Genealogy Chat

What a sad situation. Let us know how you go on. We care about you after all this time.

Meg

hi Jan

I look forward to it, good luck and i am thinking of you:))

Lynn

How lovely Lynn, and so glad I played a part! Very encouraging. Will let you know how it goes.
Jan

Hi Jan

Just want to let you know, that after a lot of searching on here (with YOUR help) i am about to meet a relative who is 97 years old, her family have only just found out that this lady's brother was married and had 4 daughters (one of them is my mum) they are a little shocked to say the least but are busy collecting photo's and information for me in anticipation of our meeting, i hope when you make contact with your relative it will be an exciting and happy outcome.

Lynn

Thanks for the replies everyone.

Madmeg, I should explain that the Powell family was totally fragmented some years ago. My grandfather was born in 1896, one of seven, and by 1920 his parents and 4 of his siblings had emigrated to Canada. All contact was eventually lost. Of those who remained in the UK he only kept in touch with one sister (who lived about 100 miles away) and contact with her family broke down after they both died, about 40 years ago I would say. I think without the central figures of his parents everyone drifted.

The lady I wish to contact is the daughter of the eldest son, and my mother never met him or his family.

LInda - I am now in touch with descendants of all siblings except this one, so I know for a fact this lady knows none of her Powell cousins. I am as certain as I can be that she has no children (I have looked myself and also asked for others to look on here) so I haven't the option of contacting the younger generation unfortunately.

Thanks for the interest folks, I do appreciate it very much.

Jan

Just wondering Jan although you say your mother's cousin lives alone does she have immediate family.... any sons or daughters?

The reason I ask this is because although my mum will be 90 this year she still lives on her own in our home village...as an only child I live some 20 odd miles away. I hasten to add this is of her choice even though I, my OH and her grandchildren have badgered her to move to be near us.

Although she has some health issues mum still lives a very active and independent life within the village community. Her one issue is that she would appreciate that people would not treat her in patronising ways...in her words "I may be well on in years but I am not thick". She is not on her own many of her friends in their 80s and 90s feel the same.

So what I am trying to say is go for it. If there were any issues with such a contact letter to mum she would ask me or my OH for advice just to make sure....however she would definitely be up for any contact with distant cousins.

Linda x

Good luck jan
xxx



as for me .................. I'm still mentally composing the letter




Hi Meg



sylvia
xxx

Jan, I was musing over this, and wondered why your mother had not been in touch with her own cousin. Is there a reason? My mum only had one cousin, and she was an important lady to us. Why were you not in touch with your mum's cousin?

There are some sad stories in this thread.

So, Jan, here is the letter.
"Hiya Mary,

You won't remember me but your Mam (do Brummies use Mam?) and mine were cousins. My mam's dad Joe and your mam's dad Fred were brothers,. That makes us cousins.

I don' remember uncle Joe, but I do remember our Grandad John. He was a great fella, wasn'the?

And other such rubbish. Just to get contact if you can.

Sylvia, keep trying.

Magaret

Good luck!!

Well, the cert arrived very promptly and no doubt it is her! Planning to compose my letter tomorrow, wish me luck.
Jan

Let us know what happens Sylvia. Best of luck!
I have sent for the marriage cert which ill confirm 100% that i have the right person before I write so will be a couple of weeks before I take the plunge.
Jan

Thanks to Contrary Mary, I now have the full names and addresses of the 2 people


Guess what I will be doing this weekend?!

Hello everyone. You have been busy! I think the message here is to act while there is time.
That's a good idea Madmeg, thanks.
Jan

Hi Jan

You might also add something along the lines of "if you are unsure as to whether to reply to me or not, please ask a member of your family to do it for you". It might just add a bit of reassurance,

Sappho

Thanks for that


I am so sorry to hear your story. It's heartbreaking


Unfortunately, I've already been through this

My uncle was my mother's younger brother, and the last survivor of the family. Just as I am the last surviving member in this generation because my Mum was the only one to have children, and my only sibling died in 1990.

Uncle died suddenly in 1991. I left it about 6 months before I sent a letter to Aunt E at the end of which I said that I would be delighted to have any papers etc referring to his family . There had been other contact between us during those months, but I thought I was being gentle, and didn't want to upset her too much by asking too soon.

The reply??

"I burnt everything to do with the xxxxx family as I thought no-one would be interested."


That meant all documents, certificates, photographs, grandfather's WW1 medals ........... the list goes on.


I will make contact with her nephew.




sylvia

Hi Jan

I realy hope you send your letter and contact your relative, good luck:))

Lynn

TLIR


that's how we started back in November, when I got the first real indication that she might have died.

Unfortunately, both her christian name and surname are very common in the area

My niece also tried ...... and tried contacting every hospital and care home in the area. She ended up producing a very general letter that she addresses to The Occupant, of the 6 neighbouring houses ... and this is what led to the contact.

Sylvia in Canada,
Presumably you know your aunt's surname and where in UK she lived? Have you tried finding the website of the local paper for that area and seeing if you can search the "Family Notices"?
I know that I can do it for my local paper and it would give you her date of death and possibly where funeral was taking place

Thanks Kay. Decided then - will go for it!
Appreciate the support folks.
Jan

Do it and do it now,,I lost a very important chance by sitting on the fence just that bit too long..
You dont have to be too heavy,but theres every chance this lady would be delighted to get a hand written letter.