General Chat

I put up a thread on genealogy . I had not much information as I was trying to help a friend who I thought may have a link with my family. Jax glitterbaby and Rose were great to say what little info I could give but I felt well told off by the other person who asked why when I appeared to be a competent member of genes was I asking for help. I put up why, stating that I have eye problems and cannot stay on the computer long. However, when I looked today at the offending piece I see it has been removed whether by the person or someone else I have no idea. :-|

disgraceful

some just like to moan

so keep your chin up hun :-D :-D

Rise above it - they were probably just having a bad day!

Thanx all. It was like a slap in the face with a wet haddock. Then I looked at the others and felt uplifted. :-) ;-) oops when I winked I couldn't see anything at all :-D

Ignore it Elaine and don't let it put you off. We all need help sometimes

Elaine, if it's the person I think it is, I have noticed on several occasions that they can be very acerbic in their responses, which must be so off-putting for new members. The person appears to be quite an experienced genealogist and should know better. Learning some good manners wouldn't go amiss either.

I'm very pleased you had help from a few more pleasant members ;-) :-)

An utter disgrace.

We all need help from time to time no matter how long we have been at this Family History game.

Even more so if we hit a brick wall and need some fresh eyes on the subject.

We have all been there, looking at the information but it just does not register!!!

Ignore any bad comments you do what you want not what others think you should do. <3 ;-)

You should have given this person a tongue lashing , who the hell do these lot think they are :-

George :-)

I did think the comment was uncalled for....but it is a usual response from the said member...just ignore it

Elaine

As already said keep posting when you need help.

I have had brilliant help on this site from many members.

Maureen

I saw the response and thought it was uncalled for. Just ignor it and continue as you think fit

Wendy

I sympathise with you for your eye problems Elaine, it's not always easy to stay on and look at records, especially if some of them are in different format or text size. Even though you can enlarge text it is sometimes a strain on the eyes.

Doesn't matter how competent or experienced one is we all need help sometimes, I looked for ages to find someone on a census , with all variants, and 'had' to ask for help, eventually someone cracked it by finding a wild mis-transcription. I 'might' have got it eventually, but then again I might have still been looking.

I thought that's why we are all on here to help each other out....silly me to get it wrong! :-S

Elaine I have chatted to some really lovely people since I joined GR. They have always been very kind and helpful giving advice in a friendly supportive way. I have also seen comments made by some people who are far more knowledgeable on the subject than I am, whose remarks have been nasty spiteful and totally unnecessary. I just take note of this sort of attitude, as I do in life, and think that some people have no manners or respect for others opinions. I hope that you continue researching your family history, I am discovering so much about mine and find it fascinating. Rise above it you are the better person.


Paula :-D

I don't think it matters if you have eye problems or not, no-one should feel intimidated to give reasons for asking for help whether they are experienced or not....two heads better than one and all that. Thank goodness there are some level headed down to earth members on here who don't use their expertise as a reason to belittle others.

A few weeks ago I posted a request on Living Relatives looking for long lost Cousins and their families. 3 Members responded helpfully but the fourth gave me a real ear bashing for something which I had innocently included in my request. I immediately deleted my post.

I now no longer post on Living Relatives for fear of saying the wrong thing and getting another ear bashing.

Now Robert you've been on this site since 2007 so you will no doubt know there are Some Cranky folks here (but loads of nice ones) so you don't let anyone put you down this site is for everyone to get help / encouragement / enjoyment ect. so go on get asking your questions please :-)

I've known VERY experienced helpers ask for help and advice on the boards.


Even JC who, most people on here would admit, is the best . had threads up occasionally, just to see if anyone could spot something she may have missed.


What I find interesting, is that the comment was deleted. It's almost as though someone can't help but give curt replies and then realise that they shouldn't have said whatever it was and so deletes it. Possibly, whilst they are quick to hand criticism out, they are terrified of receiving it back.


I'd be tempted to reply something to the effect of ......

"Thank you for your extremely rude and critical comment 'xxxxxxxxxx' but, if you don't mind, I will take the advice of the friendlier members on here for a more balanced view of things".


Please don't be put off asking for help......anyone :-)

I got told off by another member for putting information about someone I was trying to find on the FindLiving Relatives board.
How else are you going to ask for help? "I am looking for someone but can't tell you their name or where they were last known"
At the third attempt when I asked again a very kind person gave me a lead to them through their bridge club membership !
I've been doing genealogy for over a decade and am almost a founding member of GR, but that one had defeated me for several years.