General Chat

We went to visit my Mum in new dementia unit,
The old chap sat next to her was very nice and we introduced ourselves. Then one of the carers came and said to Fred ( I'll change his name, data protection) "Hello Fred I've come to take you to bed" and quick as flash he said "ooh how much is it"?
Well my son who's 34 nearly fell off his chair laughing.. The carer kept a straight face!
I'm still smiling and laughing to myself. Fred wasn't there tonight I'm wondering if the thought has worn him out, bless him..
Don't write them off just because they have dementia,they are still very much human and lovable and funny.
Tricia xx

LOL. I know exactly what you mean:))

So right...Patricia,
Its a sad thing dementia, heart breaking to see your loved ones deteriorate into their own little world.
Hope your mums OK.

My daughter is a carer on a dementia unit.She loves these people.I have been in many a time and met them.They are very funny.I work in a Mental Health and i really enjoy it.I had one of my residents come up to me yesterday and told me she was "a baby when she was born"I had to cover my mouth when i answered her,then ran to have a laugh.Love them to bits.Annie

aw sounds sweet, in the home i done voluntary work in they were brill, one thought her son played for boro, and used to tell us all about him, bless her xxx

Tricia it's sounds great, I don't think I could ever write them off just make friends for when I join them :-)

Hope your Mum is happy there

Tricia, I hope the carers are as loving as Grannie's daughter. The carers where my husband is dont just care clinically, I can see and feel the love they all have for the residents. It is as if the residents are their own family members. It is so lovely.

One of the residents I secretly think of as Belligerent Belinda. She has such a belligerent look on her face all the time. I think it looks rather funny but some of the other visitors are a bit scared of her. At the Easter party yesterday she did take a swing at one of the carers, but he ducked away in time. I enjoy watching the other residents with all their different ways.

Huia.

how lovely and sad , my lovely nan had dementior she would tell me about her son my dad and his children , she would call her daughter miss and would often think she was at school, some times she would be ok and you could see the reccognition in her eyes , i looked after a man he seemed quite young in the home i worked at i would take him to his bed , as i was pulling back the covers while he was undressing he would tell me he waas going out dancing, noone used to visit him he looked very young to have dementia xx

The carers too have so much patience
I remember in the 1960.s when dads mum had to go into care because her dementia made her a danger to the family. She came to live with Mum & Dad but it became clear she wasnt coping when she turned on the gas to make a cup of tea and then forgot & didnt light it and went to bed ,My dad was snoozing in the kitchen and mum was upstairs watching TV, it was only the dog in the garden barking to come in that annoyed mum cos dad wasnt letting him in that mum went down and on opening the kitchen door smelt gas and dad was unconscious in the chair ,(must explain this was a Victorian terrace which had 5 floors and the lower floor was garden level)
Anyway not long after nan developed gangrene in a toe which had to be amputated and then the Hospital assessed her and put her in their old peoples annex. They were VERY WELL looked after with hairdressers and chiropodists visiting and every two weeks they had local amateur groups that would hold old time song sessions, BUT nan had to be watched cos she would go around and collect up other peoples teeth and glasses and put them her her large holdall handbag that she hung onto for dear life, every day the staff had to retrieve other patients possessions from her bag BUT it wasnt a pleasant thing cos she would also somehow put feces in it too!!
The Staff though were so very kind and would say to her come on Emma lets have a look what you have collected today!

hi tricia,im still in the early stages of coping with my mom and dementia.but your story cheers me up a bit.thankyou.xxx

Dementia is an awful thing when it affects someone like your parents.My Mum had it ,but I have to say we all had a good laugh at times when she came out with something.She would laugh too and then say what are we laughing about?That set everyone off again.I could write a book .Her escapes from the home with her pockets full of food (for emergencies),looking up lonely hearts in the paper for someone to dancing with,and catching her with the phone in her hand just about to ring a number!!!.I could go on and on.It is terribly sad ,but you have to laugh .It is the way to cope.

I remember going with my mum to visit her in the 1960..s My dad used to visit on a Sunday and mum would go on a Tuesday or Wednesday. It was her birthday and mum bought a sponge birthday cake to take in to her and I said can i come too? Mum and I went and she was sitting in the communal sitting room in a big comfy armchair. the staff came round to serve afternoon tea at about 4pm and visitors got a cuppa too. The cake was taken to the kitchen to be cut after she had seen it,and then brought back to nan with candles on for her to blow out,we sang Happy Birthday but she just looked bemused. Anyway I was talking trivia to her and she didnt seem to be with it so Mum said to her you know who this is ? its Freds Shirley. (my dad was Fred her son) Oh yes she said I know who she is .she is getting a big girl ,will be leaving school soon!! Well I was c26 married with a 6 year old!!
But bless her she did have lucid moments although sometimes it was heartbreakong cos she wanted to go home to FRED. Now whether that was my dad or her first husband ,my dads father, who was lost at sea in 1911 we will never know. When we were young she was a very austere lady who thought children were to be seen and not heard so we would NEVER presume to ask her about grandfather,Wish we could have cos she could have told us where in Germany he was born AND what happened to His dad Auguste after 1907.when his wife Maria died!