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adoption/please be gentle on adoptees *PART TWO*

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Still Searching !!!

Still Searching !!! Report 2 Apr 2005 12:27

Hi im wondering if anyone can maybe explain what this may mean. On a birth cert we have ( child was adopted) were it says adopted by the side of it EIGHT. B.W is wriiten. Does anyone know why or what this may mean? Many thanks.

The Bag

The Bag Report 2 Apr 2005 12:38

Only guessing, nothing more... Wonder if the child was aged 8 when they were adopted, and BW the reigistrar? ONLY A GUESS!! ................................................................................... having thought about Gerri's message a bit more, and laid and thought about it late into the niht in my bed........ Isn't that why we adoptees look? to see what might have been/could have been, and then evaluate where and who we are now? Joan describes Gerri's sisters life as 'not having been a bowl of cherries' presumably it wouldn't have been had she been kept. Don't know. Might have been better, might have been worse. maybe gerri wouldn't have happened if her sister had been kept.. I wouldn't have had the pain of my brother dying had i been adopted by someone else, or he by someone else, not mum and Dad Its all stitches in the Tapestry of life - one stich in the wrong place or in the wrong colour and the picture changes. Jess


Julia Report 2 Apr 2005 13:10

Hi everyone, Jess lovely to hear about your sister, you sound really close. I have some great news, one of my half sisters has emailed me several times now. I did not think they wanted to know, but they were shocked to learn about me as they never knew of my adoption. The one that is contacting me is the youngest of the three, she never mentions the others, but i am happy to be in touch with at least her. She has given me lots of info on my Birth dads family, and the most exciting thing is she has emailed me some pictures of My Dad!!!.(he died 1977 i was only 16 so would not have been able to trace him.)HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY Julia X


Unknown Report 2 Apr 2005 16:55

glad to see more troops arriving to join our ranks! ha ha Been trying to relax and not doing that badly, 'but could do better' where have I heard that before???? Anyway, I should be home again tomorrow. Well, that is to say, I'll be back at the house I currently reside in tomorrow. Planning to stay with family for a week or two shortly so that I can seriously start looking for a home here. The thoughts of going back are seriously depressing. I don't want to go back, to tell you the truth. I know the grass isn't always greener on the other side but they can't be any worse than what I'm having to live with back there! Anyhow, i'm off now. I have something to work out.... if someone you classed as a friend suddenly sent an email to a relative u had just been reunited with, after only just being on the phone the night before with this friend telling them what has happened since u last spoke. what would u think? bear in mind this friend is someone u trusted. wot would u do? as far i know this friend hasn't done this before. can anyone give me some advice pls jules

The Bag

The Bag Report 2 Apr 2005 17:18

Jules who that you tryusted mailed who - message me, cos want to helpbut dont really understand the question - sun is addling my head!!


Unknown Report 2 Apr 2005 17:51

jess i have emaileed you direct. thanks


Sheila Report 2 Apr 2005 19:07

Hi Jules, It depends what the friend said in her e-mail, are you sure she wasn't just offering her Best Wishes to you all. Sheila


Rainey Report 2 Apr 2005 19:19

hi everyone glad to see everyone is doing ok, and good to see that there are a couple of guys on here as well, i'm doing ok am going to contact joan on monday she tried phoning me but my landline is playing up, so if its not fixed by monday i shall put more credit on my phone and give her a call, still no sign of my adoption file, have phoned smedley hydro about it and they still say they are running behind this is so frustrating, as i want to know information surrounding my adoption, i dont think its going to be to good, by something i have been told over the last couple of days, by two people. i was told that i was in need of a lot of love and care, and my adopted brother told me that my mum and dad told him that i had a few issues, i have also learnt that i went into laneswood childrens home via social services, be it good or bad i still want to know EVERYTHING i feel i have this right love to you all lorraine


Unknown Report 2 Apr 2005 19:27

Hi Sheila, I don't know all the facts of the email except that there is some concern. I have trusted this person (on this site) and feel betrayed. How do I know if this person have contacted my adoptive family or anyone else for that matter. That is my decision to tell people what I want and when I want. No one has the right to ride roughshod over me and my decisions, even if they think them foolish. If they think that, then they should speak to me direct not someone I have just found. I feel really upset at this. I will see the email for myself before I do anything else. Sorry for the moan. Jules xx Becky, Glad to see you may have some news to look forward to! Good luck and stay positive. Jules xx Hi Rainy, Hope you get your file soon. stay positive Jules xx


Unknown Report 2 Apr 2005 20:12

Hi Jules I can't believe that someone would do that especially in such an underhand way and without speaking to you first. I didn't give an opinion on your decision although I did agree with the concerns expressed by other people for whatever reason. BUT at the end of the day, you're a big girl and you are more than capable of making your own decisions. Ditto your own mistakes. If it works out then that is fantastic. If it doesn't, then you know that we are all here anytime you need us. Best of luck, hon Lou xx


Sheila Report 2 Apr 2005 20:52

Hi Becky, Glad to see your making progress if any of us on here can help in any way let us know. Jules I have e-mailed you I hope your feeling a bit better now, hopefully its a mis-understand that you and your friend can resolve. Sheila

The Bag

The Bag Report 2 Apr 2005 21:25

Jules.I have expressed concerns about what you plan to do but Its YOUR journey its YOUR right to call the tune YOUR right to say who should know what and when. It YOUR LIFE If this 'friend' has betrayed you in anyway shape or form then you are right to be angry with them.Hopefully the rights can be put wong and the person that is interfering will come forward, appologise to you and explain their reasons why they did what they did. thinking of you , don't get too upset until you know that facts Jess x


Unknown Report 2 Apr 2005 22:40

Thanks to all who have emailed me direct about above upset. As yet I haven't phoned or emailed this person who we all know as I feel it is inappropriate to do so until all the facts are in. I am still away until tomorrow and shall pop in here before I leave to see if the said person leaves a msg for me explaining why. I'm not as upset as I was but am fed up of people taking the michael. I trust someone and then they hit me where it hurts. Most people could brush this off. I can't. I suffer badly with depression. And I mean badly. I don't want any sympathy. I'm just trying to express why I am so upset. I have been betrayed by all who I have trusted. It's too complicated to get into. Thanks again to all who sent msgs on/off thread. It's nice to know that you're with me. I'm off to bed now. Catch up with you soon. Take care Love Jules xx


Donna Report 3 Apr 2005 09:33

hi everyone how are things going with everybody?, i have been asked a question by a lady on genes if she sends off for her sister in laws birth certificate who was addopted will she get her original birth certificate or her addopted certificate ,I thought the original birth certificate was only available to the person who was addopted maybe wrong could somebody advice me Jess I need your help again sorry lol Jules I am sorry that things are going wrong for you at the mommment I hope things will soon get better for you soon hi to everyone new on this thread nice to read all of your storys Jess and lou anymore look with your mom and brother? well got to go for now but take care everyone lots of love donnaxx P.s still no contact off my sisters ,Jess i think you are right we are in the same boat

The Bag

The Bag Report 3 Apr 2005 09:47

Donna - in a word the 'adopted' one Jess


Donna Report 3 Apr 2005 10:31

hi Jess thankyou for that information I thought I was right but I had better check first lol lots of love donna x


Unknown Report 3 Apr 2005 19:13

hi guys, Just to let everyone know that I have decided to stay away with family for the next week. It's just me and the baby. Hubby is being a star by letting me go and looking after the others. I plan on looking at houses whilst I'm here and chilling out if at all possible! will drop in from time to time. Hope everyone is ok. Love to all Jules xx

The Bag

The Bag Report 3 Apr 2005 19:18

Take care Jules - any news yet - heard from Grandad or will it wait till you get back? ~Jess


Unknown Report 3 Apr 2005 21:31

Hi everyone, Hope you are all ok. I'm ok, I think. Need to clear my head and find myself this week. Just don't know if I'll have time to do it! I have found 2 houses I want to look at this week so I guess I'll be busy visiting the estate agents!! How exciting!! not! Grandad sent an email or 3 that gave me a good laugh, which I needed and my sis emailed too. Just wish she had a mobile so I can text her. She isn't on here or friends. Poor hubby having to send email for me! I'm off to my little flat for the night now. Will drop a line when I can. Take care everyone. Stay positive. Love Jules xx


Sheila Report 4 Apr 2005 12:02

Hi Jules, Good idea, take a little time out and get yourself together, its been a eventful few weeks for you :O) come back when your ready we will all still be here. Good Luck with the House hunt! Sheila