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Piddling Pete

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JoyBoroAngel Report 3 Dec 2018 22:08

A famous dog once came to town
Known to his friends as Pete
His pedigree was ten yards long
His looks were hard to beat

And as he trotted down the road
'twas beautiful to see
His work at every corner
Every post and every tree

He never missed a land mark
He never missed a post
For piddling was his masterpiece
And piddling pleased him most

The city dogs stood looking on
In deep and jealous rage
To see this little country dog
The piddler of his age

They smelt his efforts one by one
They smelt him two by two
But noble Pete in high disdain
Stood still 'til they were through

Then when they'd smelt him everywhere
The praise for him ran high
But when one smelt him underneath
Pete piddled in his eye

Just then to show these city dogs
He didn't care a damn
He strolled into the grocers shop
And piddled on the ham

He piddled on the cornflakes
He piddled on the floor
And when the grocer threw him out
He piddled up the door

Behind him all the city dogs
Debated what to do
They'd hold a piddling carnival
The hoop they'd put him through

They showed him all the piddling posts
They knew about the town
And off they set with many a wink
To wear the stranger down

But Pete was with them all the way
With vigour and with vim
A thousand piddles more or less
Were all the same to him

And on and on went noble Pete
As tireless as a windmill
And very soon those city dogs
Were piddled to a standstill

Then Pete an exhibition gave
Of all the ways to piddle
With double drips and fancy flips
And now and then a dribble

The city dogs said farewell Pete
Your piddling did defeat us
But no one ever put them wise
That Pete... had diabete


JoyBoroAngel Report 3 Dec 2018 22:10

I am looking after my neighbors dog
And its tiny But it can pee for England

It Reminded me of this poem :-D :-D :-D


Bobtanian Report 3 Dec 2018 22:31

our 12 year old border Collie, crossed the Rainbow bridge 3 weeks ago,, and is now probably sniffing every other blade of grass and peeing on the rest!


JoyBoroAngel Report 3 Dec 2018 22:35

This little dog pees if you stroke
it Pees if you dont stroke
it Pees if I leave it
and pees if I dont

And wont Pee at all when I let him out

Thank god I am minding him in his own home
along with two Cats that are no bother :-D :-D


maggiewinchester Report 3 Dec 2018 23:48

:-D :-D :-D :-D


maggiewinchester Report 4 Dec 2018 00:17

One of my cats, (Betty) who's never really liked venturing upstairs, decided she liked my bed, about 3 weeks ago.
This was okay with me and her brother, George, who has always followed me up to bed.
However - last week, Betty decided to 'claim' my bed.
She peed on it.
She peed on it 3 days on the trot.

I went up on Friday, and found Betty on the bed, and George on a chair.
George and I are now in the spare bedroom, in a single bed, while I try various was of defeating Betty's 'claim'.(and washing and drying loads of bedding) :-| :-| :-|
The duvet (a king size 10.5 tog) wont fit in my washing machine, so it's ruined,

If the bed is stripped of all but the essentials, Betty doesn't pee.
If we're not in the bed, Betty doesn't pee.
I put the (now ruined) duvet back on the bed, with an old shower curtain over it - Betty hasn't peed.

Once I have washed and dried all my linen I shall be making a comeback using two 4.5 tog duvets (which will fit individually in my machine), and, if Betty pees once more, I will actually close my bedroom door to her!
Something I have never done (mainly because it will mean my letting George out at some unearthly hour).
I know he goes out and comes back in as if he hasn't moved from my side all night.

Fortunately, I have a rubber mattress protector, covered by a quilted cover, so my mattress hasn't been peed on, but rubber protectors are difficult to dry in the rain!

Oh - and I bought a new 10.5 tog duvet on Saturday - but it's not coming out until I know Betty (AKA Violet Elizabeth Bott) has got bored with my bed, and has lost interest in 'claiming' it!

According to the internet, if your cat suddenly does this:
'Check their litter tray'. I don't have one - there's a cat flap and garden.
'Get them checked out by a vet' - well it appears she can 'manage' to make it when it suits her.
'Look for any major changes' - the only 'major change' is that, after 12 years, Betty (or 'Botty') has decided to come upstairs and claim my bed!
This is the wretch who would decide a carrier bag in the middle of the living room was 'the place to sleep - and I let her! I left a bl**dy carrier bag on the floor for her!
No more.

..rant over.... :-D


KathleenBell Report 4 Dec 2018 00:18

:-D :-D :-D :-D

Kath. x


JoyBoroAngel Report 4 Dec 2018 11:32

Maggie one of Our Strays cat has did that
But luck for her my washers got a massive drum
so fit in But drying was a nightmare

Thank you Kathleen :-D :-D


Sharron Report 4 Dec 2018 11:59

Nothing to do with dogs or cats but diabetes was known as the Pissing Evil so, if you need the services of a diabetic nurse at any time and she is not your favourite, just take comfort from knowing that she is a Pissing Evil nurse!


JoyBoroAngel Report 4 Dec 2018 15:35

My Diabetic Nurse is lovely Sharron lol

4 out of 5 of us in my Family are Diabetic :-( :-(


Kathryn Report 4 Dec 2018 19:00

Oh Sharonn boom boom :-D :-D


JoyBoroAngel Report 4 Dec 2018 22:55

Mind even a diabetic couldn't pee

as much as the little dog I am looking after :-( :-(


Kucinta Report 5 Dec 2018 08:59

If anything should happen to the new quilt, might be worth going to a launderette that has large as well as standard size washing machines?


Elizabeth2469049 Report 5 Dec 2018 10:43

I've used the launderette for duvets, ours will do it for you and dry it too - you pay of coutse!


maggiewinchester Report 5 Dec 2018 20:54

I've no idea where the nearest launderette is :-S

However, I looked in Tesco's at the weekend, went down the wrong aisle, and there, tucked in a corner was a bargain! (or about 4 to be precise).
I bought - for £11.50 - a 'Slumberdown' ;All Seasons duvet.
This is a king size 10.5 tog AND a king size 4.5 tog duvet - that can be linked together for those who want a 15 tog duvet!!
So, a summer and winter duvet at a bargain price!
However, I won't be using the 10.5 one until I'm sure Betty won't be peeing on my bed again.
I shall be using 2 x 4.5 tog duvets in the same cover, for the time being, as they will fit (one at a time) into my washing machine :-D


Elizabeth2469049 Report 5 Dec 2018 21:55

I have bought bargain duvets in the past - but I have found bargain ones have nmnimum quilting and that can give way so that it is very hard work to keep the stuffing even!


maggiewinchester Report 5 Dec 2018 22:04

I find Tesco's quite good - but this one ie a slumberdown :-D


JoyBoroAngel Report 8 Dec 2018 21:00

Doing a little dance round the front room

The neighbours are back home and
I dont have to do the dog

No more Piddling Pete till next year :-D :-D :-D


Bobtanian Report 11 Dec 2018 16:15

Violet Elizabeth Bott
I shall scweem and scweem until I make mythelf thick!!

now THATS a BLAST From the past!!

Just William!!


maggiewinchester Report 11 Dec 2018 17:35

Yes, that's my Betty!

I don't recall reading the books (though probably did, as one of my brothers had them)
However, I did /do listen to Martin Jarvis reading them on the radio :-D