the phone to deal with as well - too many long days - i need a weekend.

Party at Sues later on in the year then - Cynthia its your birthday soon if I remember correctly - Who is going to bring what this time?

Just had a read through of the last page or 2 - some people like to butt into things don't they - Hope that was the first & last time

Have to go only 20 min lunch today & that was a surprise as well - it was 13:50 before I realised I was starving & I have been here since 7:30 today - probably still be here at 6 again today. Its so busy.

At least the sun is shining today - take care all will pop in tomorrow.

Leona

Leona Report 14 May 2010 15:08

I would like to say a big thankyou to Cynthia for helping me out on the board, it was appreciated, and I managed to find what I wanted too! and hopefully In doing so I have managed to help someone else too

Cynthia

Cynthia Report 14 May 2010 16:14

Aw hey Leona....it was nothing....really.....My pleasure. Do feel free to join us on a regular basis. Each time somebody responds on here, Sue's helpful tips go back to the top of the board. We just chat about everyday things but some of us [no names mentioned of course] are completely crackers....lol



Right....I'm going to ask you all a question.
I have been sending out my messages to new folk for 2years or so. Today, I looked at the help board and, lo and behold there are details of how to use the message boards, find and reply to your thread etc.etc. I am pretty sure they haven't been there very long. Can anyone shed any light on this???


The gas man cometh....must make a drink for him.




SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 14 May 2010 18:48

Hi all


a lovely sunny day here :))))

Just heard from Robert ...... came out of his shell and found us gone gone gone. Hope he will be here shortly, at least for a look in


Lovley to see some new faces.


Cynthia ..... I can't say I have ever really looked at Help, so I can't say.

Like so many others, I watched the boards for some time before actually posting myself, trying to work out what to do before actually venturing on here.


off for a mooch


s
xxx

FRANK06

FRANK06 Report 14 May 2010 20:07

Cynthia,

Was that 'confessions of a nana' as in a grandma or were you just a right proper nana ;)

Is that you getting your cooker fixed at last.

One last thing dear...........You are fired !!

Anne, when I worked at the garage we were given the statutory break.............20 mins after 6 hours and that was all for an eight hour day !
Since I worked night shift alone, I didn't even bother trying to take it.

Is the BA strike causing you problems?............whoops

Cynthia

Cynthia Report 14 May 2010 21:09

Haven't heard that expression for ages Frank and yes, I'm cooking with gas!!! Such a nice man.


Poor Anne........too much work and not enough play again.


It would be nice if Robert popped in again. I have sent Wayne an email so let's see what happens.


Yep, it's my birthday at the end of May so I think we should have a 'good to be back together' party if that's ok. More nearer the time.



Seem to have been on here for ages today.....and it's only 9pm.


See you soon. Cx


Kiwibird

Kiwibird Report 15 May 2010 00:38

Hi everyone, I tried to join you all, one page back last night, I typed up my message 3 times!!! the first 2 times I pressed Reply instead of Submit so had to start again and I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SUBMIT and my stupid Anti Virus programme decided to turn my computer off. I threw my hands in the air screamed and decided it was time for bed.

Anyway here I am Saturday morning, it rained over night but has now cleared up to a beautiful sunny day.

Sylvia in answer to your question about my Grandma's wooden rolling pin it would be about 75 years old, don't tend to use it these days as I prefer my marble one when baking as it easier to clean. However the old wooden one is lighter and much easier to wield when the occasion is called for [take note Frank!]

I thought I might be the baby on this thread especially when Evelyn told us when her 1st child was born. She is old enough to be my Mother.
But was relieved to see that Catherine and I were both born in that Vintage year 1956 and Anne is even younger.

Interested to note that you all seem to be going to Baby Showers after the Birth. unless the Baby arrives early , in NZ we tend to hold our Baby Showers prior to the event and in most cases they are surprise showers with the mother- to- be unaware until she arrives to a room full of people, that happened to me before the birth of my second child.

Robert am glad that Sylvia found you Please do come out of your shell and join us I promise we won't eat you.

I was green with envy Anne when I read about that champagne Lunch aboard that new Cruise Ship, it sounds just divine. I am happy for you though, after working all these hours and dealing with all the fallout of recent times, you deserve something nice to look forward too.

Catch you all later Josie
Am going to press Submit now. As she holds her breathe!!


bega

bega Report 15 May 2010 07:20

WELL HELLOOOOO Every one,
your friend Cynthia has emailed me to inform that the thread has yet again had the gremlins in it chewing away at all your notes.

They should call it " GREMLIN"S REUNITED "

Terrible Terrible goings on from a very well known web site and number three at that, have'nt they picked up on it yet, a very slack controlling body of executive if you ask me, and also sounds like they take your moolah and run as they donot make anything here on these chat boards, they'd be lucky if the adds cover it as thread accumulation takes up room leaving minor space left to use.

well that's it said my bit

WAYNO

Susan

Susan Report 15 May 2010 07:43

Ho Everyone

Well hello Wayno,
Wonderfull to see you back and I hope you did not work too hard,has the mighty Murry got any better with the rains over your side

Yes they did delete us again,don't know why they never tell you the reason but never mind we can always regroup and start another one.

This time Wayne I think they will leave us alone as Genes said Page two of this thread they are happy for it to stay on Tips as long as we don't break the rules.

Of course we have to be carefull not to upset those that like the power trip they get out of trying to run Genes boards themselves.

Robert where are you ???don't be shy,I hope you find us again.

I have been trying to help a few this morning but it is hard when they don't give us all the info they already have !! very Frustrating !!. and when you find things they tell you they already have it !!! Growl !!!

Cold and wet today ,just litghting the fire early to snuggle down.

Catch you all later.
Suex