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A cautionary tale

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date


Jonesey Report 6 Aug 2011 09:22

A cautionary tale perhaps for those who help others to find their living relatives:


FAIRTHORN Report 6 Aug 2011 09:26


Just before the trial this was posted on the general chat board

but it disappeared

No idea why, as I just read the opening post

perhaps some inappropriate comments were added to the thread



Flick Report 6 Aug 2011 10:05

Very timely...................

There are GR members who send contact details without apparently questioning the veracity of the person asking for the info

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 6 Aug 2011 10:15

Fairthorn, it was me that posted it on General Chat, as I thought like Jonesey it made for a cautionary tale , and an interesting general discussion.

But I did say I would remove it immediately if anyone was offended by it...and someone asked me to do so because of concerns re privacy for family :-)

However this might be of interest, that I quoted....

""Incest remains one of society's last taboos and is an unthinkable concept to most people.

Yet research by the British Medical Journal showed that half of those separated from relatives at a young age experience strong sexual feelings when they are reunited.

Psychiatrists believe the natural repulsion brothers and sisters feel for one another as children acts as an inhibitor to committing incest.

But those who miss out on this time can develop powerful, obsessive feelings for their sibling in adulthood."


FAIRTHORN Report 6 Aug 2011 10:24

I think this case is the exception cos as the defence said
the female is very naive.

But we know it still happens Fred & Rose West BOTH from "Close" families with no social barriers



TootyFruity Report 6 Aug 2011 22:37

Nudged to keep it on the first page

Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 6 Aug 2011 23:05

A very sad situation


Jonesey Report 7 Aug 2011 10:58

Worth a nudge as a warning to today's helpers.


TootyFruity Report 8 Aug 2011 07:51

Definitely food for thought


Cynthia Report 9 Aug 2011 14:24

Worth a read. Cx


chrissiex Report 10 Aug 2011 01:11

it happens far far more with people who never used genesreunited or any other site to find anyone ... sexual exploitation of younger female family members by older male family members is a sad but not uncommon fact of life ...

surely the young woman did not start out her search in the hope of starting a sexual relationship with her father

I am cautious about parents looking for children ( not a terribly common case on these boards but I have posted here myself about the potential dangers particularly when the child or their siblings are very young ) ... but I believe children have a human right to know or at least know about their parents ... not that I don't enquire about the situation some first, e.g. the age of the child ...

is one freakish situation like this enough to deter people from helping adults find their parents ? these people didn't even have any help from third parties, they found each other ...


TootyFruity Report 10 Aug 2011 08:01

The report highlights one thing and as bad as it is nobody could have foreseen the outcome. Nevertheless the family is devastated.

However, it could have been so much worse. We could have been reading about a murder case where the perpetrator had found their victim with the help of well meaning members. The victim may of escaped the perpetrator in the past because of an abusive relationship. The perpetrator may have posed as someone looking for a family member, say sister, uncle, brother, aunt etc.....

This is why I feel that there should be an intermediatory service and the person being sought given a chance to decline contact if they so wish. It is not enough to say the information is out there and we are just passing it on because it is one thing to search for oneself but quite another to be handed the contact details on a plate. Although I accept that in the case reported it most probably still happened.


Jonesey Report 12 Aug 2011 19:30


Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 7 Sep 2011 22:33



Jimbob377 Report 8 Sep 2011 00:52

Situations such as this will happen regardless of the existence of Genes Reunited
It is an extreme situation by anyone's yardstick but does show the depravity that people are capable of descending to


AmazingGrace08 Report 8 Sep 2011 03:55

Yuck....even worse think of the people who can use sites like this and well intentioned peole to track down and stalk ...very scary concept......