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Clearing out mum's stuff and came across this:

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 3 Mar 2013 16:49

THE VALUE OF OLD AGE

Remember, old folks are worth a fortune -
With silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys and gas in their stomachs

I have become a little older since I last wrote to you and changes have come into my life.

I am quite a frivolous old girl now and I am seeing five gentlemen each day

As soon as I wake up Will Power helps me out of bed

Then I visit Lou

Next its time for Mr. Quaker to give me my oats.

They leave, and Arthur Ritis shows up and stays with me for the rest of the day.

He doesn’t stay in one place, he takes me from joint to joint.

After such a busy day, I am ready for bed with Johnny Walker

What a life! And oh yes, I have started flirting with Al Zymer.

The Vicar came the other day and said "at your age your should be thinking of the hereafter"

I told him "I do, no matter where I am, in the lounge or in the bedroom, in the kitchen or in the cellar, I ask myself - now what am I in here after?"



JustGinnie

JustGinnie Report 3 Mar 2013 16:52

Great stuff, :-D :-D.

AnnMarieG

AnnMarieG Report 3 Mar 2013 16:52

That made me smile :-D :-D

ButtercupFields

ButtercupFields Report 3 Mar 2013 16:54

Oh my, Maggie, I can relate to most of that! :-D :-D <3

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 3 Mar 2013 16:56

...then I came across this!!! :-S :-0

MY DAY OF YOUTH
My day of youth is over
My torch of life is out
What used to be my sex appeal is now my water spout

Time was when, of its own accord
T’would from my trousers spring
For now I have a full time job
To find the bloody thing

It used to be embarrassing
For early every morning
It stood and watched me shave

But now with old age approaching
It sure gives me the blues
To see it’s withered head
And watch me clean my shoes

ChrisofWessex

ChrisofWessex Report 3 Mar 2013 16:57

Maggie they both made me laugh :-D

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 3 Mar 2013 17:02

They made me smile too :-D :-D

...bit surprised by the second one though :-D

♥†۩ Carol   Paine ۩†♥

♥†۩ Carol Paine ۩†♥ Report 3 Mar 2013 17:05

:-D

Eeyore13

Eeyore13 Report 3 Mar 2013 17:09

:-D

OneFootInTheGrave

OneFootInTheGrave Report 3 Mar 2013 17:10

Hilarious - but so true :-D :-D :-D

Glad I read them before the itchy finger appears ;-)

ButtercupFields

ButtercupFields Report 3 Mar 2013 17:13

Wonder who the second one was about...Will or Arthur :-D :-D :-D

maggiewinchester

maggiewinchester Report 3 Mar 2013 17:27

:-D

AnninGlos

AnninGlos Report 3 Mar 2013 17:30

:-D :-D

PricklyHolly

PricklyHolly Report 3 Mar 2013 18:02

Brilliant Maggie.

:-D :-D :-D

Wend

Wend Report 3 Mar 2013 18:58

Just spluttered on me V & T :-D :-D :-D

Mersey

Mersey Report 3 Mar 2013 19:11

:-D :-D

Kay????

Kay???? Report 3 Mar 2013 19:47

:-D :-D :-D.

what a sense of humor my kinda lady. ;-)