Genealogy Chat

Hi Sylvia.

Well, you do have a complicated one there! Makes my dilemma seem very straightforward by comparison. Thanks for the encouragement.
Jan

Jan

nothing ventured, nothing gained!

Good luck



I have a somewhat similar, yet different, problem.


We have just discovered that a very elderly (94) aunt by marriage has died ........... in late November / early December 2009


yes, I know!


She still lived in the UK, we had contact once a year at Christmas, but I heard nothing in 2009. So I asked Contrary Mary what she could find out ......... what she found set me on a hunt. The house had been sold in April last year.


Aunt had no children. We knew she had a "nephew" who helped her, but I have never in my life met anyone of her family, and she never actually said his name that I can remember. It was always "My nephew ....". I only knew he was from her side of the fmaily.

The only other relatives I have in this family who still live in England are my brother's widow, but she's 80, and lives in another town, and her daughters who live elsewhere as well.

Finally, one of my nieces wrote letters addressed to Occupant, and sent them to the 6 houses next to Aunt

One wouldn't phone niece, but got someone else to do it.

Niece emailed me with the information on Saturday ............ and I am mulling over what to do


We now know the christian name of the "nephew", but not his surname, the town he probably lives in, and a phone number for him



I would love to know exactly when my aunt died, and where she is buried.

But I am very hesitant about phoning this man ..... especially for fear that he might think I am after "inheritance" ............. it is possible that he has come in for a nice little sum, even if only from the sale of her house.

But I honestly have no interest in that.


There is the possibility of asking CM if she can find this man in the rolls, so that I could write him a letter

OR I could ask CM if she can find the name of the neighbour who wouldn't phone the neice, but was Aunt's close friend, to see what she knows.




so am continuing to mull over what to do!


sylvia

Thanks for the advice, much appreciated. i suppose if she were younger I wouldn't hesitate. having said that, she's the same age as my mother who is pretty robust. She doesn't live far away either, maybe 40 minutes drive, but not holding my breath!
Will come back and tell you what happens if anything.
regards
jan

Thanks so much M. What the heck! She might be pleased as her father (my grandfather's brother) lost touch with the rest of the family early on so she will know no-one from that side.

In fact the whole family got fragmented years ago, with almost none of the couins/2nd cousins being in touch until the last year or two. Of the seven siblings we have tracked down descendants of all but this one, and we are all in regular contact with each other. Most of us are having a big reunion in Canada in July! Not that it's of interest to you, sorry to be so boring.

I think i will send for one more cert to back up my research - just for reassurance as I know it's her really!

Thanks again for replying - wish me luck.

jan x

Hi Jan, I know how you feel! I've recently found the whereabouts of a long lost auntie that I thought had died quite a few years ago. We've had no contact for about 40 years.

I've hummed and hah-ed about how to bridge that gap - thought about sending a Christmas card with a note but bottled it!

Why don't you write a nice letter explaining that you've been researching your family and it's given an indication that she may be a cousin of your mother (you don't necessarily have to say it's your mum, you could just give your mum's name) and ask her if you're on the right track.

If she lives on her own she'd probably be pleased at you making contact.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Mx

I (with ContraryMary's help, many thanks to her!) have recently tracked down a lady I believe to be my mother's cousin. She would be about 85 years old, and is living alone. Now, there was little point in doing so if I leave it at that, but I am feeling a bit nervous about writing to her. Silly perhaps, but now it comes to it I feel in need of a bit of friendly advice/support, as I guess there are others out there who have been in the same situation. I can see no offspring so it's her or no-one.
Help!
jan