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Hello, my husband and i have been looking for a few years now to find a young man who we think is called Mathew but was never confirmed. We were also told he lived in the Newbury area. Our son Nigel is now sadly deceased and we never knew wether he had a son or not although we had offered help it was never confirmed.
However this christmas one of his friends came to see us and has confirmed that yes Nigel did have a son and he had seen him when he was 4. we do believe he is called Mathew now, not sure 1t or 2tt.

Nigel lived and worked in the swindon area at a pub called the longs bar, he also worked at a sand blasting company. Nigel lived in swindon around 1980, Mathew will have been born about 1990 making him about 28, we have little information of Nigel's time in swindon or his life there, we do not have a surname for Mathew which makes it more difficult for us, as grandparents we tried to offer help but this was rejected. Any information would be appreciated.

thank you Pam and Richard Kelly

Hi Pam, just a thought....assuming the fathers' surname is known and G/son "may" have been registered under that name
on the free b m d site, you can search for surnames, you appear to have a first name (Matthew) and approx dates,
it could be a place to start...

Does the friend remember the name of the child’s mother? Is there a Swindon social media page you can post on? It might be best not to mention a child, just say you’re looking for anyone who knew your son. Respondents may hold a vital piece of information.
It’s always possible that the child may have been raised believing someone else was his biological father.

Unfortunately, there are nearly a 1000 Mathew or Matthew births registered in 1991 +/- 1 in Swindon.

Poster says he is called Matthew NOW. Suggests to me that he was adopted and had name changed. Could be mistaken of course

Yes, that is true. On the other hand 'Matthew' was seen when he was aged about 4. Children are usually adopted away from birth family &, even if adopted by a subsequent partner, are less likely to have their first forename changed.

Isn't it interesting how we read things differently?

I read the O.P as that Pam had thought that the grandson was Mathew, but since the Christmas time visit she was now sure of that.

A search for a Matthew / Mathew child born in that area with surname and mother's maiden name the same should narrow the field a bit.

Gwyn in Kent , I came to the same conclusion and if year and area are correct only five births match that criteria have sent PM

Bobtanian

Just for information, freebmd appears to have 0% births from 1990 transcribed.

Also, I read as definitely Mat(t)hew.

Hi
I am a close family friend supporting pam and dick with their search, so originally Pam and dick were told he could have been called Mathew but it was never confirmed. From what Pam and dick were told Nigel's name wasn't on the birth certificate.
Pam and dick have very little information as their son lived away from home and then sadly passed away. Pam and dick have never had any information regarding Mathew confirmed until christmas just gone when a friend of Nigel's turned up after finding out that myself, pam and dick were trying to search for Mathew. we were originally told it was Newbury area, we now believe it to be the swindon area as Nigel's friend had seen and confirmed he is called Mathew, he was born around 1990 and will be about 28 now. its so hard as we don't have Mathews mums name to trace. I do have a contact number for Nigel's friend so perhaps I could ask more questions there to support.
Thank you all kindly for your messages.

kind regards
Alison

Hi Pam, Dick and Alison

Just some ideas..... very possibly you’ve already had and executed the exact same ones!!.....

Google shows Longs Bar, Swindon is still in business and have a Facebook site (can’t look as I don’t use FB) it’s a long shot but how about posting on there asking if anyone remembers Nigel, I personally wouldn’t mention Mathew at this point......you just never know who still frequents the bar, nothing to loose?

You say Nigel was in Swindon around 1980, Mathew born 1990, surely he must have had more friends/girlfriends, been reasonably well known after 10yr+ especially working in a bar back then.....

Does Nigel’s friend remember where they were when he met Mathew as a 4yr old, an address, who was he with.....does he remember any more friends Nigel had?

Mistyx

Hi Misty
Thank you so much. I am on face book so i am going to put a post on. I didn't cross our minds to look on face book....
The guy in question went to school with Nigel in our home town and lives away now but must have lived near him i guess in Swindon, these are questions I can ask for and with Pam and Dick.
Pam and Dick didn't have much information on Nigel's life in Swindon only what Nigel had told them.
Thank you for the idea

Kind Regards Alison :-)

Hi Alison

Another thought......doesn’t require an answer as it’s very personal.

If Pam and Dick don’t have Nigel’s death certificate and he died in Swindon, might be worth buying it to find address and informants name....another contact for information possibly.

Mistyx

Would it be worth changing the heading on this post to Show Nigel's full name? That way, if his son googled his father's name, this thread may show up.

A postem added on Freebmd to Nigel's birth registration may also help should his son decide to look for his birth father's family.

yes ile do that. thanks for the advice

kind regards

Alison :-)

'A postem added on Freebmd to Nigel's birth registration may also help should his son decide to look for his birth father's family.'

As stated previously, freebmd not yet transcribed for 1990.

Sorry Patchem. I did mean a postem to Nigel's birth (as he has passed away) not Matthew's.