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Bad childhood jokes

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Allan

Allan Report 10 Apr 2019 21:40

Two lorries carrying cheese have crashed on the motorway which has been close until further notice because de brie is everywhere

Dermot

Dermot Report 11 Apr 2019 11:44

Insanity is hereditary. You can get it from your children.

Caroline

Caroline Report 11 Apr 2019 18:51

:-D :-D

Allan

Allan Report 12 Apr 2019 11:23

My best friend never married but he had a few near Mrs




Dermot

Dermot Report 12 Apr 2019 14:05

Children brighten up the home They never turn the lights off.

Allan

Allan Report 15 Apr 2019 21:50

My Doctor has just prescribed some gloating cream for me.

I can't wait to rub it in

Allan

Allan Report 25 Apr 2019 03:12

How do you start a milk pudding race?


Sago

Dermot

Dermot Report 25 Apr 2019 06:12

Why do polar bears have fur coats?

Because they would look silly in anoraks.

Allan

Allan Report 5 May 2019 00:20

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?


A stick

Dermot

Dermot Report 5 May 2019 08:54

If I want to hear the patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on the cat.

Allan

Allan Report 4 Jun 2019 21:32

Before my surgery the anethestist asked me whether I wanted to be knocked out with gas or by being hit with a boat paddle.

It was an ether / oar question.





Dermot

Dermot Report 5 Jun 2019 08:07

Ballet dancers are always dancing round on their toes.

Why don't they hire taller dancers?

Allan

Allan Report 5 Jun 2019 21:43

My son is now at a age where he is curious about the human body, so I guess I’ll have to move it out of the house and bury it.

Dermot

Dermot Report 6 Jun 2019 19:23

My dad heard that most accidents happen within two miles of home.

So he wants to move.

Allan

Allan Report 6 Jun 2019 22:00

I’ve just bumped into the man who sold me an antique globe . It’s a small world!

Dermot

Dermot Report 11 Jun 2019 19:18

A group of youngsters were having lunch at an open-air restaurant when it started raining really heavily.

It took them two hours to finish their soup.

Allan

Allan Report 11 Jun 2019 21:56

Does any one remember my joke about my spine? I think it was about a weak back

Tawny

Tawny Report 12 Jun 2019 12:23

An inflatable boy goes to his inflatable school and the first lesson of the day is taught by his inflatable headmaster. At break time the inflatable boy takes a drawing pin and starts sticking it in to everything. The inflatable headmaster comes over to speak to the inflatable boy “I’m very disappointed in you boy. You let yourself down, you let me down in-fact you let the whole school down”.

Tawny

Tawny Report 12 Jun 2019 12:25

One One was racehorse Two Two was one too. When One One won one race Two Two won one too.

Dermot

Dermot Report 12 Jun 2019 21:10

If a cow laughs, does milk come out of its nose?