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This hobby has corrupted me!!!

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Merry Monty

Merry Monty Report 28 Jun 2006 16:04

No, NO, NO, NO Nooooooooooo! I most certainly DO NOT have enough time to drive to Oz with Kate's grocery delivery. And that's FINAL!!! (see previous page) lol Merry

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 16:07

As a GASUMP (Gimps and Slaves Union Member Paid,i am fully entitled to subcontract my services in times of severe poverty. due to a severe drop in marketing methods the FTM and compost bin income reduction means my pay has gone down,and i feel highly compromised!

Dea

Dea Report 28 Jun 2006 16:23

Know what you mean about the 'Accounts' Heather, Son (recently self-employed Plumber, has passed his on to me again + Tax Return - I have been looking at them for about 2 weeks now (They are just behind the Computer screen in a big pile!!). Got to do them one day but 'just don't seem to have the time' Funny though, I seem to be able to find 8 - 10 hours a day on here????????????? Dea x

Olgiza

Olgiza Report 28 Jun 2006 17:19

I'm certainly not corrupted by this hobby. Bankrupted and obsessed maybe. I don't mind people observing or even commenting on the dust in my lttle 'research' room... I just hate it when they start to write or doodle in it. Someone put the date 'Jan '05' just behind the 'puter screen and now there are two different levels of dust there. If we were meant to dust then the creator would have designed us with one of those extending poles with a miracle cloth on the end of it instead of one of our arms... but they didn't so we could type on the boards. Roger GC

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 17:28

Glen, you will notice that I am doing my utmost to market the Handbook 'Making easy money from Anoraks' alongside my latest mega venture 'Housewifery for Anoraks' courses. I am being slightly thwarted in this by a possible takeover bid from Olde Crone. NOW, Glen, you may think you will be better off leaving my services - however should my new business venture fail for lack of a gimp, have you SEEN (look at last nights Pallots thread) just what your employment conditions will be under O.C. as your new M.D.? AND ................how many jobs are out there for ageing freelance gimps who have lost their turnips? Eh, think about it???

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 17:36

But Heather your cut is one cert in every 4 .(think about it i'm still paying 25% on my gross earnings),and the benefit to all customers is increased hours on the pooter. We just need a snappy slogan and it's a surefire winner.

An Olde Crone

An Olde Crone Report 28 Jun 2006 17:46

Roger I totally agree - its people shifting the dust about who cause the problems - leave it alone and you can hardly notice it. I turned OFF my pooter this aft and went for a Healthy Walk to the Coop, to get some emergency bread. On the way I was thinking about housework and really feel compelled to pass on my wisdom to any Young Things who are about to embark on Domestic Bliss. When I married, my Granny took me to one side and said darkly 'It doesnt pay to be too good at anything, when you are married' I hadnt a clue what she was talking about and enthusiastically embarked on cleaning, dusting, ironing, baking, boiling, kneading, folding, drying, preserving, chopping, mincing and stuffing. I did the garden, I made all our clothes and curtains too. So occupied by all this was I, that I failed to notice Sheeshee creeping up on my blind side and my husband rapidly departed with her, not mentioning a word about my home made pasta, my home made bread and my home made knicker blinds. Husband number two departed with Tickles (or was it Cuddles?) and I sat down for a long think. One - No man ever leaves the marital home for a woman who can COOK better than you. Two - Most men actually LIKED School Dinners, and even if they didnt, they certainly ate them. You do not need to strive therefore, for any higher standard than school dinners, circa 20/30/40 years ago. Fall on your knees and praise the lord if you have a War Baby as a hubby - anything, absolutely anything, even raw potato, tastes better than snoek. Three - Tickles and Sheeshee are now ensconced in palatial homes. A cleaner comes in three times a week. Doting Old Fool pays for that of course. Sheeshee does not have a cooker so DOF takes her out for meals. All she has to do in exchange for this is to make appreciative squeaks at his prowess with the lawnmower. I no longer care about all this, its all a long time ago - but I do occasionally wish I hadnt imposed this Domestic Slavery on myself. Maybe if I hadnt, I too would be living in the lap of luxury with some DOF, who loved me for my legs, not my home made bread. OC

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 17:47

LOL

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 28 Jun 2006 18:12

Hi All What a hoot - you've had me in stitches:-) LOL I must admit that I take the helpless female approach:-) I didn't iron OH shirt properly the day after we married (17 years ago) - haven't picked up an iron since. Managed to burn his breakfast 3 days running immediately after the honeymoon - no more cooking. Blew up the hoover - once - no more hoovering - just in case:-) and I'm not even allowed to mow the grass outside as I dont do straight lines - its a hover mower for gods sake!!! With two kids, I find if I buy all the latest dusting/cleaning gadgets, they will happily use them to clean for me for weeks:-) I also have an alarm on the front door which rings every time it is opened (need to feel safe in own home:-), so am able to have a suitable page on the puter showing by the time OH/ kids arrive upstairs:-) Bev X

Snowdrops in Bloom

Snowdrops in Bloom Report 28 Jun 2006 18:15

You lot have all got it oh so wrong. Take one man Let him play cricket, rugby, golf (whatever) as much as he likes. Let him go to the pub/concert/meeting whenever they want. YOU get so much time to yourself to do all your painstaking research and..... In return ......... they are so grateful they offer to wash up/iron/cook when ever you 'don't feel like it'. Works all the time (and I mean ALL the time). Snowdrops

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 19:23

Im amazed this thread has not disappeared yet! Just to add O.C. hubby def didnt marry me for my cooking or my legs (which are like young oaks) so I guess it was the mystery of finding out what Im good at - and he is still wondering.

Michael

Michael Report 28 Jun 2006 19:29

I occasionally venture down to Tesco, to join the scrum fighting for the baguette that someone has just stuck a label on saying '7p'. So much more fun than doing it all online. And I like cooking too. Does this disqualify me?

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 29 Jun 2006 12:25

As a special advance offer i am pleased to announce the following service to GR members In my tinsel knickers of blue and green, I'll visit your house and start to clean I'll wash the floors,and iron some shirts And all for the cost of four bmd certs.

Rachel

Rachel Report 29 Jun 2006 12:26

When can you start?!!

Heather

Heather Report 29 Jun 2006 12:34

I would add, that being a benevolent employer, I am allowing Glen to freelance for a time (1 cert commission to me). Glen, you thought about subcontracting to young Michael for a bit of shopping and cooking? (You see you need an entrepreunerial brain like mine to actually make the big bucks - you wont make it alone). And what about offering the bed warming service for elderly ladies in poor health that we had a thread on about yesterday?

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 29 Jun 2006 12:37

Well you can tell i missed that thread,must have been chasing about when i missed it. Glen

Heather

Heather Report 29 Jun 2006 13:39

Ive nudged it for you glen - its the one about toy boys. Mind you at your age ....As the revered Kenny Everett said - Youre at a difficult age, too old to be a toy boy, too young to be in Status Quo

Olgiza

Olgiza Report 29 Jun 2006 13:47

I've just finished the ironing and pegged out another load of washing. Tesco's was crowded this morning but I prefer to go and get my own rather than have them deliver it because then I can put everything in the right bag so that when I get back home they are in the right place for putting away. When I got out of the shower this morning I asked my wife what she thought the neighbours would think if I walked down the road in the buff. She said, 'Easy, they'd think I married you for your money'. Got to get our lunch now, Roger GC

Heather

Heather Report 29 Jun 2006 14:15

Well Glen, looks like another possible for you to sub contract to?

Heather

Heather Report 29 Jun 2006 19:27

Erm, business seems a bit quiet Glen, mmm?