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There is no such thing as a " problem child "Only children with problems.
I know its's been said a thousand times before but no child is born evil, they can perform evil and cruel acts but the answer does not lie in demonising the children themselves.
lets hope it's not too late for this pair (though I fear it probally is)
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I think I read that these boys were placed in foster care but with elderly foster parents who couldn't handle them, so there is some element of blame with social services and if they dragged their heels removing them from the parents too, then again social services failed.
There are far too many people who have children without considering the work involved in bringing them up and who continue to reproduce even when they aren't coping with the children they have, and sadly most of those children will go on to the same path as they get older.
I was rather angry to read an article in our local paper the other day. I will copy and paste it here but first will say that as an older Mum and single parent with a son who was planned for altho things went awry because I fell pregnant in the first week of trying..... long story.... I struggled but did the best I could, never got any help from anyone despite asking when he was young and I had post natal depression - undiagnosed but I realise now that's what I had - and the doctor I had at the time was useless.
We went without a lot of things so that I could take my son to see his dad and Nan in Malta and I didn't go out socially more than a couple of times a year till my son was around 9 or 10. I didn't smoke or drink and worked part time to make my way as best I could, I had my own house so was denied some benefits that someone in a rented property would get.
Now I read this report, and it seems unfair, but was always the way... had my son turned out bad he might have got more help and lots of treats.... it's still happening - reward the bad kids and ignore the triers.
Cash windfall to help deal with problem Norwich families
SHAUN LOWTHORPE
Last updated: 23/01/2010 10:30:00
Dozens of problem families in and around Norwich are to be given extra support to help turn their lives around as part of a £2.6m government initiative to improve parenting and cut yob behaviour.
Ministers handed the city council £30,000 for its family intervention project, which sees a team of 10 specialists offering targeted support to difficult families
But the final tally is set to be around double that after the council successfully secured other grants and funding to match the support it receives locally including from Norfolk County Council and Broadland and South Norfolk councils.
While Norfolk-based housing association Wherry Housing is also set to get £38,728 to support its family intervention team.
Often dubbed “super nannies” for the practical support they can offer, the teams spend intensive sessions, often for several times a week, with families living in council houses or housing association homes, whose poor behaviour can put them at risk of being evicted.
Since it was first set up three years ago, the scheme has helped around 120 families in and around Norwich and there are currently 10 support workers offering advice and support ranging from teaching families the importance of eating properly to getting basic financial advice.
Although often focusing on children, the teams can also pinpoint other problems facing parents, such as drinking, which can then be tackled.
Tina Garwood, the council's Families Unit (FIP) manager, said the cash would allow the unit to take on extra staff who will able to cover areas in the South Norfolk and Broadland area including Blofield, Lingwood, Brundall, Wymondham, Mulbarton, Long Stratton, and Hethersett.
And she said the scheme had life-changing effects for many families who may otherwise have hit the rails.
“We offer intensive support to families who risk losing their tenancies through anti-social behaviour and chaotic lifestyles,” she said. “Where it works it changes life patterns where there have been problems for generations.”
Speaking at the launch of the scheme in Stevenage, children and families minister Dawn Primarolo said the government was determined to make sure every child had the best start in life.
“Family Intervention Projects challenge, confront and support parents and children to help them change their behaviour for the benefit of the whole family and wider community,” she said. “Prevention is the best way to stop problems with families escalating and impacting on their neighbours.
From what I gathered from the tv report on this, there will be holidays and such for the families, lucky people, all for free!
Lizx
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Liz
I understand how you feel on reading that. My son and I did not have any sort of a holiday for well over 10 years ... and I worked full time to pay the mortgage. Life was tough and thank the Lord I had an understanding bank manager!
I never could understand how single parents on benefits could afford to run a car ... but that's another issue!
Jill
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I work for social services in a local childrens home, and see the children on a daily basis from these types of families
every possible type of support is offered to these parents but often they do not turn up for meetings or take up the offer, the ultimate aim is to support these parents and keep the child in a family enviroment, unfortantly the children with the most social problems are the ones that cant be fostered, and they end up in childrens units.
the cost of this £3000 per week per child
this includes the cost of their food, clothing, travel, and upkeep of the unit
the cost of staff to look after them ie keyworker, social workers, unit staff including cooks, cleaners,
the cost of proffesional staff , doctors, phycologist.
so each week in the uk it is costing that amount for each child in care
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Lorraine, I worked for 4yrs as a night supervisor in a school for delinquent schoolgirls, aged 11 to 18. They would get in a state about some rule they did not want to obey, and would break up furniture and tear up clothing. Instead of letting them suffer the cosequences and be withou what was destroyed, everything would be replaced in days.
I have seen the fattest girl in the school squeezing through a 1ft square windoe in order to go out and get drink. We chased men away regularly at night, and the police were no support. I have hiked young men out from under the bed of one girl who was in the hostel where older girls who were in training for work were living separate from the rest. It was nothing to find that someone who had run out of money would run off and go to the nearest lorry park to earn some more and come back waving notes in her hand.
On one occasion the sergeant in the police station some 30 miles away rang up at night pleading for someone to go and fetch some girls who had absconded as they were wrecking his police station!
They were not all from broken or bad homes though most were.
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it makes you wonder how much we take after our parents, could it be a genes thing or is it just living with it day in day out, that could make two boys turn out this way.
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The parents should have been sterilised after the first child.
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When we first moved here, (I had been divorced for 3 years) my youngest, aged 6 asked me where 'her' social worker was, because she wanted a holiday!
My reply - I don't know how to get a social worker.
A few years later, elder daughter (aged 10) lied when she had to give a reason for going on a 'camp' - which she realised only problem children - or those with social workers - went on.
I was dragged up before the head (I worked at the school) to explain what my daughter had alleged, and pointed out to the head that she had been hoisted by her own petard - my daughter realised she wasn't eligible (despite it apparently being open to all the children) as she was intelligent , well behaved I wasn't an abusive mother, and there was no need for a social worker - and my children had never had a holiday because of this. I was no more wealthy than these other mothers, but could bring up my children properly - and they missed out because of it.
My daughter went on the holiday.
Social services and the school were involved with this family - why didn't they realise how bad things were earlier?
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