General Chat

I seen my family including living relatives that I myself do not have posted so I sent a request to the member
I have deleted the name of the member but would like your views on this please if anyone has time for a long read
I sent my first request late last night

MESSAGE 1 FROM ME
Hi NAME

could you tell me how you are linked to the My family please Regards Margaret
REPLY FROM MEMBER
Hi - I'm not directly connected but the link is through others and is quite distant.
My response
hi NAME

This is my direct family
I have not got living relatives names entred in my tree
I don't know if you are aware permission is needed to display them on Genes so would you be so kind and remove them off your's please

regards Margaret
Reply from Member
Margaret

Who said that permission is needed on Genereunited for living relatives? Others have raised the issue and nothing has ever been removed.

They are on my tree and will stay there. They re not only on this site but are also on several other sites. As long as the information is available in the public domain anyone can acess it so I see no point in removing it from Genereunited when the info is listed for all to see elsewhere.

Regards

MY RESPONSE

Hi NAME

It’s actually Genes reunited that says in their rules for using the site that you need permission

I’m sorry you have taken the attitude they are on your tree and will stay there as it was a polite request and I'm afraid your wrong

I wasn’t aware others had raised this issue I will take it up on forum later, but I can assure you Genes reunited act on peoples requests

I had once inadvertently done the same thing
the member reported me to Genes they wrote to me quoting the rule and informing me I had to remove them or they would

I had not been given the courtesy of the member requesting me to remove the names before she contacted Genes as without doubt I would have

I have given you that courtesy and my request was not unreasonable more so seeing as you stated in your response

“you are not directly connected but the link is through others and is quite distant.”

This site is all about helping people connecting families and sharing what information they wish to with others

The rule regarding needing permission was obviously made to ensure people respected other people’s privacy

Genes rule of removing names themselves is for the few that have no respect for others regardless

I would imagine it very rarely has to be imposed by Genes as I have always found fellow researchers to be very helpful and considerate

I have researched my tree for over 20 years and exchanged information with hundreds of people

During that time I have never come across a link to your family so "the link through others that is quite distant " that you refer to must be completely insignificant and is of no interest at all to me

it also seems not even of interest to your link through others because you are the only person on Genes displaying this information

I would appreciate if you could let me know the several other sites you state also have this information as there is a difference between accessing information and publicly printing it

In answer to your question "who said permission is needed I have copied the relevant rules for you read

As you do not have that permission and this is my second request I hope you will now be kind enough to remove them yourself today
Regards Margaret (I also included the privacy rules)

Reply from Member
Hi Margaret - my reply was a bit hasty, and as we are on 9 weeks holiday in OZ was perhaps a little inconsiderate, but I have my tree published on about 5 sites so the removal from GenesReunited will make little difference. It will still remain elsewhere.

I can do nothing from here but I return to the U.K at the end of March.

I'm amazed that anyone should wish to not reveal details of any persons living or not as they appear for all to see on the Internet. If I want to find the names of your parents, as you are well aware as someone who has researched for so long, I can do so withing 10 minutes, so where is the problem? I would like to discuss this further with you but I only have access to the Internet out here spasmodically and on Dial-Up it is not so easy.

As for security, I'm well aware of people trying to hide their identity etc but what is shown on a site such as this is of little use to anyone as the info can be found elsewhere and in more detail.

I can't spend the time reading your full posting, although I do wish to. It's somewhat different on holiday to sitting at home and having time to spare.

I'll leave it at that, but would like to discuss this further, if you wish, when we return to the U.K.

I assure you that I will only publish anything that is correct and as I post on other sites, if anything is not correct I will amend it.

I'm sure that we all have hundreds of living relatives that are in various trees and contacting them and asking permission to put their detail on a site would be impossible.

Yours in sincerity

MY RESPONSE
I too am amazed with your reply I made a simple request that in no way effects any part of your tree , and you come back with

" It's on another 5 sites" so the removal from genes will make no difference " it will still remain elsewhere"
but you're willing to amend it if it's wrong

You would like to discuss it when you get back

Inconsiderate is not the word

unbelievable to me or anyone reading it
In your own words you said
"I'm not directly connected but the link is through others and is quite distant"
I would say the link to my family you have is so distant it's extinct
more so why I would guess if put to any fellow genealogists or any thoughtful person they would remove it without doubt if requested politely to do so as you were

You have lacked any thought of anyone other than yourself and your own opinions of what other peoples wishes should be
taking nobody elses views into consideration you have shown me none what so ever, your response is all about you what you want and what you think is right
I truly do not wish to discuss anything further with you on your return in March

You can do lots in 10 minutes as you say
I have in fact within10 minutes traced one of the sites you have my information on and contacted them
the good news is they have the same common decency rules as Genes so I guess on your return you will have lots to deal with when I take the time to find the others thankfully I would imagine every site has the same rules protecting people from people that have no thought for other peoples privacy and wishes

as you obviously have access to Genes from OZ and the dial up was enough to reply to my messages instantly you are spasmodically capable of removing the information yourself that I have requested 3 times now

I too cannot spend my time in dealing with this
I don't know if OZ is in front or behind therefore in all fairness I will not be forwarding these emails to Genes for the removal of the information until tomorrow say about 10am UK time
as you said .....I'll leave it at that

Regards Margaret

Hi Margaret,
I have had similar problems with 'name collectors'.
I only have one tree online - and that's on GR. Didn't stop some plank - who was related to my dad's adopted family trying to copy my MUM's family.
I realised my tree was open to him and closed it - hence he has many people born in the wrong area.
I don't have any living people on my tree - apart from my mum and me - who are 'doing' genealogy. No need for siblings and grandchildren - I know who they are - and I even have my grandparents' surnames ******'d out.
I still regularly look up living siblings etc on GR and ask people to remove them from their tree - which they do for a while, then feel the need to add them again!
Makes me mad to think that some people seem to think they need the living to 'do' genealogy - which is the study of ancestors.

I love the wording name collectors I've never heard that one before
thats it you hid the nail on the head
I haven't been able to bring myself to enter the date my mother died at all and he has it on site
the sad part about that I can only make him remove the living but thought seeing as there was no connection he would just remove the tree if I asked after his reply I wasn't going to tell him how hurt I was
I don't have a problem sharing and I help out where I can I've met some really lovely people over the years
I've never ever come across anyone so self centered as this person
I thought he was a one off I'm sorry to hear you had a problem too
by the time I sent the last email I think you could maybe tell my patience was running thin
ahh well you live and learn
Margaret

They'll remove as little as possible.
Once on the 'name collector' trek - it seems addictive.
Shame they know little about these names they collect.
Personally, I'd rather know about the person behind the name.

I contacted this person to tell him about my dad's adoptive father - but when he stole my tree, he got nothing!!!
Shame, as grandad was a very interesting man!! LOL

maggie

I have at least one of those who I have contacted, she doesn't have living relatives, at least none of mine as she can't get access to my tree, but she has all my family which she has copied off Ancestry with some details on there that are inaccurate, but she is the wife of someone who is related to a chap who is married to my cousin's daughter lol
If she is so short of ancestors that she needs to collect our lot, then I feel sorry for her. I sent a message asking who she was and why she had them and she replied but when I asked her to remove them from her tree as they weren't closely related to her she ignored my request.

Stupid woman!

Lizx

Its so pathetic, especially when you find yourself/kids/ exhusbands adopted grandfather for crying out loud , on a ancestry tree of one of these clowns(which one couldnt access)
grrrr, had to reply they make my blood boil.
And these name collectors will read this and think they are soo great for fleecing us. And they can boast of a tree containing thousands...

Hi Margaret, As an Australian living on this end of the globe I would like to add something.

As I hack away with my chisel in this block of stone I do hope this message is not too heavy to row across the ocean in my flimsy canoe and deposit on your doorstep.

We Aussies are really so much behind in our technology. It's a wonder any of us manage to sit up half the night typing away on our Olivetti typewriters with carbon paper and correction fluid.

OK I would like to point out to said person that from this very backward country I can go to any public libary and move global information around on a computer. That is one option. Then of course in most big cities, a few of the smaller ones, and stranger than strange some of the smallest country towns, I can find an internet cafe, and taking care not to pour my coffee over the keyboard I am able, for a small payment, to access any internet site in the world.

The delete key is found in exactly the same place on my keyboard as it is on your side of the world. And I don't have to hold the keyboard upside down to be able to use it.

I suppose said person could be holidaying in a remote location. Take a look at a map of Oz and stick your finger in the middle of the continent. Yep, bit higher, around there. Might have a problem with internet access around that region. However I need to point out that if this person has been messaging you obviously through GR or A or FMP or whatever, they must have access to the internet. Interesting notion. Wonder if perhaps they left their slow dial up computer and trotted down to the local library they just might be able to solve this pickle very promptly without any more waste of time and potential invasion of your privacy.

Using OZ as an excuse??? Very questionable reply to say the least. What is dial up??? I have broardband, daughter has wireless. We both live in the boonies, she has a little more trouble than I do, she uses pay as you go and runs out of credit, so, off to the local library she goes.

Yes we do have librarys in Australia, and internet connection, and we also can turn an electric light on unless there is a blackout. Water also comes from a tap, we do not have to go down to the river with a bucket any more.

Please, who does this person think she is talking to. Plenty of us Australians inhabit the boards.

Sorry just mad me laugh.

Gail

Well - best of luck with this one Margaret - although if the details are already on other sites you may have a long haul on your hands.

Tree collectors!

I loved Yvonne's comment: "And they can boast of a tree containing thousands... " But is it a tree - or is it just a list of names? Whatever it is it is not properly researched so it's worthless. Do they care? Obviously not - so maybe, just maybe, you don't need to worry too much.

But it is irritating and I do hope you manage to make at least this one person see that their "tree" is a complete and utter waste of their time.

Jill

GrannyOz, Dial up is the first primitive form of internet connection. Some places may still have it. Not all areas are broadband conncected. Nope I'm not techo enough to explain it but I think it uses the telephone line in a different manner.

I've only been on broadband for about a year but I still managed to do everything with dial up.

Goes back to chipping away at her block of stone!!! Going out to wash the sheep and cut the grass with my scythe in a minute.

Margaret, you have my sympathy.

I found a lot of trees on Ancestry with my sister married to a man b in 1723. As many of them also had her (and my) father correctly named with his correct y.o.b. 1899 it was obvious that the degree that many of the tree holders claimed to have was in innumeracy. I sent an email to many of them (some I was unable to contact) pointing out their error and asking them to remove my family from their trees and some of them did but others considered my email to be rude. Some also said it must be a different person from my sister. I have a severe headache every time I think about the idiots.

Huia.

thank you all for your comments they have not only cheered me up they have cracked me up
It was also good to know that nobody up to now has tried to support what he has done which I never thought anyone would
Of course if there is anyone of them floating about in the forum they won't come on here with the heading Privacy on it
It's the first time I've ever come across anyone doing family history with such a nasty attitude like that and actually thought I was one off regarding someone having my information in there tree that had no link what so ever to it
what is the point because if someone sees my name and contacts him he has no answer only the one he gave me " the link is through others and quite distant" my head will not go round why anyone would want to do what he has
Putting together all your brilliant comments I am the victim of what is known as a name collector who impersonates women and tells lies about communications in OZ............ LOL

reading all your comments It's a pity Genes will not do more about offenders
I wonder if we all got a petition up that if somebody could not prove their connection to names on their tree and another member requested them to remove the information and they didn't they would be given one warning and if they still didn't their full tree was removed from that great delete button in Genes reunited

what amazed me was his offer to ammend anything he had got wrong
the only way he could do that was if I gave him more information
"AS IF "

He is 73 years old and I thought in those days men were gentlemen
so now I know for certain chivalry is dead
thank you all again it turned out fun

Hi Margaret I had this happen to me quite a few years ago I found after a number of polite requests that a whole pile of requests to view there tree worked wonders,
Seeing as he is out in deepest darkest mongolia oh sorry was that australia I imagine his inbox will fill up rather quickly

Thanks for the tip, Tania! I will try to bear that in mind for any difficult members.

Huia.

I reported my evil sister -in-law to GR as she had my husband,me and my step daughter on her tree without my permission and once i had send in the complaint they were soon wiped off,,in a matter of minutes really,,

Even if the guy is on holidy he must still be checking into GR from time to time to read his e-mails so he must be turning on his pc. it wouldnt take him long to wipe off a few irrelevent relies in his tree when he gets home

I absolutely agree with everything you have said, Margaret, including the tone you took throughout!

I found myself on someone's tree here once. !! Someone who didn't bother answering my first PM about a more distant ancestor, and who finally responded to another a year later to say he didn't know how we were related but I could look at his tree. Turns out his wife and I share grx2 grandparents -- my mother's mother's father's parents (but she didn't seem to care) -- and he'd added my grandparents, my mother and me to his tree by getting access to someone else's, I guess. He did delete the living names when asked.


I do want to point out something that I think most people don't know.

When you "hide living people" on your tree, anyone with access to your tree can't see the names.

BUT -- if the names are there in your tree, a tree search at GR will find them.

So you may be in your tree, for instance, and your details hidden when your tree is viewed.

But if someone searches for your name using "Search Trees", they will find it, with your membership info attached to it.


So -- I strongly recommend that people not put the names and details of living people in their trees at all.

Simply call them "mother" or "daughter". You know who they are, and nobody else needs to.