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Auntie Motie a Genteel Tale of Everyday Life.

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date


CherryCrumbles Report 16 Sep 2012 11:19

Hi Susan, I think the difference between mixie, and cjd, is that humans supposedly cant catch mixie. But for all we know, those compressed food pellets that cattle were fed with shortly before cjd started contained rabbit with mixie. I vaguely recall some claims the pellets contained scrapie. Its supposed to be these compressed pellets that triggered it all, isnt it? I remember that when the government of the day said that British beef was safe to eat, I stopped buying it.

Patty didnt return to Teresa's home last night. Heaven alone knows what tent she spent the night in. My cat is missing again, too.

I'm with your OH - I dont care for the masses either, and prefer quiet holiday locations. My fear of crowds goes back to when I was a gel aged about 10 and Papa had taken us to Ridley Road market, he was holding my little sisters hand leaving me to keep up with him. Alas, a group of people pushed their way in between Papa and me, and I couldnt get around them to catch up. I got very panicky. Luckily, Papa stopped and turned around to see I was not hot on his heels, and waited for me.

The trouble with cruises is that you cannot just get off if the toilets stop working or something goes wrong with the catering.

Very dull here today, as if rain might be coming. There will be no complaints from me, as it will save me having to drag around with the hosepipe.

You mention your OH pruning the overhang from the neighbours. We have a problem similar to this, and on a dark night with no moon MFH has sneaked down the end of the garden and poured weedkiller over the fence. I think I shall tell him it needs doing again.



CherryCrumbles Report 16 Sep 2012 11:22

Well here I am at Southampton. I can see a huge ship on the horizon. I wonder if its the Canitti. There is a lot of noise filtering back across the sea - sounds of cannons firing and people making much merriment if all the hollering is anything to go by.

Oh oh - there are also a dozen River Thames Police boats on the water, and the Coastguard, and it looks like they are all headed out to the ship.

You dont suppose ....... no, it cannot be because of Petunia and her cohorts, surely even they could not create *that* much trouble on board a ship??



Diamonds-R-A-Girls-Best-Friend Report 16 Sep 2012 16:01

Good Afternoon Ladies

Dear Auntie Petunia when I think of myself spring and chicken are not two words that are in the for of my mind anymore :-( and although my mind does still tell me I can gallivant the body doesn't agree :-S

Well I'm certainly back CC :-) not sure I would say I've ever been normal though :-D

Susan you do seem to have had your fair share of rain :-( ...... was your OH wet pruning successful :-)

Teresa I was told the radio programme of the concert was pretty good :-) not that I heard it..........have you got a spare bed at your place of toil I just need one for a couple of day's so as recuperate, promise I wont be any trouble :-D


Cooper Report 16 Sep 2012 17:56

Hallo Lesley, I'm sure we could find a little space for you, not at my place of toil but in a few weeks time when FTE departs for the seven seas we will have a spare bunk here :-D! FTY has bagged FTEs room for the duration of her jaunt. More room for the devils x box in there :-(

I will be brief Ladies for Patty is causing some concern. She has pleaded with FTEs mate who is a trainee hair dresser to practice on her hair. She wanted a blond look but has ended up as a greenish colour :-S. Worse still she appears to have the same problem with some overhang like Susan and its not in the garden :-S :-S :-S :-S
I do think a vist to Dr Plastarky is in order. Patty said her young rich Jockey was willing to stump up the fees for a visit :-D he also offered to pay for a visit to Mr Sorbet to get her hair sorted.

Must rush, the sausage casserole is awaiting to be dished up.

Hope Auntie manages to get orfff ok Cherry, please don't let their be any waifs and
strays dragging along with her ;-)



MotownGal Report 16 Sep 2012 19:24

Breezes through the door of Motie Towers, and scans the place for derelection of duty.

How nice it is to be home again, it is lovely to travel but lovely to be home.

Can I smell something cooking, I blooming well hope so! Yes, come in all, I am sure that Cherry will point out your rooms to you, well, saying that, you have been here so many times, I doubt very much if you need a guide. No leave that George, we do not want the suitcases yet, they can be left here in the hall.

Yes, Octavia dear, I did send all the gift and trinklets down the cyber hatch, so they should be upstairs waiting for us to distribute. No Georgianna, I still cannot seems to get a proper answer to my question about the diamonds, maybe if we corner Cherry dear, she will crack!

Now come on in, Beatrice dear. You have not been here before have you? All the bedrooms are upstairs, but come on into the Parlour, there is a handsome piano there, and I know how fond you are of music. Come and tickle the ivories to see if the tone suits you dear, maybe later on you can play us something. Really? Can you really play that? Gosh, I am impressed.

Take dear little Valentine upstairs Francine, I am sure he is very tired after our journey.

How kind of Cherry dear, to come and meet us at the harbour. and to cycle all that way on the tuk tuk. I am really impressed, especially she did not bring Pat-trish-aaaah with here.

Now, come to think of it, we can not seen Pat-trish-aaaah at all yet. She must be around here somewhere. Teresa promised faithfully to send her home. Tuttty tut.

Ahh Mrs Berry, how lovely to see you. I have brought things home for you and your darling children. I shall sort them out soonest, what time did you say dinner was? Ready when we kind. About 7.30? Fine, thank you so much. We should be done by the start of Downtown.

Aaaah Cherry dear, come and dine with us, we have soooo much to tell you, and I believe you have something to tell us too. Ssssshhhhh. Georgianna, I am speaking now dear, not you, button it!

No, no Cherry dear, lets go into the Dining Room, and we can chat over the steak and kiddley.

Now, lets all go in together......................

Looks around the parlour and dining room..............who is that strange creature trying to hide herself behind the velvet curtains........................please, dont tell me...............oh dear!

Very disappointed, but still ravenous!
Auntie Petunia


CherryCrumbles Report 16 Sep 2012 20:22

all that way to Southampton in the tuktuk - and what happens? George has arranged for the car to be at Southampton so he can drive everyone back to Motie Towers.
I wonder how much weight I sweated off ....... there and back.
Acos the bloomin' tuktuk did not fit on the roof rack.

Now I am sitting here in the dining room, listening to Beatrice playing Chopsticks on the piano for the 100th time. Petunia has put the standard lamp on, with a 100W bulb in it, and pointed the lamp at me. And I am being grilled about diamonds. What diamonds. I only saw some dirty old pebbles fall through the cyber hatch and they hit me on the head, and those are the pebbles I glued down in the new stonery in the Walled Garden.

Ooooh Chopsticks again ..... this is pure torture, so it is.



Cooper Report 16 Sep 2012 20:39

Cherrrrrry,here comes the lamp down the cyber hatch, use it as you will dear, it might be usefull. No I have no idea where Patty is, I've not seen her for a while, do you think she is back at the Towers with her new look. It's quaite a change from her old one. Dr Plastarky and Mr Sorbet have done a wonderful job ;-)

Teresa :-D


MotownGal Report 17 Sep 2012 07:11

Good morning All.

Oh what a night, I forgot how much noise a baby makes, just existing! Crying, burping and windy-popping! I know George and Francine were trying to be quiet, but pacing up and down singing................well it was not quiet!!

The ship must have had marvellous sound proofing, but this rattly old house, it picks up every noise.

Yes Cherry dear, I was surprised at the musical entertainment too. I know she said she would play something oriental. I envisaged something from Gilbert and Sullivan, but Chopsticks!!! I ask you!!!!

I shall be pleased when all the trinklets are divided, and George has driven the ladies home, I feel then I can relax. And we can get to the bottom of this new blonde bombshell we have as the new housekeepers' help.

There is something familiar about her, but cannot put my finger on exactly what it is............

Thank you for the lamp Teresa dear, Habitat? Not Heals?

Off for a stroll around the garden, to see if I can hunt down these pebbles.............

Armed with a mafnifying glass
Auntie Petunia


Diamonds-R-A-Girls-Best-Friend Report 17 Sep 2012 14:29

Hello Ladies.

Today is the first day in a week I have felt I am back to my not so young self :-) Thank you Teresa a couple more days rest on your bottom bunk bed should do the trick..........I say bottom bunk as I'm not sure I could climb one of those little ladders to the top ;-)

Auntie Petunia the last I read about your rocks sorry I meant pebbles they had been glued into the stone work in the walled in the garden :-( if you are able to locate them may I suggest a little acetone will possibly help dissolve the glue.

You can take your ear plugs out now CC :-) the awful sound coming from the piano has ceased :-| the only noise coming from Motie Towers now is the sound of a baby doing what babies do :-) tomorrow I am hoping to be hearing the same sounds :-D

I hope the sun is shining on you today Susan :-)


Cooper Report 17 Sep 2012 15:41

Ou are welcome Lesley :-D. The bottom bunk is quite cosy and warm :-D

Auntie is Patty with you dear, I havnt seen her since yesterday and getting a little concerned :-(

Yours orff to poke FTE with a sharp stick for she is getting on my nerves and having a packing crisis for the forthcoming work jaunt :-|



CherryCrumbles Report 17 Sep 2012 15:42

well I really enjoyed George Gently last night, and hoped he isnt going to "do a Morse". Also nice to see Kevin Whately getting another outing, and not the first time he's been a naughty boy. Some years ago there was a murder series (Murder In Mind?) where he played a man who'd had enough of the neighbours and ..... I wont tell you what Whatelys character did to get said neighbours out of his hair; but it was very very bad; and he also worked it out so he wouldnt be at home when "it" happened.

There was another series with a similar title .. Touch Of Murder? so I am probably getting muddled over which series had which title. I wonder why we humans are so obsessed with a good whodunnit. The Sweeney (the movie) was on Friday night as well, guns blazing away and bodies all over the place.



CherryCrumbles Report 17 Sep 2012 15:45

Thank you Teresa, I will return the ruddy lamp to dear Petunia forthwith, as said lamp is more trouble than its worth

Oh dear look at the finger marks all over it, I must give it a good rubbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb

aaarrrggghhh oh no here we go againnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn


CherryCrumbles Report 17 Sep 2012 15:49

well that is the last time I rub that lamp. I cannot bring myself to tell you about the latest encounter with that geni. All I will say is, he has never been a gentleman.

*watches dear Petunia stroll down the garden with a magnifying glass*

I wonder if the rumour that these pebbles are really rough uncut diamonds is true. If it is, she will need a chisel as well.

*calls down the garden path......*



CherryCrumbles Report 17 Sep 2012 15:51

~~~~~~~~~~~ to Lesley. Enjoy your time with your little grand daughter. As you know, from raising your own offspring, they dont stay tiny and cute for ever :-D



CherryCrumbles Report 17 Sep 2012 16:23

has anyone seen Susan nz? Thanks for the rain we had this morning Susan but it didnt last for nearly long enough and soon dried up. Next time you send some rain over to me, please be a little more generous :-D :-D

actuallyyyyyy .......... I was thinking of having a session in our super duper new jacuzzi in the backyard, only it was raining, and I didnt want to get wet in the rain en route to the jacuzzi.



MotownGal Report 17 Sep 2012 20:33

Damn and blast and balderdash!!!!!!
Sobs. My beautiful pretty nails................never have they been in such bad condition. Never before have I been scrabbling around on my hands and knees, trying to dig up my uncut diamonds. Get....................them..............out!!!!! I want my tiara!!!! sobs again.

Heads will roll for this. Stomps back to the house.

Cherrrrryyyyyyyyy!!!!! Pat-trish-aaaaaaaaah!!!!!! get down here at once! Where are you two hiding??????

I wish I had that rifle in George Gently last night, I could blast the diamonds out of the wall! Not amused at all.

To think I brought back all those beautiful things for those two ungrateful wretches, and they do this to me. Urrrrrggggghhhh!

Petunia! What on earth do you think you are doing? Getting worked up over possessions. Not like me at all. What was I thinking? I am sure that there must be a reason for this. Calm down dear!!

Now, Pat-trish-aaaah come to Grandma, there is a good girl. Now, come on dear, what exactly have you done to yourself dear? Ah, a makeover? Is that what it is called. Golden Blonde dear? Well yes, I can see that dear. Maybe we should tone it down a bit? No? Just a tad dear, just to get rid of those brassy tones. No, no, of course they wont dye it back to its natural colour. If you want to be blonde, be blonde. They what dear? Have more fun? Oh I least I think I do.............right well, what do I know?

Now dear, you seem to have erm, developed, overnight. Gel filling? And chicken fillets? Is that some kind of diet dear? No? Oh, I seeeeeee. Well if that is what you want dear, then, ok, maybe a tad smaller, just so you can see your feet? Yes, dear, subtle, that is the word. We can talk about your outfit later, I can see Cherry dear trying to slide by without us seeing her.

Just a minute dear, now we are alone.........................please dear, get the lamp, I want it all back to normal...............

Thank you dear, now, just a little rub.......................

Talking to a large man in pyjamas and a turban
Auntie Petunia


Susan-nz Report 17 Sep 2012 21:25

Have you got extra's staying?. You are not being mistaken for the Marygold 'Otel I hope.. I seem to remember a few turbans in that ;-).
Actually, I can picture you as a cast member in that movie... Do you agree dear?

I do hope you can rescue the diamonds, as you are well aware, they are a girls best friend. I have a good friend who has alot of diamonds...... She sparkles :-D.
I, however, am not so much sparkly, as 'glowing very very very faintly' :-|.

I am just remembering a song Petunia. "Diamonds are forever, forever" - unless they are firmly stuck in a rockery..

The sun IS shining down on us today and about ruddy time too.. We have had the most awful weather. My OH did don his wet weather gear on Sunday and climb onto the roof and clean out the guttering...
I have taken the puppy for a walk this morning as fruit was away overnight for work and her OH leaves about 4am each morning :-(. The puppy loved her run and retrieving the multitudes of sticks that I threw. Shame she mistook my thumb for a stick :-D, tis very sore.

Have fun with the babby Lesley, she must be growing like a little mushroom?. I have heard it said, the best part of being a grandma is being able to give the babby 'back' to its parents??

Teresa, hope the stick worked? Things may get a little fraught as 'D' day nears me thinks.. I remember the feeling when fruit left home, her older fruit had been gone a few years and I was used to that. Never quite thought as far ahead as us being Darby and Joan... At least you will have FTY for a while yet. Imagine all those sidelines that you still have to stand on ;-) ;-).

CC, Jacuzzi ? Get you.. I agree, who would want to get wet before getting in a pool, not moi !!

I had better get my skates on and on with my day. I am going to go via the butcher and buy a dog a bone, she is going to love me today... ;-)

Toodle pip


CherryCrumbles Report 18 Sep 2012 14:14

*eyes Petunia warily while slinking past behind her. She can haggle with the geni, I think, acos I cannot take any more surprises or nasty shocks.

I am just about getting used to Pat rish aaah trying to look like Diana Dors (and failing).


LOL, I dont really have a jacuzzi in the backyard Susan, that was one of my little jokes - about 'not getting wet' before 'getting wet' ........ As it 'appens, my favourite garden centre is selling jacuzzis and offering a free trial. That is one free trial I wont be q'ing for!!

I am pleased to hear the dog is all right now, and your thumb will heal. Eventually !

Sometimes I have Empty Nest Syndrome quite badly. Then I remember all the years with messy bedrooms, the messy bathroom, never having loo paper on the loo roll, the sinkful of filthy crockery, the generally dirty kitchen ..... however, MFH still hasnt learned that it isnt against his religion to clean up after himself ;-) :-D (only joking about MFH ..... since the offspring have grown and flown, the house stays reasonably tidy inbetween cleaning sessions)

I once found a piece of prime steak down the loo pan. Oldest Offspring eventually admitted responsibility, because the dear child wanted a clean plate asap in order to go off and play. You know the scenario : "you will sit at that table until your plate is clear".



Diamonds-R-A-Girls-Best-Friend Report 18 Sep 2012 20:05

CC I thought you were talking about my fruits and MOG :-D


MotownGal Report 18 Sep 2012 20:08

Please Genie, grant me these three wishes, and I will tranport you back to Bagdad, or anywhere else you would like to go, via the cyber hatch.

OK? Deal?

1. Please put Pat-trish-aaaah back to the potato faced, frizzy haired, lump of a grand-daughter that I know and love.

2. Make the pebbles re-appear into the tiny pouch that I brought them back in. I dont care how grubby they are.

3. Please give peace and contentment to my dear friends and family.

There not too much to ask for was it? Nothing purile like winning the Lotter.

Fair enough then Genie. 3-2-1 and back in the Room. Off you go.

Peeps through fingers..........................peeps a little more....................takes hands from face.

Well I am still in the same room. My pile of trinklets are still here with the pouch on top. Dare I open it? Deep breath....................................whooooopeeeee!

Now, the acid test...............Pat-trish-aaaaaaah! Door opens and Pat-trish-aaaah comes lolloping in! Ah dearest girl, come and give your Grandmama a kiss dear. Oh dear, you did not shave today did you dear? No dear, I will try and untangle you birds nest of hair a little later. You do look well dear. well as can be expected in the circumstances.

How lovely it is to be home again, with everything tickety boo. Dear little doggy has been collected too, so we are a full family unit again. How wonderful.

Now Cherry dear, do please give Mrs Berry my compliments on the meals, she has been a wonder while I was away. No crockery broken. No glasses chipped.

I was so pleased to find out that we did not have a jacuzzi installed in the garden, only the gardener with his truss of tomatoes.

Susan dear, we are in the Autumn of the year now, and it has turned decidely chilly. I think I may have to look out the vests soon. And the liberty bodices. And the full length slips. I must keep my chest and back warm.

Pleased your little doggy is now well. Pets are almost like children, we fret over them so. I dont know what I would do if anything ever happened to Trickey.

Now, as I am back in the real world, time to go back to my Good Works.

I shall be going to St Hilda's in the Briars tomorrow. It is a fairly new church, and they have not had the benefit of my experience yet. I shall speak to the nuns and give them the rosaries we bought in Spain. I think I shall suggest a scheme whereby the dear gels going for their first communian will get of the same rosaries.

I shall call it the Lavinia Rosary Legacy. I think that has a nice ring to it. In honour of my dear departed friend. I do hope you approve.

In a reflective mood
Auntie Petunia