General Chat

Top tip - using the Genes Reunited community

Welcome to the Genes Reunited community boards!

  • The Genes Reunited community is made up of millions of people with similar interests. Discover your family history and make life long friends along the way.
  • You will find a close knit but welcoming group of keen genealogists all prepared to offer advice and help to new members.
  • And it's not all serious business. The boards are often a place to relax and be entertained by all kinds of subjects.
  • The Genes community will go out of their way to help you, so don’t be shy about asking for help.

Quick Search

Single word search

New Military Records

New military records

Was your ancestor a war hero?

View thousands of brand new military records, including Chelsea Pensioner records, Military Nurses, Prisoners of war and much more.

View military records today

Icons

  • New posts
  • No new posts
  • Thread closed
  • Stickied, new posts
  • Stickied, no new posts

I feel it's time for a joke....................

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Teresa L.A.

Teresa L.A. Report 10 Jun 2008 13:16





The jury of 12 women was out for about a minute to decide this one . . . . .

Subject: Power Outage during a mamogram


I actually kept my mammogram appointment. I was met with, "Hi! I'm Belinda!" This perky clipboard carrier smiled from ear to ear, tilted her head to one side and crooned, "All I need you to do is step into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on this gown.

Everything clear?

I'm thinking, "Belinda, try decaf. This ain't rocket science."

Belinda skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors.

With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and said, "Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and lean in a tad so we can get everything?'

Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised, and out of air, so why not use the remaining circulation in my legs and neck and finish me off?

My body was in a holding pattern that defied gravity (with my other boob wedged between those two 4 inch pieces of square glass) when we heard, then felt a zap! Complete darkness and the power went off!

"Oh, maintenance is working. Bet they hit a snag." Belinda headed for the door.

"Excuse me! You're not leaving me in this vise alone are you?" I shouted.

Belinda kept going and said, "Oh, you fussy puppy...the door's wide open so you'll have the emergency hall lights. I'll be right back."

Before I could shout "NOOOO!" she disappeared.

And that's exactly how Bubba and Earl, maintenance men extraordinaire, found me, half-naked and part of me dangling from the Jaws of Life, and the other part smashed between glass!

After exchanging polite "Hi, how's it going " type greetings, Bubba (or possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off.

Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible "Uh, yes, yes I did thanks."

"You bet, take care" Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though I'd been standing in the line at the grocery store.

Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin. Making no attempt to suppress her amusement, she said, "Oh I am sooo sorry!" The power came back on and I totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. Are we upset?"

And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps....

**







~~~Foxylady (with silverhair)~~~

~~~Foxylady (with silverhair)~~~ Report 10 Jun 2008 13:56

pmsl :)))))))
Sue

But it does hurt!

Teresa L.A.

Teresa L.A. Report 10 Jun 2008 13:57

So they tell me Baroness, I haven't had one yet, what age should you start having them?

JustKaz

JustKaz Report 10 Jun 2008 14:02

pmsl, thats cheered me up, been a bit dicky today..........
xxxxxxx

Jane

Jane Report 10 Jun 2008 18:08

I think it depends on how big your boobs are .I found it more uncomfortable than painful,just rather undignified>
.I had to tiptoe too.!!!

Stephanie

Stephanie Report 10 Jun 2008 21:04

You're right, Helen. Uncomfortable and undignified - but need to do it. Wonder why we have to stand on tiptoe though?

Steph x

~~~Foxylady (with silverhair)~~~

~~~Foxylady (with silverhair)~~~ Report 11 Jun 2008 10:20

Prehaps they don't make allowancies for the shorter woman, when they make the machines!!!

Sue