General Chat

My dad used to drive a cesspit lorry.One of his colleagues was waiting at the traffic lights in his wagon and noticed the woman behind him laughing.
Upon his return to the yard he saw on the back of his tanker the picture some wag had drawn in the dust.It was a man holding a prong and on the prong was a big sausage. Underneath was the caption "Fresh Daily."

Oh yes, what a good selection! I'm always spotting them but wouldnt you know it , cant remember any just now!

all gave me a giggle,
thanks guys

We had one at work.

"This Door must be kept locked at all times"

We now know why the place was always a mess. It was the door to the cleaner's closet.....!

Thank you Ann and Eddie you've given me a great laugh. Cheered me up on this freezing cold day.
Margaret

I have a photo, taken at a Northampton hospital, of a sign that reads thus:- Family Planning Advice - Use Rear Entrance

Sign over a Gynecologist' s Office:
> 'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'
> ************ ********* *****
>
>
> In a Podiatrist's office:
> ' Time wounds all heels.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
>
> On a Septic Tank Truck:
> Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> On a Plumber's truck:
> 'We repair what your husband fixed.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
>
> On another Plumber's truck:
> 'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> On a Church's Bill board:
> '7 days without God makes one weak.'
>
> ************ ********* ****
>
> At a Tyre Store
> 'Invite us to your next blowout.'
>
> ************ ********* ************ ** ********* *****
>
> In a Non-smoking Area:
> 'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
>
> On a Maternity Room door:
> 'Push. Push. Push.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> At an Optometrist' s Office:
> 'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> On a Taxidermist' s window:
> 'We really know our stuff.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> On a Fence:
> 'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> At a Car Dealership:
> 'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> Outside a Car Exhaust Store:
> 'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming..'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> In a Vets waiting room:
> 'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> In a Restaurant window:
> 'Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
> 'Drive carefully. We'll wait..'
>
> ************ ********* *****
>
> And don't forget the sign at a
> RADIATOR SHOP:
> 'Best place in town to take a leak.'
>
>
> ************ ********* *
>
> Sign on the back of yet another
> Septic Tank Truck:
>
>
> 'Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises'