General Chat

Junior School Children Writing about the Sea.

1) This a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

2) Oysters balls are called pearls. ( James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island. If you don't have sea all around you, you are incontinent. (Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson.
She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of his head. (Billy age 8)

6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs. (Millie age 6

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean.
Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come.
My brother said they would be better off eating Beans, (William age 7)

8) I like mermaids, they are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails.
How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming and being sick, my dad keeps shouting at my mum, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock.
They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe when the go under the water. Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)

13) On holiday my mum went went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast.
She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny. (Julie age 7)


F.

I found these funny, why did no one else?

Priceless!! You had me in tears, haven't laughed so much for ages.
Best Wishes.

Hilarious,it makes you wonder how teachers manage to get anything done when marking the kids work.

Kevin just made me spit my tea over my keyboard bless him LOLOLOL xx

absolutely priceless. i have a bad cough and up til now was ok. couldnt stop laughing and coughing for 5 minutes. best laugh ive had this weekend.

PMSL the logic is so....logical!