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This hobby has corrupted me!!!

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 10:24

Mmm, Margaret, you have a particularly troublesome OH there - I mean I get all that stuff when my OH is at home but then I do get 8 hours break a day from it. I shall consult my program facilitators to see if we can produce special guidelines for cases like this. I suppose laudenham is out of the question?

Margaret

Margaret Report 28 Jun 2006 10:33

Heather Sorry, I was pegging washing out. It's OK just towels, no ironing involved PMSL No, dont think I had better resort to that, I want him to walk eventually not knock him off his feet. I do get arthritis in my back and hips. Sometimes it can get quite bad. I must admit, if I feel lazy I make out its worse than it is and say I need a days complete rest. What better rest than sitting on the sofa with the laptop. Can that be slotted into your avoiding housework manual? Margaret

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 10:52

Oh yes - full use of disabilities is encouraged - in the case of hard hearted hubbies I would resort to mentioning 'women's troubles' in a hushed tone - that should see them off. Meanwhile, though my hand is shaking at the thought of it, I shall now click off from the internet and FINALLY get the accounts stuff ready for our boring accountant bloke to pick up. AND Ive got Tescos delivery coming any time now (that is one of my basic tips - dont waste time shopping when they can dump it on the doorstep for you). See you later.

Kate

Kate Report 28 Jun 2006 11:18

Heather... I already have the groceries dumped at the front door so will this be enough for me to enrol in the advanced class... I do hope so and i am practicing on all the other tips...But no one has mentioned the cooking side of this,,,thats easy,,you are now on a health kick...no bickies ,no cakes,no pies,no pastries..NO BAKING,,,,,more time to be on PC.,(hope this tip secures me a place in the class,,,, Kate,,

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 11:30

Im on a similar scam but with dieting. Hubby has commented on me putting on 2.5 stones in last 3 years so - empty cupboards and when he whinges, I just say well if they are full Id be eating and getting fatter. And sorry Kate, home delivery of shopping is really on the beginners basic course - you need to prove further experience in such techniques as olde Crone's 'Ive been on night shift' moves to get to an advanced level.

Chris in Sussex

Chris in Sussex Report 28 Jun 2006 11:34

Recommended.... Have a son/daughter home from Uni for the summer hols. Hopefully they will need 'something' that costs money, in my son's case driving lessons. Offer to pay in exchange for housework duties but remember they wont do it as well as you did before you got into this hobby....But anything is better than nothing! If you don't have above child borrow one from a friend or neighbour. Chris :))) Who must get son out of bed....The house needs a good hoover!

Kate

Kate Report 28 Jun 2006 11:46

ohhhhhhhhhh Heather..my grocery deliveries are only the tip of the iceberg,,,i actually shop on line too,so i dont have to spend time in the shops,,,so no impulse buying,,,less money spent on petrol. - which means more money left for certs,,gotta be worth a few points,,, I might have to ask Merry to help me out a bit.. Kate :)

An Olde Crone

An Olde Crone Report 28 Jun 2006 12:32

I did mean to congratulate a previous poster on the pile of junk in a corner with a throw over it technique and would like to add further to that. When your OH/MIL casts a disapproving eye on it and says when are you going to do something about that lot, put on your prissiest face and say 'Its called tough love - I am trying to teach them the consequences of their actions and help their future partners. I want them all to be self reliant when I AM NO LONGER HERE' This last bit will bring your MIL up short (your OH wont notice it). She will think you have some terminal illness, feel terribly guilty at her delight at this news and be nice to you for years. HOME COOKING Buy ready prepared meals etc, but before you put them in the freezer, remove the wrappers and labels and decant them into various other containers which you have saved. Cover with cling film and label - voila! Home cooked food. They will never know the difference, particularly if that is all they have ever had anyway!Takes a few minutes, but you could do this while waiting for computer to boot up. You could also say that you read a most interesting article which says that hot food is very bad for you and the family is going to live on sandwiches from now on. Crush up the odd vitamin tablet and add it to sandwich fillings if you're worried about their health. HOUSE BOUND HUSBANDS Jigsaws - not for everyone, I admit, but when it works, it keeps them at the dining table. Darling, you have had such an interesting life/career at the gasworks, why dont you write your autobiography? This would be a wonderful thing to add to my family history research and the grandchildren would adore reading it - why, you could even try to get it published. Not many men could resist that. OC

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 14:14

Well, teach me to concentrate when I do my Tesco on line ordering, wont it. Did the order, looked at GR, hubby enters, I minimise back to Tescos, hubby says 'Can you order some bananas to go with me Wheetabix?' Slightly flustered, having nearly been caught out, I enter bananas in the search while he is standing there, It ask me how many I want, so I enter 7 - that enough for him for a week. 'Ok, I say, triumphantly thinking he is going to think me sitting here is really very useful 'thats done'. Tesco man just turned up, chatted, left, I start sorting the bags out with Ralph Terriers help - what have I got??? 7 bananas??? NO, I have 7 BAGS of children treat size bananas. What an idiot. So the bloke who just delivered my new compost bins got a bag, the bloke cutting next doors hedge has got 2 to take home to his kids. Ive tried to force one on elderly neighbour two doors down but (oh God) she took out her top set of teeth to show me her gums are too sore for bananas. Ah well,

*** Fuzzy

*** Fuzzy Report 28 Jun 2006 14:18

LOL Heather!!! I have been so good today, I have even defrosted the freezer....Oh ok, it is sitting in the garden defrosting itself while I am on the computer, but hubby wont know that when he comes in later! As far as he will be concerned I have been out there with a plastic scraper for.....Ooooh at least three hours!! Fuzzy x

An Olde Crone

An Olde Crone Report 28 Jun 2006 14:19

Heather No, no, don't despair - banana milkshakes are tremendously nutritious and it sounds as if you have enough there for a week's worth of meals. Rather clever of you, I'd say. OC

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 15:33

Blimey olde Crone, I forgot that I bought a smoothie maker a couple of months back at youngest sons demand. Its been used once and stuck in the cupboard. Oh yes, banana milkshakes - shall I go and collect the other bags back do you reckon?

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 15:35

My moment of triumph has just occured. Other half asked what i was doing,'Job hunting' i replied,forgot to mention that i was hunting for Job Goulson and his parents!!!! Does this entitle me to any improvement in my worth? Glen

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 15:36

Well, perhaps I'll loosen your ankle manacle by one notch.

Dea

Dea Report 28 Jun 2006 15:40

Heather - That's a POOR excuse - How can gums be too sore for bananas?? My 'Daddy' was 'epileptic' and when he was young they pulled out all his teeth (It was supposed to be necessary??) - anyway, he used to be able to tear away at pork chops with his gums - even sore ones, I would think, could manage a banana!! Dea x

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 15:41

Now that does feel better. Can i have a longer chain though please,i can only reach back to about 1780 so far,and am feeling very stumped at the moment. Glen

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 15:50

Dea, Im certainly not going back to question her again. This time she may say its to do with her piles. Meanwhile, accounts STILL not done as my eldest son rang up to say he has 2 tickets for youngest son for Big Bro on Friday. I ring youngest son - cant go. So now Ive had to ring other people who have to sort out if they can get time off work and Im sitting here like a ********** lemon sorting it all out.

Glen In Tinsel Knickers

Glen In Tinsel Knickers Report 28 Jun 2006 15:56

Me thinks the last post came out of nowhere!! This thread has corrupted me to the point where i am offering my services 'Tinsel clad cleaner,will work for certs'

Heather

Heather Report 28 Jun 2006 15:59

AND have I given you permission to do that, Glen?

Rachel

Rachel Report 28 Jun 2006 16:03

For a minute there Glen I thought that they had forgotton about you, was going to suggest Google search 'Emergency Locksmiths' :-)))))