General Chat

Afternoon All....

Hope everyone is feeling ok today.

Dave...well done you, that would have been really hard for me to do too n know exactly where you're coming from in saying you felt like everyone was looking as you as soon as you walked in. I pulled out of my wedding to my ex (good job too!!) for that reason....I felt sick n panicked everytime I thought about standing up in front of everyone n having them all look at ME...!!...so scary. Hope you get a result :o)

Am having another 'Good Day'....2 on the trot...can't be bad. Wont pull out of appointment Thursday tho cos I know unless I get some help my 'Good Days' will soon be outweighed by the 'Bad Days.

Have arranged for another walk tomorrow night with the girl next door so that'll be good.

Patricia....have Pm'd you in response to your reply. Some of it I will copy below for others to read....hope it helps n makes some kind of sense. It's just how I see things when I have a clear head on..!!

'' can understand fully what your saying, often people think that a mother on anti-depressants is an unfit mother....but infact it's quite the opposit. It shows a woman with alot on her plate, understanding & seeking the help she requires to be able to function properly for herself & her family....there's nothing wrong with that. We all have to admit we need help from time to time which is what I didn't do until this thread was started............but since then I have felt so much better, knowing I'm not alone in my, sometimes, black cloud. Even tho I'm feeling better I'm still going because I know unless I really do something about it it won't last. The thought of self harming frightens me, have been there n done it n it didn't get me anywhere ''

Have a good evening everyone....

Julie :o)xxxx

Hello everyone, I haven't been on today as my chemo tablets are making me very nausious, and I have been in so much pain with my back and legs I didn't know where to put myself. I've just popped on to see how everyone is doing and I have been thinking of you all.
Well done Dave, that is my trouble, even worse now with the way I walk and hospital waiting rooms are always full, uggghhh.
Glad to see you are still positive Jules and I will look forward to hearing how you go on.

Caz xxx

Oh poor you Caz - are you OK just sitting by the computer or is it too painful for you? I think we'll have to organise a coach trip together - boy what a laugh we would all have, d'you think? If only I could win bigtime on the lorrery I'd take us all on a cruise

Hi Both....

We can dream can't we Ann....lol....where would you take us...??

Caz......sorry to hear you're not good today. You're such an inspiration to others.

{{{{Gentle Hugs}}}}

xxx

thanks everyone for the support and PMs its so good to see people slowly making small positive steps forward i learned taking a huge great leap one day setting big goals for the next few days overdoes it, you drop back again feeling like you failed. for me small steps to no timetable work better. going for a walk to the shop sounds good but too big a goal for me but if i get my coat on and leaving the front door i am happy....... getting as far as the postbox im chuffed. half way and a smile at a passer by is just as much a step forward and theres always another day.
take heart everyone lets take a few small steps together........ followed by a huge group hug
Pat

That group hug sounds good Pat!

a cyber hug for all and a world cruise for all if the lottery numbers come up!! If only

first of all i want to thank ann for sponsoring me i really appreciate it
now about the dr i went this afternoon and he as given me two lots of tablets the only thing is i am scared to take them i keep thinking i don't need them but i know i do if that makes sense
thank you all


carolina xx

No it does not make sense young lady - you start taking them NOW or I'll haunt you and so will the rest of us!!! They will probably take a few days before they kick in but you should soon be feeling the benefit - I would not manage without my tablets and I am sure everyone else on here who takes them will tell you the same. If you find they don't agree with you go back to your GP and explain why - I was given Seroxat once and was awake all flippin' night - so he changed them. now you will be nagged and nagged until you tell us you are taking them, and you will also be receiving rather a lot of pm's. Got that!!

Love Ann XXX [it was a pleasure to sponsor you]

ann i haven't been called young or a lady in a long time come to think about it i have never been called a lady thank you

carolina xx

well you have now - you take heed of what I've said - I'm old enough to be your mother I'm sure I must be obeyed!!

ok ok i will

carolina xx

I'll be checking!!!!

Need to check in,


Bad memories linked to my state of mind brought back,


Love and night to you all,


Caz xxxx

Dave congratulations on your job interview. Even if you don't get a second one you did well to go. Now you know you can do it! Good luck x

Carolina hope your appointment with doctor wasn't too hard for you, I know what you mean about not taking the tablets, at first I put mine on the table and couldn't believe I was back on them! I felt sick at the thought of swallowing them. But hey I did and after a few weeks of antidepressants and diazapam began to pick up. Slept loads at first during the day, couldn't sleep at night!! Take them Carolina you know it's for the best xxxx

Caz sorry to hear how poorly you feel today. How often are you having your chemo? My friend has it on a Tuesday for three weeks then a week off, this is for three months I think she said. She has cancer of the pancreas and knows she is termianl. They are trying to give her more time. Hope tomorrow is better for you xxxx

Pat you are so right, little steps and a day at a time. Set yourself a little target you can't fail and make it a little harder weekly. Don't expect too much too soon.
One day you will suprise your self doing something you couldn't have done a month ago!!

Jules whooo!! Two good days. What ever next :o) enjoy your walk with neighbour tomorrow xxx

hi liz mmm the old specialist you sometime got to wounder? expert= ex is a has been+spert a drip under pressure. My son has a streched bowel which he got his first year of school (never had a problem toilet training) happy little kid. starts school before the end of the year starts messing himself at the same time my dad dying of lung cancer (dad and him very close) so think its stress happen's more often ,off to the doctors constipation.medication didn't work (3 months later after this and that off to the first specialist only to be told this sometime happens he will grow out of it) he's now 14y and still has the problem and yes we have been to another spec even a stay in hospital nothing worked mean while school became a living hell for him grade 6 off to see head master because they think darren has behaver problems theres an anger management problem (only I had been asking them for help for the passed year) off loadend him of to high school two years in high an I've had engough today is our first day of home schooling wish me luck he's a good kid and all I got out of the second spec this didn't happen over night its not going to get fixed over night well DA! we have a good doctor now and his pyc thinks home schooling for 12 month is a good idea which serprised me ! so we are off down a new path and all I can say is thank god I've got my happy pills because I know I couldn't cope without them (my grandma died of bowel cancer and my mum had her bowel removed 4y before dad died we almost lost her my older sister has bowel problems and I've been checked for ulcers of the bowel can be a cause of low iron but I've got the all clear so thats part of my story

Dave WELL DONE I had panic acc after a car acc for a while evertime I got in the car my heart would race well you know the feelling my heart go's out to you! All I can say is Iam gland I got over it we live in the country I just had to drive the car. talk yourself though it step by step you've done it now you can do it again WELL DONE!

Hi everyone, been reading all your posts and can relate to loads of things people have been saying.
i was diagnosed with clinical depression after i had to leave the home i had lived in for 27 years due to a veryviolent son (long story) i was so scared of him that i wouldnt tell anyone where i had moved to so i was very isolated because i didnt want to talk to any of the neighbours in case they asked why we had moved you know the sort of thing just normal questions.
i thought i waas coping well but then i started crying all the time once on a bus i just burst into tears couldnt handle money wouldnt answer the phone wanted to stay in bed all day didnt want to get a bath or do any cleaning or washing even though i had been very houseproud wouldnt go to the doctors because i knew that i would start crying.
Husband finaly made me go to the doctors who after listening to me diagnosed clinical depression and put me on medication i was on meds for about 3 years and saw a counso;ur . came of meds myself against doctors because i felt they were not realy doing me any good been off meds about 2 years have some bad days some very bad days but also have some realy good days, when its a realy bad day i i try and tell myself that tomorrow is going to be better, also find if i have a walk and a trawl round shops it makes me feel a bit better exercise is supposed to be good for you i dont think i will ever be completly free of depression but have learnt to live with it
Love Jackie

Evening evereyone, had a difficult day pain-wise, but the mood is holding, and I just received 4 new house plants from someone on Freecycle. That's my pick-me-up!
Carolina, you should be very proud of yourself, it's huge step to walk through the Doctor's office door. Please update us - we care.

Interesting thinking about how the mention of emotional/mental issues is a "hidden illness".
That I understand, both from the depression and - in my home I have 4 grandchildren - 2 of them with both Autism AND Epilepsy. They look "normal". I want to hang a sign which says " these children are not badly behaved, they are crying or "having a melt-down" because they cannot communicate their needs or fears. Please be patient and be grateful it's not your child. This is NOT the result of bad parenting, but watch grandmother turn into an ogre if you criticize my daughter, who is an outstandingly patient Mum". They, like those with depression, need compassion and Mum needs assistance - but can anyone other than family members offer, or agree to mind them for a couple of hours so the Mummy, Auntie and grandmother could go for a little mental break, for tea, or supper or just a walk in the rain? Both children always seem to see the bank as the best place for a 'meltdown', others just stand and look disapprovingly at their mother, nobody ever asks if she needs help to get them back out to the car, two whirling dervishes, and no free hand to open the door. let go of one and they'll be running through the parking lot among the cars.
It just takes a minute to reach out one's hand and offer assistance. When their Mummy was 5, recently diagnosed with epilepsy, poorly controlled, having up to 30 seizures a day, I had her, her sister age 4 with ADHD and her baby brother, with me while trying to shop. The baby was on my back, the ADHD child was in the cart and the eldest walking beside me. Suddnely she was in seizure (she had 9 different types then), totally rigid and I had to leave my purchases and return home. I picked the rigid one up with one arm, picked the one from the cart in the other arm and headed for the shop door, only to be met by a revolving door!! (Now I can laugh). Picture me trying to get the 3 kids (one of whom was like a 4' board) and myself through one of those doors. I was just about in tears, when a man came over and said, 'here let me carry this one', and he took my rigid child and carried her to the car. He waited while I safely fastened the other 2 in the back seat, and then gently placed my daughter in the front seat, which was the only place she would fit when rigid. Her head was touching the seat at the back and her feet were on the floor. I felt totally inadequate just to say "thank you".
As long as I live I will never forget the feeling that came over me when someone took the time to care. Many times I have wished I could thank him again, but now instead, I try to pass on caring, remembering that once it was me at the end of my rope, and a kind person saved me from a breakdown.

Please forgive me if I rambled on too long, those who understand depression/anxiety and related conditions, know that feeling of being overwhelmed and are increasingly able to spot signs in others who are struggling in silence. A kind word can make all the difference.
Blessings,
Mary

hi every one lve been trying to read al lof this thread there are a lot of us out there ,l too am on the citrolopram.is it catching ?!! there seem to be alot of us on it. the quacks dont seem to think that l will get any better they said l was probably at the best that lm likely to be,although sometimes l take a nose dive. so as they say l will keep taking the tablets!!
Marilyn