General Chat

Time for a chuckle ,apologies if you have heard it.

Oops Blond Moment.

A Blonde was sent on her way to heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned
St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates, 'I'm sorry,' St Peter said;
'But Heaven is suffering from an overload of goodly souls and
we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals
to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'

'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the Entrance Exam
consist of .?.

'Just three questions' said St Peter.

'Which are ?' asked the blonde.

'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with
the letter 'T' '? The second is 'How many seconds are there in a
year?' The third is ' What was the name of the swagman in
Waltzing Matilda ?'

'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions
and when I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those
answers for me.'

So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some
considerable thought (I expect you to do the same).

The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and
asked if she had considered the questions, to which she replied,
'I have.'

'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with
the letter 'T' ?

The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow.'

St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that
indeed the answer can be applied to the question.

'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three
questions?' St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?'.

The blonde replied, 'Twelve'.

'Only twelve?' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?'

'Easy,' said the blonde. 'there' the second of January, the second
of February, right through to the second of December, giving a
total of twelve seconds.'

St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to
consider your answer before I can give you a decision,' And he
walked away shaking his head.

A short time later, St Peter returned to the Blonde. 'I'll allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question
absolutely correct to be allowed into Heaven. Now can you tell
the answer to the name of the Swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

The blonde replied; 'Of the three questions, I found this the
easiest to answer.'

'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'And what is the answer'.

'It's Andy'

'Andy ??.

'Yes. Andy,' said the Blonde.

This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that,
deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense
any longer, and turning to the blonde, asked 'How in God's name
did you arrive at THAT answer?'

'Easy' said the blonde, 'Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited
til his billyboiled.'

And the blonde entered Heaven..........








Sincere apologies to all blondes. F.

Very funny ,us blonds arn't as thick as made out....!!!!

FOLDS ARMS IN DEFENCE OF BLONDE


then laughs xxx

And Another. :o))>. Vicar dies and gets to the pearly gates, St. Peter told him he,d have to wait till he checked him out. While doing this a Gorgeous Blonde came up, Said Hello Pete, Go right in he said,At this the Vicar said, Whats this? I,m a man of God,Preached his word for Years,Whats She done thats better than me? St. Peter Replied.She was a Learner Driver, She,s Put the Fear of God in more people in Ten seconds than you have in your whole life.**M**.:o))>

Nudge for a laugh.