General Chat

Zen Teachings

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact, just p*** off and leave me alone.

2. S** is like air. It's not that important unless you aren't getting any.

3. No one is listening until you f***.

4. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

6. If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

8. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

10. If you lend someone £20 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.

11. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

12. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the wind screen.

13. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

14. Good judgment comes from bad experience ... and most of that comes from bad judgment.

15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.

17. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

18. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our a** ... then things just keep getting worse.

20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

You are very welcome Wendy, my sister sent it to me. How's the weather there? Warm here but with very heavy storms that last about 30 minutes.

Is that to cool down Wendy???? sorry!! didn't you have a freezer before? I have to admit it is one thing I miss with the apartment as the little ice box doesn't hold much more than one pack of mince!!

I believe they have finished all the work they were doing at Los Cristianos according to somebody T knows. Whereabouts is iceland? Not seen it.

Ann xx

thanks Wendy for the offer to put things in the freezer, that will be useful.

Still chuckling over M and the bolognese/chillie. you could try and learn to like it, or throw a chillie party!!!