General Chat

Hello Jude. Good to see you xx

Well, I go off to answer the phone and decide to make a cuppa and come back to 4 pages. Lot more suffering than I thought. It started for me when neurologist said he didn't think it was MS but nerve damage to my spinal cord, wham, it was like something had hit me hard in the stomach. This meant I would always be like this, legs not listening to my head, and 'oh by the way, you have two slipped discs now'. That was bad as my hobby was walking and bird watching, I seemed to go down from then on. When they told me I had secondary breast cancer then, I just got lost in a big black cloud, couldn't see any way out. My hubby took me to see our doctor, I just trailed behind him putting up no resistance, which I would have done normally. She said she knew me as a strong person and was shocked when she saw me, that's when she started me on the tablets. Didn't do much good though. Neurologist sent me to see a Macmillans nurse for pain management, she had a doctor in with her and I will always be grateful to him. He said I had so many health problems that I would never cope on my own and made an appointment with a psychologist for me.
She comes to my house and I have learned a lot of things about myself, mainly that I am still trying to act like before I was ill, I feel guilty because of what I can't do and hubby has to do it. She made me think of what I can do and be proud of it, I've started to listen to the different doctors when they say I am coping well, instead of thinking 'but I want to walk again'. My neurologist was very impressed with me last time he saw me, I went in on my crutches, struggling but walking. He said anybody else in my position would have given up long ago and been in wheelchair permanently, I don't see it like that now, as long as I can make my legs work, I am exercising them, my wheelchair is for shopping and such.
I am improving slowly but surely, the people on here have helped me a lot, and I can now see a future, not a very nice one as yet, but I can see it, whereas before I had none.
There are loads of different reasons why folks get depressed, and I have found out that talking to someone who knows helps enormously.
Sorry if I've rambled on, didn't mean to write so much but it wouldn't stop.
Took ages as well, the phone has gone 3 times so we might be up to page 6 for all I know.

Caz xx

I tried st johns wort but it did do any good, but then I found I hadn't taken a strong enough dose. Prozac made me have panic attacs.

I,ve just read this thread and have to say what amazing people you all are .
My Mum suffered from this all through my childhood and teenage years .She was hell to live with because in those days Dr,s just told you to "pull yourself together , find a hobby "
One day she,d be laughing and singing , next she,d be shouting and screaming at us ,even becoming physically violent packing her bags or threatening to stick her head in the Gas oven ..
It was really frightening for a child to witness .
Julie , I know what you had to put up with, he hasn,t changed and never will love . You did the right thing to get away and anytime you want to come down for a visit there,s always a room here for you . xxxx
((((HUGS)))) and I admire you all for your honesty and having the courage to deal with something that all too often is shoved under the carpet
xxxxx

Hello Carole - will return your pm:o))))

Farmer Giles - St Johns wort did'nt do anything for me but that stuff you drop on your tongue - bach remedies is very good, you put 4 drops on tongue and can take it ATLEAST 4 times aday:o))

jude

Caz what a lot you have to cope with. What can I say xx

Jude I used that is helped I fotgot about it. Rescue Remedy isn't it?

Hello Jude & Caz....nice to meet you.

Reading both your stories makes me feel glad to only be suffering as I am......proves things could be alot worse. You're both amazing people....n Jude, I feel for your son, I was a user, daily for 11 years, thought I couldn't cope without it....I'm lucky it didn't get me like that.....but it obvioulsy has had some affect on me..I don't even smoke cigarettes now.xxx

Thank you all for your support on here I'm off now. OH needs some attention!! xx See you later xx

Hi Kim.....lovely to see you again. Thought you may have forgotton me...lol.
I forgot you know my Ex, I thought the sun shone but I was wearing the wrong coloured glasses!!
Thats so nice of you to offer to put me up if I come down, was due to come today but not feeling up to the long drive.....might just hold you to that...xxx

Bye Carole...n Thank you xxxx

This thread started off as a support thread for those with depression and it has been a great success as far as I can see. I came on and read all your posts and I have to say it really does make me feel humble (to use an old fashioned word) that so many of you suffer debillitating illness with good humour (OK it may be your public 'face' but that is what is good about the thread, you can sound off about how you are but retain some humour. I feel humble because there are things I am no longer able to do because of a painful back, this makes me feel down, especially when my OH has to do all the gardening and I feel guilty about it. (He never complains), and I can no longer go hill walking in the Lake District, another thing we loved to do. However, unlike Caz, I can still walk, can walk 4/5 miles sometimes as long as it is flat. I don't need crutches or a wheelchair. So, thank you caz, for your humour on here and for making me see how lucky I am.

If anyone is fed up any time please don't think twice about pming me, I will always chat to you if I am on line and my shoulders are broad.

ann
Glos

Caz and Jude - no one minds if you go on and on for pages - really they don't. Talking about it really does help and when you read a thread like this you know you are certainly not alone which is a comfort.

What l have gone through is nothing to my son and alot of you lovely people. l am very very lucky - but at the same time it was'nt easy seeing my son so ill.
He was a user for about 5 yrs and used e's and acid on the odd occasion - docs said he was a user not an addict, thank god!! But he can't be in the same room as anyone else smoking it!!

Carole - yes thats it rescue remedy:o)) its perfectly safe as well. Did any of you watch the Elephant diaries - they used it on the baby Ellies:o))))

This is a brilliant thread Carole, welldone and well done to all of you:o))

jude sarf wales xxxx

C you later Carole:o))


jude :o) xx

I must go now but I will be back to read more later.

Thank you Carole for giving me the oppurtunity to say all the things I have said on your thread....you must have known I needed it. Thank you everyone for adding n replying, its so good to read n realise we're not alone in our dark depressing clouds.......it's helped me a great deal n I promise I will ring GP tomorrow.

Ann.....thank you for PM's....means alot xxxxx

If anyone wants to add me to their MSN please PM me.....I can be a shoulder aswell as need one. xxxx

Ann, gardening used to be my job and I loved it, only came in sometimes because it was too dark to see. Hubby has too much to do in the house so our garden is like a jungle now, nearly as big as well.
Isn't it awful with a painful back, I have had to be given a hospital bed because mine is so bad. On a morning hubby has to help me get out and I often wonder if them next door can hear us laughing and wonder what were up to.
Got a cuppa made for me now so I'll see you all later.

Caz xx

I'm now down to 20mg cipralex and 5mg risperidone a day but may have to go back to 10mg risperadone again soon due to all the stress of the past 2 months

Malc, I am not surprised that you need extra help. You have really been through so much the past few months. I hope you will soon be able to feel that your mood has lifted. And you have the lovely Jackie to help you along which is wonderful.

ann
Glos