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When searching for a birth rellie

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Penny

Penny Report 19 May 2013 19:17

The chap grew up with as a brother was born to a 15 year old mother. He died aged 29 - That's one mum that will never find her child even if she wanted to . I do know his birth name and would tell her about his life if I saw her looking ...but not everyone is like me.

jax

jax Report 19 May 2013 15:01

Also you cannot find out whether the adopted person actually lived past childhood, so would never come looking for birth family in that case.

Penny

Penny Report 19 May 2013 14:33

Helping an adoptee - who of course, by the time they start looking will have furnished themselves with their birth name, is one game

Its the other way round that's the problem, when you don't have a clue who your 'sibling' became that it gets sticky. you can look for as many records as you like for Angelina Pickitsbottom-smiff but they wont be her !

Janet

Janet Report 19 May 2013 09:20

Having said that Sylvie I have helped two adopted friendsof mine (the one I mentioned above) plus another,to locate some of their living birth relatives.

They both had distinctive names to work with so it was not (all that) difficult to do. I did have some lovely help from one of our members who worked in the area I was searching and she managed to view some baptism records for me, which confirmed the findings.

(Not all), but most of both families have been very welcoming, intrigued, interested, astounded, once contact was made. Both have met some relatives in the flesh now. You have to be careful with some though, use some common sense. Age, infirmity, etc

From this little piece of experience the younger members were more enthusiastic than the older ones and suprisingly the men have been more receptive than the women on the whole.

Just personal experience though

Jan

SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 19 May 2013 05:50

I think many, if not most, adoptees do not realise how hard it is to trace someone


Nor do many of them think ahead as to whether their appearance out of the blue will be welcomed by a birth parent.


The very tricky waters that have to be navigated is one reason why I very rarely help on the Living Relatives Board .............. apart from occasionally suggesting places to look to get information

Penny

Penny Report 18 May 2013 18:36

I have no idea how they do it Jax- I am trying to find a bith rellie at present, also given for adoption.

I know her birth name, and I am told that amongst out late mother possession was a letter from her ( found by our birth brother) .

So I know her birth name
The letter contains her Married name ( with a forename fortunately) But still I cannot pin her down because the (married) surname is just too Common.

All I have to go on it ( Forename) (because we don't know her surname ) marring a Mr Turner

It is possible if you get a few clues, and professiosnals that do have access to the records

jax

jax Report 18 May 2013 18:29

So if the info is not available to the public....are these people who reckon they can find an adopted person doing something illegally?

Penny

Penny Report 18 May 2013 18:23

no, Marie.


You only get one shot a the birth index. You are usual given a name by which to be registered, maybe only male or femail Bloggs, but it has to be registered.

Then, following adoption, the 'new name' goes on the adoption register - which is a different record

The child ( or its parents I guess) are then given a cert which reflects the name they have chosen for the child.

The two registers are NOT generally cross reference-able. Some people ( social workers and alike) do have ref to this info but NOT Joe Public

Janet

Janet Report 18 May 2013 17:34

I don't think so MC

I have a friend who was adopted in 1957, she has her birth cert in her original name, which says adopted on the far right of the cert

J

MarieCeleste

MarieCeleste Report 18 May 2013 17:23

Just out of curiosity, if a baby is adopted say around 1960 - would it's birth be re-registered in it's adopted name?

jax

jax Report 18 May 2013 16:01

I cannot say I have ever met an adopted person, if I have they have never told me so

Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 18 May 2013 15:31

"Actually HE might not know!"

A very good point to make; he might not even know that he is an adoptee.

Penny

Penny Report 18 May 2013 15:21

Is it helpful to be reminded that records past the date of an adoption will be in a adopted name and not a birth one? Do non adopted people realise this? I have no idea.

Do adopted people go around telling people their birth name? I wouldn't have thought so, certainly not commonly.

Despite what people think, I don't go round introducing myself ''Hi My name is penny, I am an adoptee'' Certainly not in the normal course of events anyway.

So The 'Fred Green Born 1963 in Middlepiddle'' Could be the bloke you know as John Brown and sit nest to him at work everyday...and you wouldn't know .

Actually HE might not know!

So what is the best way to track them down? There is no point in looking for Fred Green, and no, you cant be told what his name became. You can register your interest on his file, you can search trees on here , and on other sites of course all in that birth name.

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