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It's only a chat room

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 15:07

Said my friend...

Bit long winded, but bear with me :-D

I have a friend who used to use GR back in about 2009, she is still a member, but not a paying one, so she can still look in, which she does very infrequently. A couple of weeks back when we met up, we were taking genealogy, and GR came up, she said she was thinking about being a paying member again, she said would have a look in to see what it had on offer, I saw her today, and asked if she was joining again, in a nut shell this is what she said....

She started off looking in on here, and said she couldn't believe the amount of twaddle that went on, when I asked was there a particular twaddle she meant, she said the bickering, the sniping, the he said, she said, the innuendo's of if someone had done or got something, but others didn't believe them, why on earth did they worry about it? Felicity from Falmouth, could really be Gertie from Grantham, so who really knows who anyone is, or what they have done? She also said do members realise that there are people looking in from all over the world, who must laugh there socks off at the goings on, or that there are people who don't have much going on in there life, who must look in and despair. So she won't be joining chat.

So what I did was have a look on chat, as though I was thinking of joining, and you know what I agree with my friend.

Why not try to look in as though you were thinking of joining, and see what you think?

I haven't put this up to start a ruck, I'm not bothered, GR isn't a big part of my social life, but realise that there are some people whom it may be, and they must be miserable at what they see. I've only put this up to see what others think.



Lyndi Report 10 Jun 2013 15:10

I agree with you both Lynda - it just beggars belief at times. :-D


eRRolSheep Report 10 Jun 2013 15:15

To be honest it seems like the Garden of Eden compared to many sites I am a member of.

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 10 Jun 2013 15:18

Lynda, I was talking about the internet generally yesterday to Dan as he asked if there was "anything interesting on GR", cutting a long story short I came to the conclusion that there wasn't too much but that it applied to many sites where people chat.

Aside from the really useful sites, and searches, and 'educational' value of being able to google just about anything you want to know, I wonder if chat on the internet has actually passed it's peak? and has become jaded by familiarity? Maybe communicating more 'off line' or 'off mobile' will soon be back in fashion?

Nolls from Harrogate

Nolls from Harrogate Report 10 Jun 2013 15:25

I agree with you Lynda - take everything as a pinch of salt and go on to the next thread and stop worrying as to the whos whys and wherefores ....does that make sense or am I rambling again if so put it down to my age ! :-S


SheilaWestWilts Report 10 Jun 2013 15:30

Lynda, I think your friend is correct and that you should buy her a drink :-D


Joeva Report 10 Jun 2013 15:33

Make that a double Lynda ! :-D :-D :-D


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 16:07

Lyndi, so it's not just my friend and me then, good :-D

The familiarity aspect is a thought Rose, I do think it's cliquey on here at times, well that's what it looks like to me anyway.:-D

You're not rambling away Nolls, I understand you, so you're alright :-D

Sheila & Jo, perhaps I'll start a whip round for my friend, looks like she could have a good night out on the proceeds, only if she takes me with her though :-D

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 10 Jun 2013 16:23

You would rarely find the mix of people in a room together that you find in the 'chat room ' on here, and it's bound to cause friction at times, yes you can avoid individuals but that in itself causes tension, because you may want to post a reply to the topic but have to avoid the person.

Re cliques I have been in so many, often at the same time on 'allegedly' opposing sides ( I think I was even in Lynda's 'clique' at some time lol) , so I don't give much heed to that now. Except that I was 'advised' to consider whether I was "mixing with the wrong people" recently lolol. Given that I know none of them beyond the barest of details I'm afraid I ignored that too.

The more people post the more chance of finding something that interests or cheers you, so it really is down to members to add something if they don't like what's there... hence I posted the beaches thread because I thought it was a topic that anyone could join in on, whatever their differences or who they knew or didn't know :-) My 'bread bin' thread was a good one too ;-)


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 16:48

Being honest, there are people's threads I ignore, some because of past history, I have a looooong memory, and some because I know before long, there will be a snide remark.

I like the one off thread, or the pop in/out threads best.

As for mixing with the "wrong" mob, I've mixed with the wrong mob a lot of life, so they are not wrong to me, so I speak to anyone, well nearly anyone ;-)


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 20:25

Bit of an update * friend rang to say she has read my post, and has noted that Sheila & Jo, reckon I should buy her a drink, thanks ladies :-D


Mayfield Report 10 Jun 2013 20:50

Spot on Lynda!

I haunt several other boards mostly trade or hobby ones and while discussions sometimes get heated I think Genes is the worst.

Part of the problem is the ease with which posts can be removed. Other boards edit racist, homophobic, pornographic and similar posts but if somebody has a personal problem with another member they have to contact the provider and explain the problem before action is taken.


StrayKitten Report 10 Jun 2013 20:50

i agree the snipping even puts me off, and lets face it, if im honest i used to love a good snipe, ;-)

its a bit stale for me now tho, same old, most day,

i must have grew up or got boring :-P


Lyndi Report 10 Jun 2013 20:50

:-D :-D :-D
Best you do it then Lynda ;-) :-)


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 21:08

Mayfield, I also flit about on other sites, and think the sniping is worse here at time, maybe as Rose said, people have got too familiar :-S

Stray, as you get older you get wiser :-D Stale is a good word for what appears to be happening.

Lyndi, I am next week :-D


StrayKitten Report 10 Jun 2013 21:19

;-) i think your right, plus i have a life now, that helps too lol, :-D


AnninGlos Report 10 Jun 2013 21:19

It does seem to have deteriorated in the past nine months or so, these days people get very personal with their comments which would not have happened in the past when your friend was a member. It is very like the playground sometimes and people seem unable to let go of any perceived slight and grudges are held. The persistent reporting of posts doesn't help either.

However, many years back, before the big upset, resulting in the split when a rival site set up, we had some really nasty upsets which would have put off any prospective member, we recovered from that. There are those of us who hold back and don't get involved and who still manage to enjoy friendships on here.

So buy your friend a drink and encourage her to return and sort us out Lynda. :-D


~Lynda~ Report 10 Jun 2013 21:27

Good for you Stray, nice one ;-)

Will do Ann :-D

Hayley   Empress of Drama

Hayley Empress of Drama Report 10 Jun 2013 21:35

I dont mind looking in on here whilst there is sniping going on, I hate it when its been going on for hours and I havent a clue what people are sniping about. :-D

I dont mind the cliques providing they are willing to allow anyone to join in
, I remember once as a newby 2 people talking over not must mine but many others heads and I thought it was jolly well rude :-|

For some reason I am having a job to sign in to GR but I think its me rather then them, however when I looked in last night before I went to bed I couldnt believe that some people must of been sat in front of their PC's morning till night for most of the weekend, :-0 after the lovely weekend we have had, I thought to myself turn it off and get some fresh air, however I will hold my hands up that once I was addicted to this site, but there seem to loads of stuff going on then I was scared of missing owt :-D


George Report 10 Jun 2013 21:47

Evening all :-D

I joined GR back in 2009 because an old mate of mine Foggs, said there are some really great people on here who are great fun, so I joined.
The first few months were great, plenty of laughs and fun. then all the nastiness started, so I left.
I came back because again he told me most of that crap had finished and it was good again.
Even he has now left earlier this year.!!!!!
It is such a shame that all the kids cant play nicely.