General Chat

I had experience of living alone for almost a year back in 1992/93 when OH and daughter went to New Zealand for 10 months. I went down to join them for December and January, but otherwise was alone. I/we don't mind frozen home made meals so I would do a major cooking on a Sunday, such as stews and casseroles of the usual size, then parcel up individual meals and freeze them for use dring the week. I would take pop one in the oven straight out the freezer as soon as I got home from work, and had a hot meal with little extra work.

I also took the chance to try new meals that I knew OH or daughter would probably not like, such as lamb with 40 garlic bulbs :-D . It turned out lovely, and I really would have liked to make it again! I have to admit that a couple of the new stews that I tried were not really to my liking, but I made adjustments to the frozen ones so they were better!

OH and I still make stews and casseroles large enough for 6 or 7, but freeze them in portions large enough for 2 (stew) or individual packages.

I bought several books from a series titled 500 Recipes for xxxxxx. back in the early to mid-60s when I was living in flats and wanting to learn to cook. One was titled 500 Recipes for One. I still have them and even use them occasionally, although I must admit that I now find them rather bland and add more spices and herbs!

I noticed this morning when we went out that the cherry trees along the street north of us are out in full flower! They're a very pale pink ............. but it's 3-4 weeks before they normally flower :-0

We managed to get to my ophthalmologist's and picked up my new glasses, they're rather larger than I've had for quite a few years, so I'm having to adjust to a larger lens surface!

Talking of earl yyworkmen ................ OH finally managed to find an electrician who cam with good recommendations to look at the long tube lights in our basement. We've had problems with them for 3 or months as at least 3 have gone out but we haven't been able to find the right bulbs .................. the problem with an old house, the bulbs are no longer made, the electrician said this morning so he went off to find the correct replacements.

He will be back tomorrow morning between 8 and 9 am. :-0

We don't normally get up, or at least dressed and moving around, before 9 or 9:30 am

I'm not looking forward to having to get up around 7 am!

All of this administration so head banging Joan. We spent a long time this morning trying to change our address and phone number on the various savings accounts. It should be easily done on line,but it wasn’t . Some of them we couldn’t find where to do it, so had to ring up. Some you could change your address on line, but had to ring up to change the phone number. The premium bonds should have been easy, but with this new two factor authorisation you have to get a code sent to your mobile. I wasn’t getting the code, it turns out someone at their end had inputted my mobile number wrongly. I couldn’t tell that because they only show the first two and last two numbers with a load of asterisks in the middle.
It took well over an hour, but it is mainly done now.

The fitter arrived to put the new flooring down at an ungodly 8. 15am. He has been doing really well, but had to leave 2.45 to collect his daughter from nursery because she is ill. He promised he will be back early in the morning.

Hi Florence, They have only asked for a letter of explanation & my original B cert, they have already seen that & they have also seen the Marriage cert.

They have also seen variuos official statements (State pension, Bank etc )
& Utility bills (Electric, Council Tax etc )
I'm climbing the walls with it all.

I agree £50 is very welcome & LOT to me, but it's not a lot from the Pension folk !

edited to add....... the various official letters & household bills ALL have my name showing as Joan.

Joan.

Oh dear Joan, I can imagine how stressy this is for you.

I suggest you compose a letter explaining what your full name assigned at birth was and send your birth cert and marriage cert by registered post with tracking.

But, make a copy of both certs before you send them.

it will cost extra for reg & tracking but that way, you can trace and see when it is delivered.

Does your marriage cert show your full name?

£50 a week when you are a pensioner is a lot of money ie £200 a month which will help hugely.

Hopefully sending the letter & certs this time will sort the matter out soon.

And so it goes on !!

Juat had an email from R Mail Pension folk asking for a covering letter & my original Birth certificate to be sent by POST.

I am absolutely cheesed off with all of this, the other day we spoke to someone on the phone who advised us to send an email explaining the situation regarding never having had a Dr licence or Passport & pointing out that they had already seen my original B cert.
Now we have to do the above all over again.

I really feel like telling them they can stuff the pension but I can't afford to !
It's not as if it's a huge amountl of money, approx £50 per week.

Joan.

Well such a beautiful day here and no wind so daughter and i went out into the garden and resorted pots, weeded and christened the new fork making lots of holes for the grass seeds. Might have to paint the wooden planters as they have faded over the winter and look rather shabby now so another job on the list to do.

Joan, when you make a will and you need to make a new one now, you can ask sol for advice re your name etc. It was only a few years ago, I forced my dad into making a will as he has property etc and if he died without making one, that would create a huge heap of problems for me. We do now have it all in place thank goodness.

Also my brother & sil decided to do a Power of Attorney and named myself & her brother on the forms but.... when I went to sign the forms, they had put my shortened version of my name(what people call me) and not my actual full name so it all had to be sent back to the sol and redone...all 30 pages!!

I'm not wanting to worry or stress you in any way but think you should ask your sol for advice.

My roses are doing well too and my hydrangea has lots of growth as well. Dwarf geraniums have come on a lot too.

Sounds like we are all going to have colourful gardens this year as long as we get some sun!

Off to have a rest and some lunch now.

Florence in the hebrides

Hello ArgyllGran, re cooking for one, I do prefer tradition cooking/meals & I have always cooked from scratch, & sometimes I find it hard going doing the same for just me.
I am not overly keen on freezing full meals & much prefer to cook a "fresh" meal each day.

I have got my meat purchases down from what I used to buy, anything that comes in twos (Ch breasts. chops) I split, the same with sausages, I like fresh mince but that is easy enough to split into smaller portions.

It's just the actual cooking for one i don't like, over the years i have gone from 7 in the household, & now down to just me, such a change in my cooking habits it takes some getting to grips with !
I dare say I will get there eventually.

The sun has come out so maybe I will be able to get outside & finish off a couple of gardening jobs after all.

Joan.

A lovely sunny spring day here, too.

From the kitchen window I've been watching a robin busily building a nest. It gathers up dead leaves, and takes them into a hole in the bank at the back of the house.
It seems a very vulnerable place to build - I hope the local cats don't find it.

Joan, for ideas for cooking for one, I find Miguel Barclay's "One Pound Meals" books helpful. All the recipes are for one person.

Another one I like is "5 Ingredients 10 Minutes" by Jules Clancy. Recipes are mostly for two people, but easy to scale down.
They're so easy, they're hardly recipes at all, but more like ideas for putting ingredients together, and with lots of variations suggested for each recipe.

If you prefer more traditional cookery, perhaps you can find a second-hand copy of Delia Smith's "One is Fun" - now out of print, but copies available on eBay and Amazon, among other places..

Also, there's lots of stuff online.
For example:

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5774513/cooking-for-one-mark-three/p1

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/5520090/meals-for-one

Morning to you all.
Todays weather is not so nice at the moment, a bit dull & looking out of the window there must have been a wee shower, so that has scuppered what I was going to do in the garden.

Yesterday was a nice day apart from the wind, which stopped me from doing more jobs I had planned for the garden.
The Snowdrops are beginning to fade but the Crocus are putting on a lovely show & the Daffies are aslo starting to bloom.
I can see new growth on other plants, Roses, Potentilla Ferns & the 4 brand new Clematus that I planted up last Autumn are also showing buds, really please about the Clematus as I wasn't sure if they would survive the high winds & icy days.

Our youngest daughter (in Lanark) is coming for a visit on Saturday, she is bringing the youngest child (nearly 3yrs) with her staying until Monday, soo looking forward to seeing them.

Florence, I really can't see me changing/reversing my name back to my birth name, I have been Joan all my days & have used it on all offical things for many many years.
It's only hubbys Private Royal Mail Pension folk that are having an issue, ALL other offiacial places have never had a problem with which name I am known under.

Well I must go & have a tidy round, not that there's much to tidy, just the bed to make, not sure what to have for my tea, I don't find it easy thinking up meals for just me.

Hope everyone is well & your weather is better than ours today.

Joan.

Morning all.

Lovely sunny spring day here and not too chilly in the sun but cooler in the shade but overall a nice day. I shall be going outside soon to have a wander round and maybe a short walk if legs allow!

Had a nice surprise from the electric company today on mums flat. I submitted a new reading and for some reason, they reversed 4 months worth of charges and we are now in credit??? Only about 5 units have been used in last month but i don't understand the reverse charges, however I'm not going to ask lol.

Been busy this morning sending emails chasing up appointments and replies....it never ends does it?

made a lovely veggie bake last night using up the veg, cauliflower, mushrooms, red & white onions etc. made a cheese sauce using a tub of herb & garlic philly and then scattered some grated cheese on top. In the oven for about 20 minutes.

Well it was sooo tasty. all the best dishes are not made to recipe but those that are thrown together, well that's what I think.

Hope everyone else has the sunshine we have :-D

Florence in the hebrides

Morning all

Its still gales here as its coming to the Spring Equinox and thats why. After Sunday, it settles down hopefully.

I have 2 Christian names and my middle name was after grandads sister and his mother and a few females further back, a family name. I gave my daughter the same middle name and also my niece was given it too. But i never actually use it.

My first name is rather long, so friends and family shortened it plus old friends from old work days have their own pet name for me. But all my legal things have my correct full name on them.

I'm still not dressed lol as was busy sorting out updating utility bills with submitting readings etc for the flat as haven't been done in ages!!

Joan, please don't apologise for not posting. You have more than enough to deal with just now and if you are busy in your garden weather permitting, then that's great for you. Just let us know now & then that you are ok so we don't worry about you.

Sylvia, I hope you enjoy your visit and the weather is kind so you can go out together somewhere. The problem up here re names is that they have Gaelic versions of English names and use them to register with drs etc and that causes a lot of confusion. Eg In England you have Malcolm but in Gaelic it is Callum. But many people I know called Callum are actually Malcolm on their BC so it is very confusing at times. So Callum Alasdair is actually Malcolm Alexander but in England they would be 2 different names altogether

Right have a good day all. off to shower and get dressed before lunchtime lol

Florence in the hebrides

I have two names.
There is a male name that has gone down through the generations and I now wonder if my parents knew that my second name had once been a family name. It is tha nmae of my fathers grandmother, who he wouldn't have known, and her mother.

Good morning all. 10 degrees here but very grey at the moment. Still it is early, woke up at 0530 and couldn't get back to sleep. Not dressed yet though.
Good to see you posting Joan. Don't worry about not posting, we all know your situation. One which takes a lot of getting used to and it is good to get outside and do jobs. three years ago I found that helped and I still do. <3 Come on here when you are ready.

Sylvia. OH only had one name, luckily I had two as our first initial was the same which would have been difficult for official things like banks. Son we gave three names but he hates one of them so doesn't ever use it. daughter has two names but hates her second name so ignores it. I do wonder about the current generation of babies. what will they think of some of the weird names they have been given,
We too have unseasonable warmer weather at the moment but are in for a cold snap shock at the weekend.

Good to see you posting, Joan <3 <3 I do hope that you get that darn pension sorted soon. It's unbelievable hat it should take so long :-(

It's hard to realise that we will also celebrate 57 years in August. It also rained on that day, but we also got held up going to the reception by a herd of cows being taken for milking :-D

Linda ....... I feel tired reading all that you guys are doing! We no longer have that energy, unfortunately.

Re names. I only have 1 name but always longed to have 2 like my brother who had our mother's maiden name as the second name.

OH has 3 names and then his surname .... the Scottish version of an English name, the name of his mother's deceased brother, and his paternal grandmother's maiden name. His father also had his mother's surname, and ran his business using both that and his surname as there was another business in the same city that was owned by someone with the same surname. So he was always known as Mr. A B, instead of Mr B

Result was that OH also became known as Mr A B Jr.

After we got married, we knew that anyone who contacted us using that Mr A B name must come from Chester! It took at least 20+ years before we never heard that!

We do have a problem of remembering which names and/or initials he has used for various things.

When our daughter was born I gave her 2 names, C D, intending C to be used. But I realised that there was then a very famous person in Canada who was always known for using the initials C D. I decided that might not be a good idea as it could lead to teasing, so told the nurses that her name would be D C to be known as C, but they all called her by D. UGH!

I managed to catch OH before he went to register her birth, and so she is legally C D.

We have a niece who was called E F, to be known as E and was until she reached her mid- to late teens when she decided she wanted to be known under the 2nd name. Took the family a long time to remember, her maternal grandmother (my sis-i-l) never did use the second name. One of my 1st cousins did the same thing, but her sisters didn't like the change, so most commonly called her by both names, much to her annoyance!

We're having a few days of record weather ............. a high pressure ridge offshore is directing warmer than normal temperatures, sun and blue sky to us! Yesterday's official temperature was 15.8C, breaking a record for the date set back in 1900 :-0
The nights are down to 6 or 7C, so nice and comfortable. All the spring shrubs and flowers are budding and/or in full flower! Back to rain and colder temperatures mid-week.

Some nice news today for us .......... our daughter is going to be able to visit us for about 6 days in early May as part of a business trip. She will only have to pay half of the airfare as the group will pay the rest of her return trip home. But she will have to stay in a local hotel about 10-15 minutes walk away as we don't have a spare room, and also get up much later than she does. So we will pay the hotel bill for her.

Take care everyone

Evening all.

Good to see you posting Joan :-D

I know many people that are known by their middle name like my Aunty but for anything official, like bank, pension tax etc, you have to have the name that is on your birth certificate/marriage .

Joan, once you have sorted out your hubby's pension, can I make a suggestion that you go through all your accounts with your daughter etc and if necessary change the account name to show your actual name as on your BC.

People will still call you Joan but its for legal stuff and one day when you are no longer here, your children will struggle with probate etc if your name isn't correct.
It's better to get it all sorted now and then you wont have to worry about things.

When I went through my divorce, i had a similar problem as the name on my marriage cert for my ex husband was not the same as his name on his BC! So the divorce papers had to be redone which delayed things. If you were to look up a marriage using the name he put, you wouldn't find it as that person doesn't" exist".
After i got married and realised I then had to get the drs, dentist, hospital, HMRC etc all changed to his correct name. he didn't think went he went to his sol to tell them about the name on the marriage cert being incorrect. I thought maybe it meant I wasnt legally married to him but no such luck.

Anyway, sorry you have had all this upset to deal with.

The day went downhill here and gales rain and more rain so blooming awful. heating is on and drawn the blinds.

Just settling down ready for the soaps tonight. Corrie is interesting with Lauren who has disappeared.

Linda, wanting cash is so he can put some through the books and keep some back. This way he can keep his income below a level so as not to pay a higher amount of tax! Hope you OH can cope with all the sanding and painting? But it will keep him out of mischief lol

Well off to put the kettle on and get my blanket for my legs as they are freezing.

Florence in the hebrides

My children only have one name as well Joan. I don’t know why, but while I was having my first baby, I thought it was a girl, so had selected a girls name. There was no chance of including my mother’s name as the poor thing would have been saddled with Gertude :-(. Even my mum hated her own name. During the war when she went away from home to join the ATS, the girls were all introducing themselves and she said she hated her name, so someone said well chose a new name, so she chose Babs, short for Barbara. So when she met my father, he and all his side of the family always called her Babs, whereas her side called her Gert.
My first baby turned out to be a boy and that floored me as I hadn’t thought of any boys names. OH chose one and registered it within a couple of days. I was so shattered after the birth, that I went along with it, but to be honest, I have never really liked it. I regretted not adding James as a middle name in honour of my father and all the past generations , so when the second one was coming along,I decided on Andrew James, but it turned out to be a girl, so she only has one name like her brother.

Hello Argyllgran & Linda.
It iss o hard AG, so many memories & the simplest tof hings start me off.
I find listening to music the most difficult, we both loved most of the 60's stuff & different songs throw up a particular memory.

Linda, we didn't mind paying a bill with cash whenever we had work done as the workman always took off the VAT that way.
I loathe vat, especialy on household fuel bills & feel it should be stopped.
I had a delivery of heating oil last week & my bill is almost £373 of which almost £18 is vat !

As for names, our 5 children were only given 1 name, I just don't see the point of giving children several names in a certain order & then not using the 1st one, just seems daft to me, lol.

Joan.

I’m too have the name problem Joan. It is a tradition on my father’s side of the family that everyone uses their middle names. It is the same for me that I have always been called by my middle name, but anything official has my first name on it. So driving licence, passport, NHS etc all use my real first name . In the old days when we used cheques people would write them out to me using my middle name as that was what they knew me as, but the bank would cash them. Then things started to change and they wouldn’t accept them, so I had to make sure that people put the correct name on them. I find that more and more I am answering to my real first name, it is only friends and family who use my middle name.

Things are progressing with the house, a huge pile of wood flooring arrived this afternoon in preparation for Wednesday when the fitter is coming. I paid the rest of the invoice yesterday, but the fitter wants to be paid in real cash. A scam no doubt as he won’t be declaring all his earnings. I have already been to the cash machine twice as there is a daily limit on the amount you can get out. I will have to go again.
The new dining table arrived this afternoon as well, but it is in the garage, so hasn’t been unpacked yet. We will have to move most of the things out of the lounge before Wednesday, but the two sofas will have to stay as they are really heavy, so we will just have to carry the from on side to the other. OH took the sink and toilet out of the downstairs loo this morning, luckily they came out without much problem. He has a large pile of skirting boards in the garage all of which have to be sanded and repainted before they can go back, o that is going to be a very slow job. We have chosen the new colour for the walls, but he has decided that he is going to do the painting, so that is going to take an age as well.

I forgot that you are a vegetarian Florence. My daughter went through that phase when she was a teenager, so I was very adapt at cooking vegetables food. We usually have vegetarian dishes three times a week even now.

The first year is the hardest, Joan, with all the first special dates - first birthday, first Christmas, first anniversary, etc, without the person who would previously have shared them with you.

After that, it does gradually get easier.

I understand that everyone is very keen to prevent fraud these days - but your pension situation seems ridiculously tied up with red tape.
I hope it's sorted out soon.
Perhaps a letter from a solicitor or GP would help, confirming that you are always known by your middle name?

Bright, sunny, and breezy here today, and not cold.
A lovely change!


EDIT approx 16:30 -
but now it's raining!

Good afternoon to everyone.
I am so sorry not to have been chatting recently but to be honest I haven't been able for it, I am finding things really difficult at the moment with the slightest thing setting off the tears.
Today it would have been our 57th wedding anniversary & I have been rather upset whilst remembering what a lovely day we had all those years ago.

................................................................................................

We have a lovely day today, the sun is out ,the sky is blue, flat calm & warm, just like it was on our wedding day except it was VERY windy on that day.
We have had several nice days recently but it's been chilly but yesterday & today it has been soo nice I managed to get out into the garden, planted up a few more Primroses yesterday, & today I managed to clear away the few piles of branches from the gravelled areas.

I have been reading about everyones adventures & you all sound very busy, especially Linda & hubby, goodness me Linda what a pair of busy bees.

Once again we have had to contact the Royal Mail Pension folk re Jacks pension, it is now almost 2 months since Jack died & I am no further on with his RM pension being amended.

All the relevant forms have been sent to them including several lots of paperwork to identify ME but still they want more !
Letter is now asking for proof of who I am via my birth certifiacate, Dr licence & Passport.
I have never driven a car & never had a Passport.

Because I am known by the name of JOAN whereas my B cert shows my name as Evelyn Joan "they" want further proof that Joan & Evelyn Joan are one & the same person, I am 77yrs of age & I have never been known by the name of Evelyn, I have been JOAN forever, Utility billls, my State Pension, the Bank, everything, all show me as Joan & all those places were sorted without any issue regarding who I am etc..

These R Mail people have already seen my B cert & several Utility bills but they are not happy, my daughter managed to speak to someone this morning regarding the latest letter etc & we have been told to send an email or letter explaining the situation.
We asked how much longer all this would take in regards of getting hubbys pension sorted & was told between 1 & 3 months !!!! Nightmare.

Well that's all for now, it's been nice chatting to you all, I will try to get back to the thread more often.
Thankyou for being there, take care.

Joan.