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find birth mother

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Joy

Joy Report 13 Apr 2013 13:11

Everyone has a right to have an opinion. Mine is:

I think it is helpful to read:-

http://www.genesreunited.co.za/boards/board/living_relatives

and

http://www.genesreunited.co.za/contents/gettingintouchwithlivingrelatives

and

http://www.genesreunited.co.za/boards/board/living_relatives/thread/1287449;

also, before the mid 1970s (I can't remember the exact year), a birth mother was not only told that she would never see her baby again, she was also promised total privacy; it is, I understand, recommended that there is mediation between an adoptee and a birth parent, particularly in the situations of people born before that year in the 1970s. Many years after someone is born, the circumstances of the parent can be completely different.

I do sympathise with a seeker and a person being sought. It is possible that in the situation of this thread's original poster, the person being sought, or someone known to the person being sought, requested the name to be removed, that we shall never know. I wish all parties well.

Penny

Penny Report 13 Apr 2013 20:53

how are adoptees supposed to find family without going to these firms that chage hundreds ??

By going through the post adoption service in their local county council

Doesn't cost a bean!

jax

jax Report 13 Apr 2013 20:54

You would not have got a warning for giving an address in a private message...you must have said something on the thread which got reported??

jax

jax Report 13 Apr 2013 21:21

You posted the ladies name...I saw it, but it was'nt me who reported it

There was no need for you to post it after GR had edited out her first name for the same reason and the address and everything else had already been sent, had you read the posts before yours.

Flip

Flip Report 13 Apr 2013 21:33

Can we all stop this please, this is Angela's thread and she is a new member. Whatever we have done to help her is being totally destroyed by all this disagreement/debate which isn't relevant to her quest.

Adoption is a highly charged subject, but do we really need to degenerate into a debate on a new members thread? And yes, I answered some critism earlier, but so far have refrained from getting into this. Please let it rest.

Have a debate on Genealogy chat, not on someones thread.

jax

jax Report 13 Apr 2013 21:37

Well GR should have removed the whole thread when it was reported...it was'nt needed anymore the info had already been sent by pm at least twice

sanny

sanny Report 13 Apr 2013 21:39

Angela hope it all works out for you :-)

Kay????

Kay???? Report 13 Apr 2013 21:47


Joy that isn totally true,,,,no birth mother from 1927 was then or now given any promise of privacy.

Sanny,then refrain from jumping in to freely send address in certain circumstances, please ,,,,,,you may send an address to someone whos barred from any family contact.!

Sheila

Sheila Report 14 Apr 2013 00:53

I would like to say that we do now have a group on FB that tries to help and support people that are looking for family. If anyone needs help then feel free to pm.
Whilst I agree with an adoptee having the right to try and trace their family, I do think they need some guidance and support, whilst doing this, We try to help guide them through contact etc. and part of the reason we do this is the vast cost some organizations where charging people.
Now more than ever since the demise of Norcap people will be looking, but you should also be wary about giving out addresses etc without know the state of mind of the person looking.
Good Luck to all of those searching and if you need help feel free to pm me .