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narcissistic mothers

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

SueMaid

SueMaid Report 29 Jun 2012 11:30

Something that may be of interest in an Aussie newspaper.

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/mother-loses-all-rights-to-sickly-children-after-showing-signs-of-munchausen-syndrome-by-proxy/story-e6freuy9-1226409611274

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

Sharron

Sharron Report 29 Jun 2012 09:03

Many counsellors don't know what they are dealing with, it is such a secret form of abuse,

I just hope I am doing a bit of good by trying to make it as publicly known as possible. The more people who know it exists, the less oportunity to keep it secret.

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 29 Jun 2012 03:39

I saw a counsellor just after my mother died.

She didn't help much.

Every time I started to talk about things that had happened, she interupted and starting talking about what happened to HER!

So I had to pay to listen to her. I hope I helped :-) Maybe I should have sent her a bill.

JustDinosaurJill

JustDinosaurJill Report 28 Jun 2012 15:32

Scozz. The breakthrough for me was an internet friend actually asking me if I realised I was presenting as a typical abuse victim. She also pointed me in the direction of some things to read about like the various personality disorders. It was as though all the responsibility and all the blame was taken off my shoulders. Not one bit of it was my fault.

I will never be the person I could have been had I not lived my life in fear. I'm not the brightest star in the Galaxy but if I had been able to learn freely and to even be allowed to have my own thoughts and opinions, without fear of words from him or a beating from my sibling, maybe I could have achieved more than I have. But it went beyond that to being totally controlled and still a level of control continued right up until I walked away.

And walking away and not giving into the threats hubby and I received - the consequences if we failed to obey made me the strong one. No one before or afterwards ever stood up to him.It made him unable to control and his already paranoid hatred of me just exploded. And then, after his death my abusive sibling who had come back on the scene and played the nice kind sibling and fooled me totally, went back to her true self. She only pretended to be nice to get her hands on all the money. Nearly the last time we spoke, she made it very clear that we are nothing to her and never will be.

And the only part of that I am to blame for is my own stupidity at being taken in by her.

I've moved on as much as it is possible to. What is left to me is to work through, and come to terms with is knowing only some of the lies they told relatives and neighbours (some refuse to speak to me now), the absolute denial of the years I spent looking after them (regardless of nurses and doctors and surgery receptionists as witnesses), doing everything I could to make their lives easier, including subsidising their income. The female parent even accused me of illtreating her to my face, in the presence of my cousins. In fact my sibling now also denies that she stayed away and let me do it all. According to her, she was exhausted after spending years looking after them

Some days, when I'm off-guard the feeling of total betrayal sneaks up on me. It's hard to deal with because I will never understand how I deserved to be treated that way.

I am so lucky to have hubby. Without him and his love and strength and the happy life we have together, I would probably drown emotionally. Every day I tell my kids how much I love them. I can't imagine ever doing to them what was done to me <3.

I am proof that all this cr*p can happen and you can survive and be happy.

J

MargarettawasMargot

MargarettawasMargot Report 28 Jun 2012 12:36

Gentle hugs to Jillian, Val, Sharon,and for anyone who needs them,to soothe away the hurt and pain that you all have suffered.

Take care,stay strong,

Margot.xx <3 <3 <3 <3

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 28 Jun 2012 11:35

scary stuff. I think those who had a "normal" childhood are in the minority.

I grew up thinking I was ugly, because I was told it often enough. I'm no Miss Universe, but I'm not that scary looking. OH thinks I'm gorgeous, and that's what counts <3

When you realise what happend to you as a child was NOT your fault, that's the day you start to let go of it all. But it never leaves completely.

Sharron

Sharron Report 28 Jun 2012 11:09

I have just read through some of these posts and I am crying again but it is a good cry. It is not the tight ,angry ,frustrated crying that filled so much of my life but a letting go cry.

It is that article that I have to thank for this and I hope it helps others on here to reach a point of crying like this.

None of us deserve any of this.