General Chat

BBC 3 on Wednesday 13 April..9pm

A 24-year-old, left in a toilet at Gatwick Airport searches for his true identity and hopes DNA testing will help him locate his birth mother.

Gwyn

Thanks Gwyn, that will be very interesting, don't want to miss that programme. Hope the young man gets the answers he is looking for.

Lainey

Well good luck to him but it's not going to be an easy task.

I hope he finds her,if she wants to be found that is.



http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2011/apr/09/gatwick-baby-abandoned-1986


Marion

I haven't read up about this yet, but I guess being abandoned at such a place would mean his birth mother's nationality even would be unknown.

Perhaps getting a 'marker' in the test showing a particular probable country might help him.
He was adopted into a loving family, but is naturally curious about his roots.

Gwyn

I won't be able to watch this as we can't get that channel but will someone who does watch it puts an update on here please?

Wendy x

I always feel sorry for the Mums. They must have had a good reason to abandon their babies. And as the years go by,they will never forget them,but for fear of upsetting others ie the baby and his/her new family and her own new family if she has one,she will keep her secret.

Marion

Gosh ! I remember that.I hope he gets somewhere with his search.I think it will be a long shot though.I'm sure that his Mum would have been pretty desperate to abandon him like that.But she did in the place where he was bound to found very quickly.I was adopted,and never thought of anyone else as being my Mum or Dad.I have found birth family in the last few years ,so I have had my curiosity answered.I am glad I was adopted!
I do think that there is a difference in being put up for adoption and being abandoned though.He must feel like he was thrown away.

Thanks, have just written that in the tv mag, I always go through it and mark things to watch or record for later and also add anything on other channels not shown on main pages, so I don't miss things.

Lizx

On tonight.

Gwyn

There was an article in the Sunday supplement about it...........the poor mother must have been in a terrible state to leave him like that.

Just got OH to put in on record, as he`s watching the footie tonight...


Nicky

I have recorded it to watch tomorrow.

Lizx

I taped it and forgot about it, thanks for reminding me. Im so interested in cases like this.

i watch it last nite so will not give anythink away

but it was very intresting and good to watch

I have just watched the programme on BBC iplayer. So feel for Steven, every avenue he explored was a dead end, and I have gone through similar searching for my birth father.

As has been said, abandonment is totally different to adoption.

I watched it too.
You never know,his Mum might turn up yet. He has some strong features,so somebody may come up with a name/area.
When was it in the paper does anyone know?

Marion

I don't think I had previously realised what impact it must have on one's life to not know where you were born... It is the essence of so many of our ancestor searches, we declare it on birth certificates, passports and census and take it for granted and yet the poor man doesn't know.
Amazing story about the lady who found a brother.... what a chance in a million. That must have been a double edged event, - joy at finding a sibling, but perhaps a certain level of anger that the mother abandoned at least two children....Quite different to adoption, I'd agree.

Gwyn

He seemed to think there may be an Irish connection and his DNA profile suggested that too.
Wonder if the programme and the newspaper article will be seen in Ireland otherwise his birth mum may not know of his search now.
If she was a young unmarried girl who thought abandoning was the only answer would guess she wont find it easy .if at all. to come forward now.

His suggestion that all abandoned children should have an album started on them at the time, and kept up to date will all the info and searches together with any articles found with them ,is a very good idea for when the child gets older to give them some idea of their early life.

One cant imagine what the impact is to be abandoned when you had a family childhood yourself. Even as a WW 2 evacuee I always knew where & who my parents were even tho i went away in Sept 1939 and came home finally in Jan 1946.

I watched it and felt so sad for him in some ways. In other ways I felt he's had a good life since, with adoptive parents who love him very much and he is now happy and settled with a partner and little girl. He's turned out to be a smashing young man, despite his early abandonment, and I do wonder if it would be a good thing now for him to find out who his birth mother is. I suppose it would be, even if he is disappointed. At least he would know where he came from and, hopefully, be able to move on to a future happier life with that knowledge.

my thought was even now if for some reason the mother could still not come forword i hope she was watching the program so she could see how well her son was doing and i hope she will be evey prod of him for doing so well