Genealogy Chat

Thanks for the replies everyone. I've got a bit of an idea of what to write, i'll post it here, can you let me know what you think? Thanks Dear xxxx, I'm writing to you, as I've been helping mum research the family tree, mum was born as xxxxxxxxx xxx xxxxxxx in xxxxxxxxx on the xx xxxx xxxx, but was later adopted. We went to visit xxxxx relations in xxxxxxxx probably about 20 years ago now, they told us that there were relations in the xxxxxxxxx area, and over the past few years i've been searching through electoral registers and phone books and contacting others with the xxxxx surname in the xxxxxxxxx area. I hope you don't mind me writing, but as you can imagine, it's quite important for mum to learn more about her family. When we were in xxxxxxxx, we visited xxxxxx and xxxxx who lived in the xxxxxxx area, xxxxxx has a brother called xxxxx, who we were told lives in the xxxxxxxxx area, and we wondered if you might be any relation, if so, would be great to hear back from you. Thanks for taking the time to read this letter. Best wishes John. What do you think?

Hi John Keeping it short is a good idea,i would tend to avoid mentioning too much about electoral registers,it could make you sound a little too much like a stalker.Sometimes people find it scary and possibly underhand or devious. I think that although it is important for your mum and yourself to know more,you could perhaps say that your mum ' would dearly love to know more '(it puts a little less pressure on someone) Just a few thoughts,and i don't claim to be any wiser than anyone else here,i will leave it for others to comment as they feel they need to. Glen

Thanks Glen, I see what you mean about mentioning the electoral registers, will have a good think today.

hi john i think your letter sounds good,i second what glen says when i wrote a letter to find my brothers all i put was that i was looking for xxxxxxxx there 3 names and put my email address and mobile number on the 3rd fone call i had found all 3 in a month short and sweet sounds good doesnt put to much pressure on the person lots of luck angie x

Thanks Angie, I have decided i'm definitely going to write now, I agree with keeping it short and sweet, when we contacted my mum's uncle a couple of years ago by letter that was just a very short letter, straight to the point, and we got a fairly quick reply as well.

Hi Everyone, While looking through a paper today I came across my stars, when I read them I found them quite amusing and thought I would share them; 'They say that good things come to those who wait. What they don't say is how good these things will be,or how long we will have to wait. Are they trying to hide something? Might the whole thing be a ploy to to lull us into a false sense of security, while they rush out and get those good things for themselves? Prehaps you should question your decision to pospone a key plan. Why must it be put of.' I do not think this should be just be my weekly stars, I think it should be my life one. And after that I will email BM one more time and see how we go and if I don't get a reponse, well her loss not mine. For now I am over it Melisa

Hi all Mel the Impatient 1.......just love the new name You might just have to be satisfied with contact from bs and bc. Your bm must have a busy life at the moment. Or she might still have some guilt issues. Either way enjoy your other emails with the other 2 and dont worry to much about her. She will be in contact again one day. And if not thats her loss. But dont close the door just yet..... it hasnt been that long. Try to be patient....haha Annxx

Hi Ann Whaddya think of me tinsel then?LOL Glen

Hi Glen, I just love it LOL Mel

Hi all Glen Well my imagination is going on overtime. Do they tickle your .........um ....bottom. lol But i dont get the turnips. yuk turnips. Annxx..... and it did make me laugh

It all started in another thread about the 1841 census,blame Heather Positive Thinker. I think she has some other plans for me now though. Glen

Nudge

Hi everyone New name,new image and a heck of a shock. Completely out of the blue i had an e-mail from half bro this evening,with an attachment.First message since early February,and comes with a picture of my bm. The piccy was taken about a year after i was born,so it seems even more like her,the woman as she was,at the time.(you all know what i mean) Also had a result this week finding two more living rellies,one in his nineties (an uncle) and one in her thirties (a niece) Seatbelt securely fastened and holding on tight,here we go again. Oh and a job interview tomorrow,(tuesday). Wish me luck Glen

Hi Glen, Good luck for your job interview ! Gee I bet you spent quite a bit of time looking at the picture of BM and wishing it would speak, I know I did when I got mine. Have you heard from your BC again since the phone call ? And more rellies found are you going to contact them ? Yes buckle up, your on the roller coaster again The next big question will be whether you will ride the roller coaster with the tinsel knickers on, they could be a tad itchy !!!! LOL Seeya Mel

I was talking to my cousin when the e-mail came through,i wish i had checked it because my cousin only met her the once,and his description was spookily accurate. The uncle i found is in his 90's and has dimensia,he lives in a care home,after speaking to the home i have sent a letter to them and they are going to forward it on my behalf to his family. I bit the bullet and rang another rellie,she is my half sisters daughter,she confirmed that her mom had recently moved,was quite suprised but interested,and says she will e-mail some photographs from her childhood (pictured with her mum/my bs).She also said she will pass my address etc on,and get some contact details for other family members back to me. Glen

oh glen thats great news.what a week.good luck for the job. i'm in tears reading how well things are going for you.;you've searched so hard.

hi glen what a shock for you getting that pic of your b/m when i first met my brothers,they bought picture with them of my birth parents,at first i didnt want to see it but then curiosity got the best of me,out of the five of us kids i looked the most like my b/m and my sis looked like b/d iv not actually met them,only when i was little cus we had to have visits but i was about 9 when i last saw them good luck glen bacardi xxx

Hi Glen, it's fantastic you getting a photo of your birth mother, I guess it's one of those things all adoptees would like. I was going to post a quick note as well today thanking people here for spurring me on to write to someone I think is my cousin. I finally sent the letter off today, so I hope I get a response (hopefully not a bad one) from him, i'll let everyone know what type of response i've had, if any. Also, I wrote to my great uncle again to update him on the family tree, I kind of got the feeling he was holding something back when we were in contact the year before last, but I guess you can't really tell from a couple of letters. Anyway, best wishes all in your searches.

Hi John I just want to say 'Thankyou' to you. Your post last week made me get my act together and start looking for the living rellies and not just going through the census and finding gg g/parents etc. Up till then i had only bothered with my half siblings and had run into various problems. It might be a bumpy ride ahead,but unless you start you never know,at least now i have started rolling. Thanks Glen

Glen, I didn't think my post would really spur anyone on, but i'm glad it has, and I really hope you find what you're looking for. I hope the road won't be too bumpy for you. We've had a few shocks while researching the family, but overall, I think it's been worth it. Best of luck with everything.