Genealogy Chat

decide to start your family tree- Good idea being new you are unsure as to what to do- understandable. Post a question in order to obtain some help - again good idea Never return, comment confirm or even admit you don't know.. WHAT IS THE POINT...?

Hi Jess Being paranoid as ever.................just check and make sure that I haven't forgotten to reply for something! I'll check my threads. Just incase .................. sorry and err thank you! Mandy

Oh dear Jess, you sound upset...........For the odd one who doesn't have the decency to say thank you...... There's an army of us who really Do appreciate what you+ others do for us. So there is a point..YOU ARE appreciated. Regards Ann

Its not the 'not saying thank you' that bothers me! Its those that post in the morning, and dont ever return or do so 3 days later and add a nugget of info that would have helped at the time. The 'post and go shopping brigade' - are they really doing this tree thing at all? Why not dedicate say, a couple of hours at a time if you do want to get anywhere Jess

couldn't agree more, Jess!! I do wonder sometimes ............ !! Joy

Hi Jess I could be partially guilty, but I tend to have about 1/2 hour in the morning and I might post a question - then I have to wait until lunchtime before I can get back - so sometimes my threads are disjointed - unfortunately I have to work and can't spend all day on the 'puter even though I'd like to. Trudy

Hi Jess Not everyone is lucky enough to be able to work on their tree all day (although like Trudy - I'd like to). Like me, I'm sure a lot of GR users have full time jobs, chores etc and sometimes cannot get around to re-posting in a matter of minutes or even on the same day. Also - I'm not sure about other people but I tend to say 'thank you' by a direct email to whoever has helped me, rather than clogging up the board. Rachel

Hi Jess And then of course there are the people who are happy to seek your help and advice, but object to you having a quiet drink in the evenings with your friends.............

Jess Try not to get irritated. I am more choosy about who I help now and am very sceptical when I see headings with 'Desperate' which go on 'I've looked everywhere'. Quite often, when you ask, they haven't actually looked anywhere. And how ever desperate they are, some of them never return to their threads. I did e-mail a couple of people privately because I thought they might not have seen their thread or be unable to find it, only to get a) no reply b) 'yes I've seen it' without a thankyou or a comment about whether or not the information was useful. I think you just have to move on, life is too short to be irritated! Thanks for all your help with my family! nell

Try not to get too irritate, Jess. I know exactly how you feel, and am getting very much like how Nell describes what she does, especially when people say they've looked everywhere when in fact that haven't (especially when you find what they're looking for on the free sites!) Chloe x

Jess I'd just like to register my THANKS for all the help you have given me lately. I hope this can make up in some part for the people who don't acknowledge your help. Lyn

EERR Jess, could you help me with the guy you found for me last week, he was the father of the woman you found the week before, after I had got everyone else to look. If you can't find him, tough, don't expect me to thank you or even respond because my name is 'IGNORANT'.!! Love Gloria

I completely understand how anyone would feel if their help isn't acknowledged and I try hard to ensure that I stay on the board for a while and get back to it when I can but I have a menopausal memory and I do forget sometimes. I also have to go away for days at a time and then find that someone has answered my query whilst I was away. I just hope that I haven't offended anyone that has tried to help me. I have had only one or two who haven't responded when I have tried to help them and I tend to think they have had 'senior moments' like mine! My other problem is that whithout broadband in our village, moving around the site takes an age and I sometimes just run out of time. Ever onwards Sylvie

Yep - Couldnt agree with you more Jess. I would not dream of posting a request for help , on the thread boards, then buggering off - Its very rude. Most people know that these threads are fast moving and you will ALWAYS get a reply well within the hour. I dont very often help people on the threads anymore as it is so frustrating.Also, when you get a reply 3 days later, you tend to wonder what the hell they are talking about! I now help people on the 'Trying to find ' board instead. That is my opinion for what its worth! Kim xx (Catch you for a saucer of something tasty later!!!)

Here's another tip. click onto a unsuspecting newbie who offers a spare credit or two. Only to use up 16 or more. Sorry moan over

Look out now Jess, remember the thread I started.... what was it called now?? We all got accused of moaning about newbies.. Which I wasn't, and the thread was removed! As we all know, it doesn't just take a lack of experience in this field to be rude & ignorant, names I see time & time again are guilty too. Get the wine out Jess, and a big bar of choccy, thanks for all your help :) As chilled out as I am (well sometimes) I helped someone out a lot... and I mean A LOT. Used loads of 1837 credits, got even more info than they actually asked for, I thought they'd be so excited, and waited for them to check back. You've guess it...NOWT! I sent a message 2 days later..... NOWT Lo & Behold, last week, 6 weeks after they'd posted, I get 'Hi could I have the info you mentioned!! PHHHUULLLLLEEEEEAAAAASSSSSEEEEE!!! You're 'avin' a larf! I told them I deleted the lot when they showed no interest. Childish, Mmmm... It made ME feel better though :) Sam

Hi Jess, I might of been guilty when i first came on to community, i have been a member since october but only discovered this part in feb, i just didn't know how to work the board at all. I now try and thank everyone concerned and put a little help back to someone else, and only by what i have learned from this 'community' can i do so. I have tried to help people to find someone but i take hours, and by the time i have found who they are looking for, its too late somebody else has found about 10 generations to my one name, so i know just how hard it must be to do lookups, when i got my first help, off i went to search through my files to match my names together i was so excited, it wasn't until i was on this site for a few hours that i realised that people could reply,and now i try to make sure thanks are said ASAP MOE! ps thanking you all on behalf of my rellies who don't want to be found but you lot ferreted them out for me!

Thanks for the private messages folk- this wasn't 'aimed' at anyone..... I am not suggesting anyone should spend all day at a computer or Knocking those that have to go to work/do housework/pick up the kids from school . What i am saying is this - If you are going to do it, then you need to put in more than 5 mins once a week to post a question! I , amongst others, can spend an age looking for things for people, really sifting thru info with a fine toothcomb only to find that if I (or we) have to ask a question to enable us to be sure in our findings that no-one answers.

Hi Nita Recognise me? How's the house! You may think you are a newbie, but you and I on that course on Monday night could have taught that tutor a considerable amount. So what does that make him? Do hope he doesn't read this, because I'm sure he was a genuine sort of chap and meant well, but honestly, 'beyond the novice'. Believe me, the highlight of the evening which he saved up specially for us, was 1837online! And no warnings about some of the total rubbish on the IGI. Sorry, I certainly don't think I know it all - far from it, which was why I went on the course. But it was a farce. The other friend who came on it went home half way through - he couldn't stand it any longer. Still, Nita and I met in person for the first time, so it was worth the effort. Sorry Jess, didn't mean to take over your thread, just got carried away. Complaining about someone who only wanted to help me. Oh dear, got that wrong, haven't I!

LOL Sarah!!! But what does ****** mean? You could give us a first letter at least! Come On - Give Us A Clue! (Sounds Like........)