Genealogy Chat

This thread seems to have been long gone from the top of the boards. i guess that means all the adoptees are happy bunnies and no-one has any stresses and worries - which is excellent news. Jess x

Hi everyone My step son-in-law has just set me the task of finding his birth mother! I have her name and age and where he was born.....can any of you kind people tell me where I go from here? Many thanks Susan

hi jess thats lovely im glad you had nice holiday with your sister me and my brothers have similaratys but they were brought up totally different to me and there morals are nothin like mine more our charataristics are the same. things going ok with them at the mo iv learnt to take a step back and not get so stressed when i dont hear off them i had to cus it was driving me mad and think i was a bit possesive which isnt good,its been a roller coaster to say the least,so much has happend in the 3yrs that iv known them,hoping to see them all soon best wishes angie xxxxx

Howdy doody friends! Just spent a weeks holiday with my birth sister - did it last year too and agian, it was great! We enjoy the same things and really got on the boys nerves giggling like school girls! I always thought they way you were brought up influenced the way you are, I guess it does to an extent but still cannot believe that two people brought up in two completely different environments can be so like minded. We are both daft as brushes although she does have one faulty gene (she likes LIVER..Yuuuuuuuuucky!) Jess x

nudged for Lorna

Sorry about your dad/brother situation but yu can't do anything about it just be there for both of them and hopefully the situation will get sorted Money always causes problems in families thats why always trouble around births deaths and marriagesBoth need to realise you can't take it with you and it aint a happiness bringer where as blood is thicker than water and yes that applies to adopted too and love is still there when the money is gone hope this hasn't come across as flip its heartfelt. Had a situation in my family recently re money that caused been a lot of heartbreak but hopefully nearly over . About my situation I haven't got my original cert yet have b/m name and where i was born and court paper re adoption hey that cost 10 shillings and thats it so can i get any info anywhere would be grateful for all imputTake care

Lorna, it does take time, unfortunately. get yourself wound up and ready to go...and have to wait 9 months! i guess what you can 'be getting on with' depends on how much you know. Have you got your original birth cert? jess x , still feeling very sad about brother/ dad situation- neither will tell me 'what' exactly, but know it is about money and is 'big'. Whatever my brother has done, he has upst dad big time. I lost one brother when he die 14 years ago, and dad likened the sadness he feels now, to losing another son. ..and i am helpless...

update on my progress ha ha ha got the lady on the phone the next day who I needed to speak to she told me that the search now begins it will take 6 to 9 months and then I will be assigned a social worker to deal with my case >Great I am now officially a case. Can I do anything in the meantime all help and advice gratefully received.I seem to just go around in circles and get nowhere on this wonderful machine. Thanx Jesse for reminding me how old I am LOL I see myself as still 28 but today I found out I gonna be a granny OMG Take care all onwards and upwards. Sorry about your sad time Jesse

I am feeling so sad for my dad tonight.He has fallen out with my younger brother and there is nothing i can do to ease the situation. My dad (and Mum) have done everything for us, and more from the day they adopted us. i could neber do what my brother has done to upset dad, i suppose it just goes to show, that part of what you are DOES stay with you for evr, and what you become is in part down to what you started out as. Tim I love you Dad i love you too jess x

hi every one im bit sad today,my brothers has left his girlfriend of 12yrs they have 4 kids together.i found my brother 3yrs ago and took them all into my heart.he has just up and left he got no job no home no money he staying with his mom at the mo but shes an alcholic and that does his head in.he said he going to hitch lift to somewere and start a new life im realy worried about him i know he can look after himself but still the same its a big step to just up and leave,i just hope he knows what hes doing and he doesnt regret it love angie xxxxxx

Hi Peeps Been a long while since I checked in so its been lovely to read everyone's stories and catch up with what's been happening to everyone. Not a lot to report from my end really. To those of you who don't know, I traced my birth mother back in April after several years of searching, dead ends and false leads. Things are pretty good. We talk on the phone a couple of times a week, usually for a couple of hours at a time. We've had a couple of 'lunch meetings' and on her birthday at the end of last month, I went over and met the elder of my half brothers for the first time along with his wife and baby daughter, which was quite emotional as he's older than me and vaguely remembers her being pregnant and has known since he was about 9yrs old that I was given up for adoption and the reasons why. And birth mum is getting married again next year (she was widowed 9yrs ago) and she's already said she hopes that we will all be there as it would make her day! Love to everyone and good luck with your continued searching Lou x

hi every 1 hope you all ok just wondering if any one has read any good books on adoption and other peoples stories about adoption many thanks angie xxxxxx

Nudge

nudged

a big nudge for susan what a heart rending story hopefully she will find lots of love and support from all her friends on here

for Susan

Lorna ; of course they only work part time and the are ALWAYs off when you ring - If they work Tue Wed and Thur you can bet they'll have changed the pattern the week you ring! Try and think of it like this...You were born how many years ago? Have been without this info how many years?.... Its soon tommorow! If the right person isn't there tommorow, then demand to speak to the deputy.it would be unsual for them to discuss your file over the phone, you may need to make an appointment- ring them back and check that if you wait till tommorow that it isn't just to make the appointment - someone should be able to do that today for you. It is an exciting time, and prob a bit scary too - we're here.. jess x x

Well here I go starting out on what sounds to be a long journey Got my letter today saying my birth info sent to my local adoption centre and to ring for further info Of course the person I need to speak to not in the office today need to ring back tomorrow do these people work part time Reading some other posts on here I suppose I sound very impatient and will have to get used to this. Sounds like I have a lot of people pestering to do I getting nowhere on pc any help gratefully received Not very good at finding things on pc

hi julia my brothers partners were the same very jelous of me i wanted to spend time with my brothers on there own we had so many years to catch up on i think they saw me as a threat yes they were all delighted that we had found each other but it was very difficult and i think i tryed to hard to be accepted.i dont hear off one of my brothers to be honest i think his girlfriend gave him ultimatum me or her which is very sad.any way i did get to spend time with my brothers alone and i called it the bonding proggress and it cemented my relationship with them and there girlfriends are ok with me now i didnt find my brothers to take them away from any one and now they know that.i think it be good for you to spend time on your own with your mum you need that time together to realy get to know each other good luck julia xx

Hi Ang thanks for your words of support, it helps to hear someone else in similiar boat. Hi Jess Mum is 62 i am 44 so will be mother daughter relationship /friends,we have become really close, we are very alike, but at the moment she wants to see me all the time, but it is difficult as all the rest of new family want a peice of me as well, I want to see her on own as well. If i see one without the other they all get jealous (my full brother and half sis and brother i mean.)me and my bm need to spend quality time together on our own as lots to talk over but seems impossible . Im going to suggest a weekend away to sort things what do you think ? Julia x