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Back Seat Drivers

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

GoldenGirl1

GoldenGirl1 Report 26 Aug 2012 14:37

I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver's friend
It tells you where you are

I have a little Satnav
I've had it all my life
It's better than the normal ones
My Satnav is my wife

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's thirty miles an hour", it says
"Your doing thirty five"

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear

I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives it's advice

It fills me up with counselling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well,you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And - keeps me warm in bed!

Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I do wish that once in a while
I could turn the bloody thing off.



Emma

Jane

Jane Report 26 Aug 2012 14:56

Brilliant Emma.......I won't be showing it to my OH as he will just say how true this is lol :-D

DazedConfused

DazedConfused Report 26 Aug 2012 15:03

Great poem

But my little satnav and driving expert is male - does not own a driving licence yet manages to comment on anything I do or say. Often tempted to stop the car, give him the keys and get out and tell him to get us to whereever we are going!!

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it Report 26 Aug 2012 15:10

Sounds like ME but hubby has now admitted he cant justify to still drive so he has admitted defeat and surrendered his driving licence.

Bless him he was a very good driver but recent memory problems he has finally accepted he really shouldn't be driving

GoldenGirl1

GoldenGirl1 Report 26 Aug 2012 15:17

I wouldn't mind ladies but I don't say a word....

Cough.......splutter......choke.. :-D :-D

Oh by the way, my son sent this to his dad.

Shirley I'm sorry to hear about your husband, so sad.

Emma

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it Report 26 Aug 2012 15:49

Emma

he is having memory problems with words;He struggles trying to find what he wants to say. has been diagnosed with dementia , probably age related. Its not Alzheimer at the mo but who knows. Very frustrating for him but at least I drive.

Seems he may be given medication that slows down the word loss. got to wait though till OCT for his next memory clinic appointment

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it Report 26 Aug 2012 17:38

WHY this been RR,d Nothing untoward in the original posting ???

ChrisofWessex

ChrisofWessex Report 26 Aug 2012 17:38

Why on earth was this RR'd?

AnninGlos

AnninGlos Report 26 Aug 2012 17:40

Somebody having a boring afternoon by the looks of it, somebody who need to get a life for goodness sake.

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 26 Aug 2012 17:42

Why has someone reported this? it has already been on this site, in the Telegraph and all over the internet... :-S :-S

Hayley   Empress of Drama

Hayley Empress of Drama Report 26 Aug 2012 17:45

Bloody hell missed it again :-(

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 26 Aug 2012 17:47

I missed it too Hayley but I assume it is this one

"I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver’s friend
It tells you where you are
I have a little Satnav
I’ve had it half my life
It does more than the normal one
My Satnav is my wife
It gives me full instructions
On exactly how to drive
“It’s thirty miles an hour” it says
“And you’re doing thirty five”
It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it’s never ever
Safe to overtake
It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene
It lists the vehicles just in front
It lists those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear
I’m sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice
It fills me up with counselling
Each journey’s pretty fraught
So why don’t I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?
Ah well, you see, it cleans the house
Makes sure I’m properly fed
It washes all my shirts and things
And – keeps me warm in bed!
"

GRMarilyn

GRMarilyn Report 26 Aug 2012 17:49

How Strange ??

If its the poem about a Sat Nav ...I put this on thread 18th August and its still there !!!! :-D


Cynthia

Cynthia Report 26 Aug 2012 17:58

Strange??????


I think that about sums up whoever rr'd it !



Good one. Just about to send it to my vicar!!





:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

AnnCardiff

AnnCardiff Report 26 Aug 2012 18:25

some very odd people use this site :-D

JustJohn

JustJohn Report 26 Aug 2012 20:27

I R&R'd cos of the sexism in last 4 lines.

No, I didn't :-(

Calm down :-)

Think it is a funny ditty. Having spent last week continually being told to drive down one way streets the wrong way in Blackwood (with a brand new Garmin) would much have preferred my OH. Oh, and her Welsh lilt is so much nicer.

Bobtanian

Bobtanian Report 26 Aug 2012 22:32

are the maps up to date? the most sophisticated instrument in the world is useless when filled with the wrong information...............just ask my wife!!

JustJohn

JustJohn Report 26 Aug 2012 22:37

Bobtarian Ditto :-D :-D :-D

Though I don't think you wil get away with "sophisticated instrument". That sounds a very likely RR :-(

Bobtanian

Bobtanian Report 26 Aug 2012 22:57

LOL John.............Ive got Yoda on Mine............ :-D :-D

JoyBoroAngel

JoyBoroAngel Report 26 Aug 2012 22:59

thats all it was somebody needs to get out more ;-)