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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date


philmoir Advisor Report 1 May 2012 10:25

I have merged thread 1298204 that was started by wisechild into this one as they are on the same subject. I hope there is not too much confusion by overlapping threads


Reggie Report 1 May 2012 09:14

Glitter Baby

I think that GR are 'sharing' the threads - Estelle replied on this one, and Katie replied on the one I started.

Both are keeping their heads down at the moment, I think!

And, of course, they aren't going to take a blind bit of notice of what we are saying - the 'discussion' nonsense is someone's 'baby', and they won't let go




Cynthia Report 1 May 2012 08:31

Please do not turn blue Scozzie, it really isn't worth it.

I'm not sure where to start, but I'll do my best.

Yes, you posted a message on a thread which had connections to your family. At the time, you didn't realise it was an old post - fair enough.

As soon as you posted your message, it appeared at the top of the board as all threads do.

Whilst I was doing my browsing I spotted it and added my advice. I then moved on and helped someone else.

Old threads are fairly easy to spot because they are usually 'headed' in a different way to nowadays.

The helpers all browse through the various threads seeing whom they can help or advise - several have specialised knowledge.

Due to family circumstances, I generally have a fair amount of time to spend browsing the boards. I look at each board (except games) daily.

As I don't have the quick look up skills of my fellow members, I spend my time going through the previous day's posts to see if anyone hasn't returned to see the help/advice they have been given. I feel it is a pity if they miss out on something which may be important to them.

Occasionally, I make a comment - such as I did on yours - and then, generally, send the OP a pm with a friendly message about how to find their replies.

I started to do this years ago when there were many comments from helpers about the lack of response to the help and advice given.

Most new folk still think that they will receive an alert from GR to say that someone has contacted them and are grateful when guided in the right direction.

Many new members also do as you did - they give advice on an old thread hoping to help the OP. That's fine - we just let them know that, because the thread is so out of date, they may not get a response and it would be better to click on the OP's name. At least that way, they have a chance of getting in touch if the OP still has the same email address.

I know you didn't ask for help or advice but, when a thread appears at the top of a board, it is seen by most of the helpers who then open it to see if they can help or advise.

I hope this helps because I don't know how else to explain it.


Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 1 May 2012 08:03

Indeed Reggie.


LadyScozz Report 1 May 2012 01:45

Cynthia has said she was trying to help me, so I don't understand your comment.

I did not take umbrage, I was explaining what happened.

I tried to help someone.......... then the next post I was given advice, even though I had added to the thread that I had information for the OP......... then it got weird, people letting me know what "helpers" did.

I had no idea I had put Cynthia in a position to defend herself. Cynthia tried to help me, I said I didn't need help.

I'll say it again, because this point seems to have been missed -


I did not expect responses to that, advising me how to use the site.

I could explain until I am blue in the face.

I've said it all.


jax Report 1 May 2012 01:17


NO ONE was trying to help you

Cynthia was offering advice

In the two years of helping on these boards I have seen 100s of old threads being replied on, and I must say this is the first time I have seen anyone take umbridge.

You did not say you had sent a pm until after Cynthia replied...then made a big thing about the fact you were not new??

But you have since said you are new??

I also said if you want to reply to old threads then just carry be honest it's no big deal if you want to talk to yourself and maybe in 5 years time someone who is actually interested in your family may see it.

All you needed to say was "Thanks for that have also sent a pm"...end of


LadyScozz Report 1 May 2012 00:34

I DO understand why the helpers are unhappy.

I posted on a thread trying to help someone. The next post was someone trying to help ME! On the "looking for ancestors" board.

If you're a "helper" and add to a thread trying to help someone, what would you do if the next post was advising you on how to search for names?

I DID NOT think every comment was directed at me. If my name is on a thread I have every right to reply to it.

I DO NOT have "tunnel vision" (that comment was directed at me).

I COULD NOT understand why helpers kept trying to help me when I had said over and over that I wasn't looking for help. The posts after that kept on about how helpers looked on the boards in order to help people....... with advice for me...... which I had already said I hadn't asked for.

Obviously I am not as experienced on the boards as many of you.

I have not been rude or made personal comments about anyone.

Can't say I feel welcome.


LadyScozz Report 1 May 2012 00:08

I respond to posts that have my name at the top. Am I supposed to ignore posts addressed to me?

At NO time have I thought this discussion revolved around me. I posted on that old thread before I noticed the date. I made a mistake. Perhaps I should have deleted my post immediately?

The old post I responded to in error - I've already said this - I posted there because I could have helped the OP (Alex). At NO time did I say I was seeking help. I didn't ask anyone to search for names for me; I was taken aback when asked if I had searched for these names. I kept saying I hadn't asked for help. That seemed to come across as me being ungrateful, more posts appeared about how some members help others (and that I hadn't helped anyone on the boards - which I haven't - but I've helped people on GR many times).

Perhaps if helpers had stopped advising me on how to search etc.......... this would have stopped days ago. Woops....... I'll get another post about that comment.


I've been told that I didn't annoy anyone. Doesn't look like it.

My responses on the ONE old thread have been removed.

I didn't break any rules.

I did something by mistake.

I have not been rude to anyone.


GlitterBaby Report 30 Apr 2012 23:07

Certainly Estelle did post on the boards

Do not recollect any others of the GR Team doing that

Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 30 Apr 2012 22:57


Have you, or any of your colleagues, ever actually used the message boards in the way that we, the paying members, use them?"

- Reggie, I remember giving Estelle help with research :)


GlitterBaby Report 30 Apr 2012 22:32

Rather strange the Estelle did not post her comments on both threads that are discussing this problem

Obviously expect members to read all threads to see what response is being given by GR


Cynthia Report 30 Apr 2012 22:16

I fully understand Sylvia's frustration.

It's very upsetting when, having helped on the boards daily for years, someone who hasn't much experience of the boards, takes umbrage at what is known to be helpful information.

On the plus side, there are many, many more mebers who are grateful for advice. :-D

Reggie, I think we all know that the answer to that is a resounding NO.

Even when a member of the team asked for help with research last year, they had to be reminded to come back and see the help they had been given. :-S :-S

Wonder what will happen when the Successes begin to dry up because so many seasoned helpers are tired of not being listened to????


Reggie Report 30 Apr 2012 21:42

Not only unnecessary, but the 'discussion' tab is causing havoc.

But I fear we're stuck with it, as GR are not likely to admit that their latest 'bright idea' is an unmitigated disaster (not the first, by any means). They don't use the why should they care?


Reggie Report 30 Apr 2012 21:37


Have you, or any of your colleagues, ever actually used the message boards in the way that we, the paying members, use them?


Reggie Report 30 Apr 2012 21:31

Scozzie decided that every comment on here was directed at her - nothing could be further from the truth

I doubt that most people even knew she'd posted - let alone got herself into such a tizz for no reason whatsoever

She isn't a 'helper' on the boards at present, so has no way of understanding the frustration felt by those of who do try to help.

She seems to suffer a little bit from tunnel vision - to say the least


SylviaInCanada Report 30 Apr 2012 21:18

In full disclosure ......................

I was the one who posted that message to Scozzie about .............

"So .......... the best bet is for YOU to stop posting on here, and let US all get on with our suggestions for improving the site .........."

It was posted in pure frustration at the end of a series of exchanges AND at the end of a long post by me trying to explain once again why so many people were not happy with Discussions.

It seemed that Scozzie could not or would not understand why we were unhappy when she was so happy ...................... and was herself getting more and more upset because we would not or could not understand why she was happy, and was against what we were saying about Discussions.

Plus the fact that she seemed to have this idea that she had been well and truly told off for posting on an old thread .................. which was far from the case.

It just seemed to me that she and everyone else would be happier if we agreed to disagree, and that she would be better to no longer wind herself up.

Unfortunately, she and everyone else has taken it the wrong way ................... and of course, this is why IGP has been asking questions this morning abut whether any member has the right to tell anyone else not to post.

Of course, they don't .............. and I was wrong to express my frustration in that way.

I'm sorry that Cynthia got caught in the middle ...................... she most certainly would never have said anything to upset anyone, and it was wrong for Scozzie to put C into the position of having to defend herself.



SylviaInCanada Report 30 Apr 2012 21:07


One member posted last week that he had received the following notification ................

"there are more than 1000 discussions containing information about the Rellie family name"

someone else has reported getting notification of threads for the name "Private"

The mind boggles!

I do not agree that members with threads started in 2009 are necessarily no longer on the site

But I really do wonder at threads started from 2001 through to 2005 or 2006, and with the member showing as having 0 to 3 or 4 posts

GR wasn't even in operation in 2001, was it?????

Do you realise how often GR staffers ask US, the members, to let them know about something or other .............. usually things that we should have no right in knowing.

As Reggie has said ....... how on earth would we know that someone has left the site?



LadyKira Report 30 Apr 2012 20:37

"There are more than 1000 discussions containing information about the Ball family name"
50 pages and many of them not even about the surname Ball but the noun ball and from chat. I would find that very confusing as a new member.

Why do you not remove the feature and give some fuller instructions how to use the search facility instead. Give a warning that the original poster may no longer be a member but the thread may contain pertinent information. :-)


jax Report 30 Apr 2012 17:39

There is one thread on this page where the poster has left the site and account deleted, but do we want ex members helpful posts deleted??

Maybe change their board names to "No longer a member"

If someone does come accross a "helpful" thread with replies on, it would make sense to see the whole thread without bits missing with people talking to themselves :-)


Cynthia Report 30 Apr 2012 17:37

Hello Estelle,

I'm very sorry to see that GR is not listening to those experienced members without whom, the site would be a poorer place.

Any success that GR proudly advertises about, is almost always due to the expert help people have received on these boards.

If we cease to advise the new members that the post they have replied to is very old and that they are unlikely to get a response and that it's better to send a pm, then I can foresee a lot of very disappointed people.

Personally, I will now be concentrating on contacting those who have not returned to their own thread rather than contacting those who have responded to old posts.