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adoption/hints and hugs from other adoptees*Chapte

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Sue (Sylvia Z )

Sue (Sylvia Z ) Report 29 May 2005 05:57

Hi Jess, Jules, Lorraine and everyone, Back on thread one, which seems ages ago, I said I was looking for my Polish B/M. A new development has been that the kind Polish man in the Isle of Wight, who has been helping me, phoned. He has been in contact with a Polish lady who knew my B/M Krystyna during WW2 in a Signals regiment. This lady, Irena, has given him the phone number of another Polish lady, living in Spain, who also knew my mother. This lady in Spain wants me to phone her, too late last night, so will try early this evening as taking adoptive mother out for her birthday today (Sunday). What is so exciting is that the lady in Spain knew my B/M had had a baby and also that B/M emigrated to Canada after I was born. So the moral is .. NEVER GIVE UP, I have been searching for two years, needle in a haystack at times, but somehow every time I wonder if I will ever find Krystyna, a tiny bit of info turns up. I will let you know what happens. Love to everyone, thinking of those who are finding parents and family. Sue X

Sue

Sue Report 26 May 2005 20:22

hi Lorraine, how did viewing your file go on the 24th?.I will hopefully get to see mine very soon. From Sue

The Bag

The Bag Report 26 May 2005 13:50

How did the file opening session go on the 24th Lorraine?

The Bag

The Bag Report 25 May 2005 21:04

Unashamedly whacked back to the front!! Jess xx

Unknown

Unknown Report 24 May 2005 20:14

Christina, There are no hard and fast rules about contact. I have 2 half sisters one i have a good relationship with, the other I haven't made contact with. I also have a half brother who I have a good relationship with. Both my birth have died, Mum when I was 8 and dad 14 years ago. I did find Grandad (Dad's dad) thru his school's web site purly by chance. I emailed saying that I was looking for information on (name) born (when) from (area) and that I was wondering if they could be related. I didn't state why I wanted to know or who I was. Just my new name (adoptive). Grandad emailed back saying he was his father and to ring him with pleasure as there was much to say about him. Needless to say I rang the following day and all went swimmingly. Moral of the story. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Just send an email and be a little vague about who you are. Just ask if they are related to such a person etc and send it. Wishing you all the best. Jules xx

The Bag

The Bag Report 24 May 2005 19:49

Christina- tread carefully and with tact and caution. My father had 4 batches of children with 4 different women. He just kept moving on! The oldest son is dead - but HIS son is receptive.The 2nd born doesn't want to know, The 3rd born - have spoken to his wife (and his mother) but not him, and the eldest of the fourth batch of children knows of us and is okay, but doesn't want the others to know(MORE) The 3rd batch was a full sister , who like me was given for adoption.We have traced and are the very best of friends. So really it can go all ways or any ways- I would suggest contacting the eldest initially if you can and just gauge the reaction best of luck, let us know what the outcome is, wont you? jess

moe

moe Report 24 May 2005 19:35

Christina, if they are on this site then they are looking for relatives like the rest of us, (good or bad news) i think you should go ahead and make contact and Good Luck,MOE!

Sue

Sue Report 24 May 2005 17:34

Hi everyone, I have just spoken to lady at the Childrens society where my adoption file is held and it should be being sent out tomorrow recorded delivery to my social worker. thats my second bit of good news this week,not bad going I don't think. I am starting to get a little excited now as it feels like I am getting somewhere from sue

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 24 May 2005 15:18

havnt got her birth cert she was born in b,ham how do i apply for her cert angie

The Bag

The Bag Report 24 May 2005 14:27

angela- does her birth cert have a fathers name on it_ that would be your next step Jess

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 24 May 2005 14:25

has any one got ant tips on tracing birth grandparents my mother was born before my nan married my grandad so realy he is my step grandad my mother took on his name after they married so dont know what her real name was at birth my grandparents married 4yrs after my mother was born so it would of been 1950 and in the ladywood area of b,ham my grandad was called tom or thomas jones and my nan was francis but dont know maiden name very complicated family to say the least any tips would be helpfull best wishes angie

Julia

Julia Report 24 May 2005 07:42

Hi im sending loving vibes to lady having chemo treatment, all are hearts are with you God bless Julia x

Unknown

Unknown Report 23 May 2005 22:23

thanks for your kind words Angie and Julia. Jules xx

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 23 May 2005 22:06

special prayers been said for the lady recieving chemo i to have birth parents who dont want nothing to do with me but believe me the feeling is mutual even though it still hurts to know they still feel the same as they did 39yrs ago lots of love angie x

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 23 May 2005 21:40

dear julia what a lovely story,pulled a few heart strings when reading it good luck with the future i know just how you feel and how you felt about scared of been rejected its so lovely when everything works out god bless angie

The Bag

The Bag Report 23 May 2005 20:24

Well done sue- how exciting - hope it works out -kep us posted! Good luck for tommorow rainey Girl (Lorraine)- thinking of you too- hopefully you'll pop up on here and tell us all about it tommorow - My birth sister has an op tommorow ,which is also her birthday so , well, day for big thoughts!! Jess

Bacardi

Bacardi Report 23 May 2005 19:52

MESSAGE FOR RAINEY GALE i had my adoption file about 2yrs ago me and my sister were adopted and we recieved our files together very emotional time for me and my sister.before we applied for our files we met our 3 brothers who we hadnt seen for 35yrs and with there encouragement and support they advised us to have our files so we could finally put some ghoasts to rest good luck with seeing your files and good luck to every 1 who has been afected by adoption best wishes angie

Julia

Julia Report 23 May 2005 19:14

Hi all just a hello to keep you upto date with my family reunion. i met all the rest of my family yesterday,I have already met, birth mother , full brother and cousin. I met half brother, and sister, their partners and my 5 neices. We all met at my brothers house. i took along my daughter whose nearly 21, she has been involved in my search since i started 2 years ago. It was all very emotional my birth mother cried when she saw her 'children alltogether'. I look very much like my mother and full brother. My brothers and sister welcomed me and called me big sis.(im the eldest) I found out that my birth mother had been told i had died (i was early and rushed in to a incubator.) My mother had told everyone that she had four children but her first baby girl died soon after birth. My brother said that every year on my birthday mum said a prayer for me. Apparently my grandparents (who are dead) sorted everything including telling b/m that i had died. How cruel is that!! (b/m was a minor so had no control.)My poor b/m didn't know i was alive until 4 weeks ago this wednesday. this has all happened so quick and she was very shocked. I now have too mums , my b/m rings me and texts me every day , we think about each other all the time. I have just watched my brothers wedding video 1989 it made me sad as i would have been a bridesmaid. My only regret is that i left it so long to trace my family, im 43. i was afraid of rejection and was not ready, as i am sure you will understand. All we can do now is to look to the future (god christmas is going to be expensive with two families) sorry to go on for so long, wanted to share with people who understand. good luck to all still searching Julia X

Sue

Sue Report 23 May 2005 16:53

Hi, I telephoned the senior caseworker in Coventry about my adopted brother Andrew Gay.She has got a colleague to look up the electrol role for the surname and his adoptive mum still lives in the same address so she is going to write her a letter explaining that a member of his birth family(me) has contacted them. One thing she did stress was that he had an unusal surname now,so if anyone comes across a male born 17th august 1968 with a unusal surname ,could you point him this way!! The case worker said that only his mum lived there,so either his adoptive dad has passed away or that they no longer live together. I know it would be so easy to find him if I had the date of his adoption,I would look up the date and look for any unusal surnames,but alass that is the only thing apart from his new name that I dont have,which is so frustrating. Thanks for reading this as I know I am ramblin' from Sue

Rachel

Rachel Report 23 May 2005 15:48

A nudge for Ann to see. Sorry Guys I've refered her here, thought you might have some advice for her.