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A few jokes..............

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

MR_MAGOO

MR_MAGOO Report 27 May 2013 15:08

Due to a water shortage in Ireland, Dublin swimming baths have announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8.

Paddy thought his new girlfriend might be the one but after looking through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's outfit, a French maids outfit, and a police womans uniform, he finally decided if she can't hold down a job, she's not for him.

Paddy is doing some roofing work for Murphy, He nears the top of the ladder and starts shaking and going dizzy. He calls down to Murphy and says "I think I will have to go home, I've come all over giddy and feel sick." Murphy asks "A yer got vertigo?" Paddy replies "No I only live round the corner."

After 100 years lying on the sea bed, Irish divers were amazed to find that the Titanics swimming pool was still full.

There's two more.........if you want to see them it's by PM ;-) ;-)

:-D ;-) :-D ;-)

OneFootInTheGrave

OneFootInTheGrave Report 27 May 2013 15:20

:-D :-D :-D ;-)

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 27 May 2013 15:23

:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

Sharron

Sharron Report 27 May 2013 15:56

Did you notice there was no Irish fencing team in the Olympics last year?



Ran out of creosote.

Mersey

Mersey Report 27 May 2013 15:56

:-D :-D :-D

MR_MAGOO

MR_MAGOO Report 27 May 2013 16:43

:-D :-D.....Sharron.

Dermot

Dermot Report 27 May 2013 17:22

Sean Murphy applied for a tree lopping vacancy.

"What experience of tree felling have you had", the interviewer enquired.

"Well, my last job was in the Sahara & that lasted 15 years" replied a confident Sean.

"But there are no trees in the Sahara", interjected the curious interviewer.

"Well begorrah, there's none there now, sir!" was Sean's confident reply.

Dermot

Dermot Report 27 May 2013 17:31

Due to H&S, the Irish Rail Union has prohibited its drivers from testing the new driverless trains.

Bobtanian

Bobtanian Report 27 May 2013 18:22

Paddy came home to find his wife in bed with his friend

"What's going on here Paddy exclaimed"!

See she said to her lover, now we both know he's stupid!

MR_MAGOO

MR_MAGOO Report 27 May 2013 18:29

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake?

One less drunk.

Bobtanian

Bobtanian Report 27 May 2013 18:32

Keith and his mate Ron were playing a quick round of golf, but were slowed down by two lady players in front,so Keith goes to ask the ladies if he and Ron could "play through" but returned visibly shaken, "you'll never believe this Ron, but one of them is my wife and the other my bit on the side"...........Ron, looking at his watch said "not to worry, I'll go and ask them"...............a few minutes later he returned and said

"Keith you aint gonna believe this...................."

MR_MAGOO

MR_MAGOO Report 27 May 2013 18:40

:-D :-D.....Bob.

MR_MAGOO

MR_MAGOO Report 27 May 2013 18:53

How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

"Never mind we'll drink in the dark!"

Dermot

Dermot Report 27 May 2013 20:01

These jokes have a certain kind of pulpit elequence. A sense of humour, they used to call it.

The downside is that too much laughing mists up my glasses.

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 28 May 2013 01:33

waiting for some eejit to say this is racist :-(

Won't be me, and I have a couple of teaspoons of Irish blood.



:-D

Have you heard the Irish Knock Knock joke?

No?

You start............

CupCakes

CupCakes Report 28 May 2013 08:34

Why has terryj 's post been refered - some people obviously don't agree with him but we live in a county where freedom of speech prevails

JustJohn

JustJohn Report 28 May 2013 09:21

These threads always get reported, NanaSue. I think it is because almost all jokes make fun of others. Whether in is their nation, their skin colour, their disability.

And jokes we find funny in a private group seem to prove offensive to some Genes members. And it must be difficult for the reviewer not to uphold the complaint (which the rules demand) whilst laughing her or his head off.

Cruel world :-S

ஐ+*¨^¨*+e+*¨^¨*+ஐ Mildred Honkinbottom

ஐ+*¨^¨*+e+*¨^¨*+ஐ Mildred Honkinbottom Report 28 May 2013 10:27

:-D :-D :-D copied some of them for FB :-D :-D :-D

Still laughing :-D

CupCakes

CupCakes Report 28 May 2013 10:39

:-D :-D :-D lol :-D :-D :-D

terryj

terryj Report 28 May 2013 12:56

blimmey i have been reported for saying i'm suprised this thread hasnt been reported
life gets stranger