General Chat

my mum has now been put in a nursing home as she can no longer mange to live on her own. Havin visited her in the home for the first time today we are not very happy the home in general didnt seem very nice the matron spoke quite poor english and when we asked her what medication mother was on she looked at the drug chart but then said she didnt know what some of the medicence were or what they were used for. which did not inspire us with confidence. we are also very concerned because we (me and my sister) botth live 4 hours away and it worrires us greatly that we will not be able get to our mum very often and also make sure that she is being properly looked after and that someone is doing all the little thingss that make life woth living.
Mother is very confused and seems to have no idea of where she is when we got there today she was convinced that she was waiting for transport to tske to the care home even though she has been there for a week now.

We have appilied for power of attorney but we want to know is it possible to get her into a nursing near us her only family and how do we go about it?

She will be eligible for help with her fees as she falls below the £23,000 capital limit but we have no idea how all this funding works because care home fee vary and it seems the better quality of cxare the more it cost but will social services pay the higher fees or will she forced to stay in a third rate estabishment?

Can anyone give me some answers or pointers as to where to go to find the answers?


claire

Whitenancy - where is your mother as the rules vary across England & Scotland

she is current in west norfolk and we live in east chehsire

does your Mum have a social worker Claire?

Could you get on to your local Age Concern and ask for advice?I'm sure if you live in England that they will be able to advise.I know it is a terrible problem with aging parents,we had this a few years ago with both my mum and OH's aunt,so do sympathise.Other than that go to some homes near to you or your sister and ask them the procedure to get her transferred.We went to a number of homes to check them out before we decided.

Brenda x

You can check out the care home on the internet. It will have been inspected by the Care Standards or Care Commission. That organisation keeps changing it's name. They report on all aspects of the care delivered by the home and about staffing.

if your Mum has a social worker they may be able to help, getting funding to another area can be sometimes a bit difficult , but they should be able to help.

Hope it all works out for you and your Mum

Claire, I dont know if power of attorney is the same in England as in New Zealand. What you really need is Enduring Power of Attorney, but it sounds as if it is too late to get it. Ordinary P.o.A. as I understand it only lasts if the person is 'of sound mind'. The enduring sort lasts as long as they are alive, but they need to sign it while still of sound mind, so dont be surprised if you have problems. Sorry about that.

Huia.

she dose have a social worker but he seems at much use as a wet paper bag. had dealing with him before she went into to hospital and he didnt seem to know verymuch about anything.

When my grandad was in and unsuit able home ......like colditz !! my dad rang another home and the Matron went to visit my grandad and agreed he needed to be moved and she got him moved in 48 hours ....he was taken across county lines and different NHS districts no problems at all.....

He had no social worker coz he wouldnt have one !!! but he didnt know who anyone was anyway .....

Good Luck hun ....citizen advice may be a good cheap starting place

Hi Claire
You can have your mum moved to a home near you. If she currently has funding by social services, they will remain responsible for her social care fees (either part or in full) in her new home. If she is assessed as needing nursing care that part of the fee will be paid by the new authority.

Go and visit some homes, and you will get a feel for the place. Don't make an appointment - just turn up!!

Good luck xx

I agree with Lyndi and Island....just turn up.The one I chose for my mum was owner managed and they lived on the premises.The smells I got were of home baking and not the nasty smells that seemed to pervade some homes.I found the smaller ones were more homely as well.
My daughter worked for a bupa home and they had a very low budget for food.Maybe they're not all the same,but there was no difference in care for those who paid and those who were state funded.
hope this all helps

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Just a qucik post to say a big thanks for all the posts and messages. we have been so busy emptying the loft and mother wardrobe etc that i havent had much time to check my thread.

Both my sister and i are seriously not happy with the care home mother is and mother is not very happy either. We are now off to look at aq couple of beter care homes in King s Lynn before heading home to chehsire.

Have also made contact with mother social work who has given me a bit more info on funding etc but had no idea on how to go about moving her from one county to another but he has promised to get back to us on that but i shant hold my breath lol.

Once again thank you for all yoiur suggestions and support it is nice to know that i have friends

bye for now

Claire

Dear Claire, as someone who worked in a Home for the Aged for 22 years, I have a bit of knowledge of how things run here. Mind you I am in Canada, but some things I am sure hold true everywhere.
I have also walked in your shoes, having had my mother in a Care home for 5 years before her passing.
Your mother has rights.You, as her advocate, have rights.
If you have concerns and get inadequate answers, go higher up the chain of command. If one has concerns about the qualifications of the matron for example, I would go to the director of Care (whatever their title). If unsuccessful again, go to the Director of the facility.

Having given out medications for a total of 43 years, I have a pretty good knowledge base as far as drugs are concerned, however there are always new ones added, or new names given to old ones. It is mandatory that a nurse is familiar with the medications, I can recall several situations where I did not give a medication, because of the patient's condition,or my personal concern over the dose perhaps being too high etc. This only comes from experience. In Care homes, the nurse is called on to make many an 'executive decision' in the absence of a doctor on-site, to administer first aid with great regularity and to assess the need for transfer to hospital. If he/she appears to be not fully competent, they should be supervised until they are, or be retrained in that area.
Sorry to ramble, don't intend to get you excited, just want to support you in doing your best for your mother. You have the right to ask questions as her advocate.
Good luck, and best wishes for your Mum to be in a comfortable and caring facility..
Mary

Dear Claire, If you are unhappy then seek help from any authority the others have mentioned.
it is a shame that the care homes are so varied and it is so difficult finding a good one.
I only hope if ever I need to go into one that I am lucky enough to be sent to a comfortable, clean, homely, friendly place.... that is not too much of a wish in our old age is it?
Good luck in your search Claire and dont let the people in the home treat you as if *they are doing you a favour*. They are being paid to care for your mother and she needs to feel cared for. Good luck to you and your sister.
Deanna X

If she currently has funding by social services, they will remain responsible for her social care fees (either part or in full) in her new home.


This bother me slightly as care home fees in east cheshire are higher than their counterparts in Norfolk. If she moves to a 3star care home in Norfolk the fee would be around £750 a week where as a comparable home is Cheshire is at least a £100 a week more which might well put it out of her reach.

Based on the figure that the social worker gave us for how much funding she would get she could afford to pay the difference to make up the £750 but not until her house has been sold as she is still paying a mortgage on it but i not sure she could find another £100+ a week out of her pension.

Norfolk is a much cheaper place to live than Cheshire in Norfolk you could buy a 4 bed 2 bath detached character property for the same price a as 2/3 bed terrace

Hi Claire
Mum having a property with a mortgage makes things a little more complicated when working out the financing of her care.
Once the property is sold and the mortgage paid, will she have enough left to become responsible for paying all of her care? If it does, and Norfolk SS aren't involved she can certainly move where she likes, but you need to know which authority will pick up when her money runs out.
I really think you need some expert financial advice as you won't get that from social services. Age Concern are excellent.

Certainly go for the financial advice. I think there is a window where SS will 'loan' the fees until the property is sold (assuming no one else has residential rights)

As the property market is so sluggish, if her home is empty, have you considered renting it to cover the mortgage? Also if empty, tell the district council as she won't have to pay Council Tax on it. Although you need to check, I think it's up to a year.

Hi Claire,

We were in a position similar to yours,except there was no mortgage for mother's flat,but after her savings ran out,they funded her care until her house was sold and then we had a big chunk of the money to pay them back.
It riled me at the time because i'd helped her to buy it in the first place but wanted her to have her own ownership,but I did look upon it as her money for her own care.It's a shame when some have been careful and saved for things and others who have spent their money get the same care.
As I said before we found Age Concern fill us in on our rights.