General Chat

While they were out blackberrying the old man and his friend picked up a lot of little plum like fruit from the side of the road.I don't know what they are but they are not wild fruit,must come from an ornamental plum.Anyway,I have made a crumble with them.
Hope they are not poisonous but I don't really care because I don't like crumble!
Hope they don't get too enthusiastic with stuff from off the road.I don't know how I would cook dead fox.Could do with a bit of horse dung though,for the rhubarb of course!

Well I'm back, somewhat shattered but on my feet. MiniMary's weeJack Russell terrier succumbed to lymphoma on Wednesday, less than a week from tentative diagnosis (now confirmed). we have made it through a lot of hysteria and hoping for miniM to come out the other side, relatively unscathed. She has taken it very hard, already has issues with anxiety and i was terrified she was going to crack.

unfortunately,a few hours later, I developed a very severe migraine headache, rapid onset with slurred speech, so found myself being transported to hospital with possible stroke. mercifully it was deemed to be 'just' a headache. Still feel a bit wonky but am at least upright.LOL. Then yesterday had awful chest pain, was about to go back to the hospital when I realised that in actual fact, i am a gas bag!!!!! Apparently the result of some very delicious (and spicy) chili con carne.

Shrron, I laugh about the blackberries, megan brought a quart of huge blackberries home from work this week, but before I could turn them into jam, Sarah had eaten the lot. yesterday Meg brought home peaches so we are going to make peach jam today. if I can stay awake long enough!!

Not too much energy to say or write much, but just know I am thinking of you all, and hoping for Liz to have a relatively crisis-free weekend.
Mary

Oh Mary, poor, poor mini Mary.
How do you explain that to her??
I was coming on to say... how are you all doing?, after reading your message, my mind went to that wee girl. Bless her.
I just pray that the luck in your family turns suddenly and you all get a touch of 'gold' in your lives.

See you all tomorrow, if you are here.
I have been a bit 'out of sorts myself, but what's new?
I am getting well again.... a weekly habit of mine, so it never comes as a shock to me, although Allan said, he thought he was going to have to 'break out the shovel the other day'.... It seems I looked dreadful.
How did he know?
It is not as if I look beautiful any other day. ;-0)

Good night all.
Love Deanna XXXXX

Thanks Deanna, actually I continue to be concerned for miniM, shehas spent the day clutching thedog's blanket, toy and halloween costume. She seems speech-regressed, nodding rather than speaking,and frequent little tears running down her cheek. So very sad to watch.She's 13 years old, but pretty naiive, has no friends that call regularly, I hear myself describing someone with depression. When friends visit ,she has a good time, behaves appropriately but on her own,seems to regress. Hasn't slept in her own room since Tuesday,seems uncomfortable going in there; as a result I've been sleeping in a chair so she can relax and sleep with me close to her, in the lounge.

I made two batches of jam today with peaches and nectarines, hoped she would work alongside me, but she chose to withdraw further, usually loves helping me in the kitchen. I really am frightened for her, having had depression myself since the age of 7 years, I feel her pain.

Thanks for listening,
Mary.

Poor wee girl, too much for her to handle really.
AND... jut to show you haw much of a friend I am Mary
I have just sent you an e-mail asking for your help.
DELETE it and get on with your own very full life.
you do not need an idiot like me giving you extras
to think about.
You must be exhausted Mary.
Lots of love... Deanna XXXX

And to anyone else on here today who may need
a bit of a hug.... share these , I do love a cuddle.
Deanna XX (((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))

What you are describing is a little girl grieving Mary.Depression is when you feel like that and your dog hasn't just died.

Mary, I think Sharron is correct.
"Depression is when the dog hasn't died" but if it goes on for several weeks it may yet be depression. Mary is grieving, which is normal-- her doggie might not be a life-long companion like a spouse, but in another way it was. It was obviously Mary's special friend.
Maybe give her a cuddle from us.
xx Colin

Hi all, my friend's dog also died today.
He was an old man but a very well loved old man and she has had him since a puppy.
Bless her, she is in a sad state too worse than normal as she is pregnant and everything is a 'blown up' emotion.

How is minimary now?
And thank you again for your help Mary... working on it now....

Good night all, and I hope we see more of each other after the bank holiday.
Missing you all.
Deanna XXXX

Thanks for your comments, BUT, Ihave beenconcernedthat miniMary is depressed for some time now and this eventhasexacerbated her symptoms. we are arranging counselling with a psychologist to help her deal withsome of her issues whichstill are foremost in her mind -family breakup between her parents, the daily stress of two sibs with special needs, the expressed feelings that she and Em are not as special as the others because they don't need so much attention and money spent on them.
She also deals with a lot of anger towards her father whose parental efforts are less than effective or appropriate. he promised her that he would pay for her to go to the school which other friends attend (their school declared bankruptcy and she had to leave). her tuition had been partially paid because her mother did some work for the school, but the new school was just too expensive. She misses those friends and frequently comments that her daddy didn't do what he said he would.

Her coping skills are not well-developed, though she is wonderful with her sibs.
The new School term begins next week and I am trying to arrange to take the 2 girls away for a few days before it starts, for some fun and a break from the chaos. For all 3 of us. if it can be worked out, does anyone want to join me in Florida? The girls are totally unaware of my plans so I hope it will be a great surprise for them!!
Sorry to rattle on, I am painfully aware of the symptoms of depression, as I have had it for over 50 years. and had real concerns, long before the dog passed away. Thank you Colin for the hugs, I have passed it onto mini.

Poor mini Mary, you can see why she gets so down, she does have a lot of perceived problems and, no matter how much you try to make up to her for her Daddy's failure Mary she is not going to forget them. Nobody could do more than you but it is hard on a little girl to carry the weight of two siblings with special needs. I do hope that you can fix this holiday for her and that counselling will help her. I guess she needs to feel special in some way. What does she really enjoy doing, is there anything there that you could use to make her feel better about herself? I don't think you need to feel guilty though as you do so much for all of them, it is just circumstance. and losing her special 'friend' is the last straw for her.

Deanna, you will see I am back, so will be around to chat.

Sorry not to have been on for ages my computer has a virus, (so using Hayleys while it is here).
My Dad was taken to hospital Tuesday night I was there with my Mum and sister. We were told he had pneumonia at first. Then next morning they said it was gall stones (like last year, when he was sent home having nothing done). Now they have told us he has a stone stuck in a tube and his kidneys have failed. His other organs are giving up. The fluid in his urine bag is nearly black. We were told by a Dr he might not make it through the night and his chances of leaving hospital are very slim. Dad has been told, he had good spirits and was smiling. Will keep you all intouch.
Love Carole xx

Poor little girl. How fortunate that she has an understanding grandmother.

However,if you had not listed all those things and had said she was very down then I would have thought she had some sort of illness.Poor little Mary is reacting as anybody would under such a shower of shot.

I was treated for depression when I was a teenager when,in retrospect,I can see that I was quite justifiably,desperately unhappy and pre-occupied with making some sort of sense of my misfortune.

Unhappy and bewildered isn't ill but it can make you ill.

Thinking of her and poor Carole.Good luck with your dad.

Carole sorry to hear about your Dad, I hope he is not suffering too much. Thinking of you all

Carole, I am so sorry about your lovely dad.
I did not even see the report you put up about him, so it must have seemed to you that I did not care.
I do, very much.
Bless him, I hope he is a bit better today.
God Bless,
Deanna XXXX

Carole sending you hugs, love your Dad, I hope he can be provided some relief from his pain and anxiiety.
Love,mary

Carole, have been thinking about you and your Dad, hope he is not in pain and maybe a miracle can happen for him and you.
Take care,

Lizxxx

Carole, is there any news on your Dad, he is still in my thoughts.

I am off on holiday for a month tomorrow. Should still be on line though, maybe not as much.

Hi Carole,How is your Dad getting on sending postive rhoughts and prayers for you and your Mum ,and all the family
gentle((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))for you , and hope he isnt in alot of pain
Dutchxx

Carole, I am also thinking of you about your dad. Hope all is well.

Maximary, I am also concerned for Minimary. What you said a couple of days back makes sense. I think a lot of teenagers go through a lot of lows, but this one seems particularly bad. More than just her dog dying, it sounds as if that was just the thing that tipped her over an edge.
Hello Dutch, I saw you there.
A few thoughts for my BIL (sister's husband). About 3 months ago he had a hip replacement. Some weeks later an infection took hold so they had to take it out, leaving him with no hip joint on that side which rather limits his ability to move around. He was due to have it put back on Tuesday, but when they opened it up it still had infection. From the way my sister described it, it is one of the nasty ones so 2 weeks more of different antibiotics then another wait until it can go in again.
He needs patience, my sister needs support as she is struggling a bit but doesn't want to admit it. After all, it was her older brother and sister that have mood disorders. Not her. Not much. Relatively speaking she seems OK but not brilliant at the moment.

To those I haven't mentioned Eileen and the rest of you know who you are. xxColin

my "black dog" has returned its is and unpredictable and often ferocious beast it chases away reason and confidence and leave in its wake fear and self doubt, it makes question motives and your worth. I am not alone many people have their own "black dogs", the politician and Iconic states man Winston Churchill was one fo the first to call his depression a "Black Dog" and just look at what he managed to achieve.